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A bigger picture journey... Scares, thrills, questions, decisions... What a mess!
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Maybe sometimes it is good to document the less good experience.

    First session since the SuperO. Much less success. But it is good to recognize the cues. Now I have the impression I know where (and sometimes why) it went wrong.

    Start works better than ever. I started aless in a flash but couldn't get to actual O (maybe minis, can't remember but definitely not dryOs though pleasure was very good). Apparently need a little help of my training wheels so I went to the Eupho for some assistance and amplification. Which it reliably did...But I quickly became too eager, too nervous, too systematic, faking arousal for a few bonus points... In a word : reaching.

    Result is the usual plateau effect. But during the session I still could enjoy some tinyOs and miniOs (they are more or less the same except the tinys are so mild and half baked I would not recognize them for orgasms if I didn't knew the minis). Also had a few dryOs but mild and half baked. Funny I never had them before actually. In the previous session (the surprisingly super successful one) i directly went from good miniOs (without involuntaries, this is how I differentiate them from dryOs) to non stop chain reaction of dryOs (I am told I can call a super but my guess is I may revise that with later experience). This time I could recognize the much shorter (and less full) isolated dryOs (I think they were half baked as dryOs go). Though I tried hard (stubborn and stupid) and consequently ended up kind of frustrated (double stupid) it's good that I had some consistent experience with the past one. Things seems to be progressively falling in place. Need more practice. And I end up glad I wrote that advice to "stay (as) low (as you need to practice in comfort)".
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Additional pieces of advice for myself and whoever it might help:

    - Your session is as good as your preparation allows... No more
    Why am I not doing better? What am I doing wrong? Well... This is missing the big picture. If the preparation is wrong, no matter the knowledge and effort... I will fail.

    - What is good preparation ?
    Many things. But to make the concept clear the most wanted element of preparation would be "full rewiring". With full rewiring everything would happen easily and naturally, without any rewiring at all good luck on getting anywhere. Most of us are inbetween. Ok now the more helpful answer (i will certainly miss some keys, sorry).

    -- For no particular reason, I think of muscle awareness and strength first.
    The most efficient training for me is all variations of the "stop flow of urine". With different positions and situations, different strength and duration of hold and release (until my favorite "drop by drop"). This was pivotal in my progress as it is what taught me to control my reaction to strong urges. At first it was barely bearable. The bonus of these exercices is they are intensly pleasurable. Kegel exercices on the other hand bore me to death and don't do so much to me. Another great and pleasurable training seems to be aneros sessions themselves (or even a-less)... well, at least when you get the Pwaves and significant involutaries. One more good reason to have a session. Final word: no muscle no physical orgasm.

    -- Previous experience.
    Yeah, great! How do you do the first time? Well, prepare with remotely comparable experiences. The "stop flow exercise" mentioned above is a good start. I found very helpful the advice of Mentak Chia of trying edging closer and closer and slower and slower until you can separate and differentiate orgasm from ejaculation. This is how I discovered orgasm and was consequently able to recognize, welcome and encourage miniOs. And from miniOs the same further on. For Pwaves it was the same, first I had two superTs in a day, then my prostate was so excited it gave me ghost Pwave. And knowing Pwaves I could recognize, welcome and encourage them. Final point: go step by step don't rush to the end cause you wouldn't know what to expect and do there. The occasional experimental rush can give useful glimpses so it might be good to do it occasionally but keep it rare and mostly work slowly. Don't hope for too good, your success can only be as good as your previous experience allow.

    -- General state.
    It is been said time enough, but once more can never harm: if health, lack of rest, state of mind, level of stress, things on your mind, medication, comfort or environment is in the way... then success will range from poor to zero. Let's not be surprised. Either give up, take session merely for relaxing or solve the goddamn problems before.

    -- Energy.
    The more you have the more potential. If you have too much the potential might be wasted by your incapacity to relax in the hurricane. If you have too little... Well little potential, little results. Many ways to be energized, healthy and happy life is one, some often advertise the "no ejac" method (which I think is great only on the condition you have tons of sexual practices during the same time). Must be many others. Can't think of it right now.

    -- Capacity to deal with energy.
    This can mean many things and taking tantra or taoist sexuality lessons might be richer and all as relevant as what I am about to say, but I prefer to keep it simple now. Energy as mentioned just above (or sexual energy, or orgasmic energy, etc) can sometimes be more than you can handle without tensing or even panicking. But if you can learn to handle higher and higher levels of desire, arousal and sexual tension in the right way (in short: the welcoming way) you can enjoy more and in turn kick more energy in, thus pushing back the limits further and further. On the other hand if you are poor at this any energy will be too much (think premature ejaculation). So you need to train in this (be it in your sessions or outside... once again the "stop flow of urine" exercise comes to mind... also yoga... not to mention the energetic arts)

    -- Capacity for relaxation.
    It's more or less a brand of the above. But it is so important it is worth mentioning on its own. Your sessions are as good as your capacity for relaxation is. So work on this. Learn what relax is. Learn to identify how relaxed you are. Learn how to relax. Learn how to relax more. These things most people have completely wrong. So be humble, take time and learn. Once again yoga can help. So does meditation. I'll try and give a few tips of my own later (have at least one in mind named "this is not relaxing"). No relaxation capacity no good session. This wont change overnight by saying "ok I relax".

    -- Capacity to focus.
    Mental work, visualization, self hypnosis, meditation, mental stimulation. All you can do will be helpful. If you can't focus you will be left only with muscle frenzy to take you to a mechanical orgasm... A penile one... And not even the best... Good bye superO, no need of aneros. So work on this. Learn to focus on one thing only. Learn to not get lost in the mental noise. Learn to make sense from the sensory noise. Learn to isolate sensation or even create/shape it from sensory noise. Learn to deepen the focus (suppress awareness of the rest). Learn to lengthen focus. Learn to pin point focus on two things at the same time. Learn to focus on multiple things. Etc... There is a minimum of focus capacity without which anerosing is just a dream. Sure your capacity varies, but your general level at it determines how good a session can be. So train... Good thing is sessions can be a great way to train... And training can be a great way to session.

    -- The setting.
    Now this is the one that's easier to enhance I think. And there is no need for months of practice except some little trial and error. Think comfortable, dim light, calm, no interruption, romantic, good smell, calming audio sensorial cues or arousing ones (or both?). Cleopatra is your role model for choosing and enjoying great intimate setting. (Sorry a little out of ideas on this one, typing for too long)

    -- Love.
    Go figure by yourself.

    Phew, I'm done now... !
  • TurnrowTurnrow
    Posts: 156
    You didnt confuse me, Canacan. But I am glad to see you clarify "keep pleasure low" as an avenue to getting past the plateau and working to get out of a dead end. Those are common traps for us guys seeking the rewiring.

    Thanks for trying to help me and all the "seekers" of the rewiring.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    @Turnow You are welcome.

    I believe by sharing ideas intended at helping ourselves first, we might find resonnances, different points of view, corrections, and more... It then is beneficial to all.

    Trying to word it so others can understand it too also helps me make better sense of it... And gives better chance I remember and understand again reading back later on when things have changed (as they seemingly always do).
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Keeping store of the good stuff: a breathing exercise in Euphemistic's blog and reminder to do some archives of the Society for Sacred Sexuality website before some of its precious insights goes offline again (yes I already posted a link before, but saw it dead yesterday).

    - Breathing meditation - revised (by @euphemistic)
    (If I may, I would even copy-paste, but wouldn't it be against the rules?)

    - The Society for Sacred Sexuality (website and forum by Gary Joseph)
    (set of links to be later on modified and enhanced to keep mainly the most relevant infos to me)
    (The site as a whole is a bit repetitive and long to read as some informations are hammered again and again... But it makes it that you can read any subject without previous understanding and still make sense of it)
    .Main page:
    .Forum (aka Learning Center) (where most of the stuff is):
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Canacan said:

    - Your session is as good as your preparation allows... No more
    Why am I not doing better? What am I doing wrong? Well... This is missing the big picture. If the preparation is wrong, no matter the knowledge and effort... It will fail.

    I finaly came to understand how there actually are apparent exceptions to that rule.

    The idea is still right and useful indeed. But it is missing elements explaining the isolated exceptionnaly good sessions that take you by surprise. And ackowledging them is important, because they would make you believe you have reached a higher level than you actually have, consequently missing the point of the "session only as good as preparation allows" and ending up frustrated by the incapacity to reproduce the success (not realising it's normal). So for now lets just say there are accidental abnormally good sessions.

    There was a discussion about that in chat. Though I think I faced disagreement with the term, I like to call it "the panic arousal effect". (I like the drama flair of it)... More on that as I find time to edit the chat transcript.

  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,423
    Canacan said:

    -- For no particular reason, I think of muscle awareness and strength first.
    The most efficient training for me is all variations of the "stop flow of urine". With different positions and situations, different strength and duration of hold and release (until my favorite "drop by drop"). This was pivotal in my progress as it is what taught me to control my reaction to strong urges. At first it was barely bearable. The bonus of these exercices is they are intensly pleasurable. Kegel exercices on the other hand bore me to death and don't do so much to me.

    I know Mantak Chia recommends this technique in his book and @Buster called it An absolute MUST read! in his thread but I'd like to point out @nervetweak 's cautionary post and @darwin 's followup posts in that thread. Starting and stopping urine flow is not a recommended practice for maintaining healthy urinary function and I would urge you to cease that practice immediately. Kegel exercises may seem boring but they do benefit you without causing potential damage (actually I think they are very nice adjuncts for creating Anerosless sessions).

    You may find @darwin 's thread Kegel aerobics helpful in this respect.
    image Good Vibes to You ! image

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    @Rumel Thank you so much!
    Everything in one place, all the links I'd want.
    You don't disappoint.
  • PommiePommie
    Posts: 1,008
    surely, "starting and stopping urine flow" is simply a method for identifying the PC muscle group - nothing more and nothing less!
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I am getting the hang of my "stay low" mantra. I am learning to enjoy less and to enjoy it more and more. This is how I progress now. It changes my life in deeper ways. And the progresses are now more consistant and solid, even though I often don't realise there is progress. I am slowly getting rid of the concept of disapointing sessions
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Notes for myself and later.

    -- Sometime ago, instinctively switched from watching at porn as a peeping tom to experiencing it from the actors and actresses point of view. I tend to feel what they feel instead of the excitement of watching. Going inside. Downside : often they don't have that much fun. The foreplay tends to become my favorite and the orgasms (when genuine).

    -- The basics : fear, pain, sadness ... Shy away from it implies shy from pleasure, shy from life. Intensity and negativity don't change the nature of the core principles. I hope to identify and understand them better later on and give them other names more suitable for communication. Until then, this negative form is the easiest and strongest reminder. I personnaly don't see them as negative but mainly intense.
    (Basics for the aneros journey, for my human experience, keys to the O, something else?)
    I already forgot what they were for except they were important and all there is to say about something. Must just keep remembering them, the rest will come in time. Good thing, they are so damn easy to remember.
    ... Some tryouts : fear (arousal, panic, desire), pain (pleasure), sadness (love, joy)
    One word (or concept) might be missing... Sweetness. Not sure where it goes. Is it one of the three?
    Also... How's breath connected with this all? Not like breath wasn't a huge subject!

    -- I mostly refrained from writing vizualization stuff. Not sure why. These are what works best with me. People writing them are a huge inspiration (thanks Pan, Zaneblue, AneRico and others). I can just tune in what they write for instant effect. Damn, why don't I read more of it? And why am so unconfortable writing the same? (tend to do it more in the chat room but often with excessive detail)
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,255
    Read the descriptions here over and over "orgasm so intense I cry with pleasure" so saying a super o isn't what t is or isn't 'super' is universal
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    @Inhope I'm sorry, what you wrote is unclear to me. Can you rephrase?
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Just registering progress :

    First a-less miniOs this morning...
    ...and in various intensity's... Got the intuition of a dryO not too far... Always unsure with this thing).
    None of what worked before works again. In fact every technique is worth one session and no more. Getting used to it. Also getting used to the sensations. Knowing what to expect makes it much easier.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Oh my god, dryO chairgasms.
    Couldn't get dryOs in my bed this morning, now have them while trying to work... well not even trying to work but actually working (and listening to music). Does this all help?
    Feeling Pwaves, they make me tense, I relax... and here it goes.

    Must keep up working, really. But had to stop to register this. Amazing, great!

    (maybe I was influenced by AneRico's last blog entry : "A session" > )
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Actually they kept going all day. Not strong but still there.
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,255
    Every post you made cancan is mirroring my day so far. In bed right now and still 'orgasming' or,p waves or 'something' how am I to sleep?
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    @inhope I am glad you seem to begin finding your marks with this. Not always easy to position ourselves.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I don't know if it is related, but here is a documentary about a condition I can't help thinking about.
    I must warn you, this is not arousing.
    I'll be very much interested by your comments. Depending on your reactions we may start a separate subject.

    A Hundred Orgasms A Day

    54min - Description:

    A Hundred Orgasms A Day follow the story of 3 women who were tormented every hour of everyday with the need to have orgasm. This documentary explain how Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome or PSAS causes this unusual condition. PSAS is a little know neurological disorder where women have symptoms of continuous uncontrollable genital arousal. This condition is unrelated to any kind of sensations of sexual desire.

    PSAS was initially documented by Doctor Sandra Leiblum in mid 2001, just recently recognized as a unique syndrome in medical science which has a comparable equivalent progressively more claimed by men.

    A few physicians makes use of the name Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome to reference the disorder in women; some others look at the syndrome of priapism in adult males to be a similar disorder.

    Most importantly, it is really not connected with hyper-sexuality, also known as nymphomania. Both hyper-sexuality, and nymphomania are not known diagnosable health conditions. Not only is it very rare, the disorder is also seldom reported by affected individual who may think it is embarrassing.

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    This PSAS (persistant sexual arousal syndrom) would be related (i read somewhere) with Pudendal nerve entrapment.

    The pudendal nerve itself sounds like an interesting subject to us anerosers.

    I feel for these poor women like I couldn't possibly express. I keep wondering if maybe we hold a piece of the puzzle... Could we help?
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    The constant state of dryOing whenever I relax lasted for some 48 hours. Then it was only miniOing for 24 hours. Only sleep would leave me in peace. Not complaining, it was delicious and very instructive, though quite invasive, really. Then nothing, back to normal. And I have (like before with the persistant Pwaves) this paradoxical sensation of calm, relief and dispointment. "What?! I can't do it anymore?"... Well, no hurry boy...
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Linking another advice that helped me a lot so far. The Tao of Aneros :

    Pasting the most important part :
    rumel said:

    The Tao of Aneros - User Theorems
    • Orgasmic success is inversely proportional to one's level of expectation.
    • Orgasmic success is proportional to one's level of arousal.
    • Orgasmic success can not be forced or coerced to occur.
    • Orgasmic success is proportional to the level of mind/body relaxation.
    • Orgasmic success can begin anywhere along the erotic spectrum.
    • Orgasmic success is the gift of awakened body/mind energies.
    • Orgasmic success can be triggered or amplified by multiple stimuli.
    • Orgasmic success is dependent on trust in body and mind.
    • Orgasmic success is proportional to internal body language receptiveness.
    • Orgasmic success is affected by all life choice practices.
    • Orgasmic success is proportional to one's level of patience.
    • Orgasmic success is achieved following your own unique path.

    If you can morph your expectations into intentions,
    if you can morph your anxiety into patience,
    if you can morph your demands into desires,
    if you can morph your mind noise into a mind mantra,
    then you're ready for a Super-O to morph into you.

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Some basic advice for beginners I gave in chat and might want to give again (or refine).

    [19:02:15] Canacan: 3 things to understand:
    [19:03:14] Canacan: your body AND mind must get used to this as it evolves... So really no hurry or you'll have a hard time adjusting
    [19:04:46] Canacan: second, the goal is to learn to enjoy more when there is less... The intensity of your enjoyment and capacity to relax into it is the key... This takes focus, good mindset and time...
    [19:06:58] Canacan: (i know it is hard to make sense of this one... So one advice which might help :... "Whatever it is, savour it like it was the second coming"... Or for short : "savour!")
    [19:07:57] Canacan: third, your session is very heavily influenced by everything that happened before, and less by what you are conciously doing during it
    [19:10:53] Canacan: so for short, basic advice:
    [19:11:02] Canacan: be safe, be prepared, savour

    Put another way:
    - make sure you are at ease with what happens
    - lower your expectations and highten your experience... In the instant you are powerless
    - learn to savour what is here like you already had gems in your hands

    Be safe / Be Prepared / Savour

    This wont solve any complex equation or make people reach results faster than other. Just very basic and easy to understand advice, anybody can and, I think, should hear before they start. I would perfectly understand anybody complaining for not being told this. So here it was, said it.

    On the "be safe" aspect, you can also read this blog entry from AneRico appropriatefully (and funnily) named "Mind the Gap":
    Money quote: "The mystic swims in that which the psychotic is drowning"
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Ok some comedy for a change (this is portrayed by actors, not the most realistic, but so funny):

    TLC's 'Sex Sent Me to the ER' - 3 Hour Orgasm - (extract only)
    Pleasure turns to panic and minutes into hours, as Liz tries everything she can to stop this ...

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Re thinking the definition of orgasm... Working out in progress. First ideas:
    (as always saying hazardous experimental stuff like it was the truth... you should know better than taking it too seriously)

    [21:36:10] Canacan: i think the usual definition of orgasm is very wrong
    [21:36:51] Canacan: an orgasm isn't a peak, a resolution or even an event... It is a process
    [21:37:19] Canacan: all the confusion comes from the ejaculation i guess
    [21:37:59] Canacan: i discovered even a traditional orgasm starts long before the ejaculation
    [21:40:29] Canacan: I think orgasms are physical and mental... Or maybe these are not the right terms... I explain:
    [21:41:19] Canacan: there are two "ingredients" for a process to qualify as orgasm
    [21:43:24] Canacan: first the involuntary aspect... An orgasm is taking over control... Seemingly irrepressibly building (though they tend to be repressible actually... But they are not produce of the will)
    [21:47:31] Canacan: As the intensity of the sensations is getting higher and higher, many side effects can be experienced such as increased heart beat rate and more funky stuff
    [21:47:40] Canacan: second the judgmental aspect... An orgasm is "considered" an orgasm... It is a sensation that is enjoyed, one takes pleasure and relief in experiencing... And as such, is accompanied with gratifying hormone rushes
    [21:49:02] Canacan: the very same physical manifestation could perfectly not be an orgasm because the person is not accepting it mentally... And could then be more like panic attack or something
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    On the same subject, I really like ZaneBlue's hint for females: "clitoral orgasm is like a sneeze, vaginal orgasm is like a shiver".

    I wish I was told before, it would have spared me the huge misconception.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I don't know who's reading this (except future me, undoubtly and with good reason, "Hello me! Doing good?") but here it is, never mind the readership, what I think to be good info I should spread.

    AneRico's last blog entry made me read again some stuff I didn't really get the first time.

    I think this is a must read (especially for advanced members here):

    Did I say "MUST"?... Yes i did. Really!

    Not totally sure what it is worth... But at the very least a lot of thoughts before the eventual discard or remix or anything. Feel free to comment here or create another subject.
  • Theme_GasmTheme_Gasm
    Posts: 776
    @Canacan --- Great info! It speaks for itself!

  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,423

    I'll join @Theme_Gasm in saying the link to Positive Disintegration is a great piece of information. It certainly explains my movement going from Dabrowski's Level II to Level III and movement toward Level IV. While I know there will plenty of newbies who won't "get it" now, in time as their Aneros use leads them into their erotic meditations the veil will be lifted.
    image Good Vibes to You ! image
  • Theme_GasmTheme_Gasm
    Posts: 776
    I'm going to have to read it a couple of times myself! Interesting view of how we develop!

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    @rumel & @Theme_Gasm Thanks for the feed back.
    Please feel free to elaborate here or on a new subject if you prefer.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Okay I promised to post this... This is a mess for now. But I'd rather put it in the open as soon as possible. I'll edit the transcript and comment, clarify and synthesize later on.

    From what I recall there were three interesting subjects (though not all fully developed):
    - easing Pwaves
    - what is pain and what is pleasure
    - panic arousal

    So here it goes for now. Feel free to comment.

    [23:33:33] Canacan: ‹@nerve› its not fading... The more i try to suppress it (i unconsciously do all the time) the most intense they get... Actually, maybe if i manage to relax they will stop or i end up Oing (i dont want that)
    [23:34:29] nerve: ‹@Canacan› shift your something else...supressing it is focusing on it
    [23:35:08] Canacan: ‹@nerve› well my focus was on the chat... Didn't change a thing
    [23:35:12] nerve: ‹@Canacan› CHAIRGASM..........
    [23:36:14] devajones: ‹@nerve› ok i'll try i'm trusting you
    [23:36:26] Canacan: ‹@nerve› but if i orgasm they'll get worse!
    [23:36:31] nerve: ‹@Canacan› no.... chat will focus your attention on it...I mean something else...example when I practise piano focus is on that
    [23:37:19] nerve: ‹@devajones› I'm honored...
    [23:37:59] Canacan: ‹@nerve› seems i found the off button
    [23:38:18] nerve: ‹@Canacan› which is......?
    [23:38:28] kaiju5x: i found my off button, its pain... and it hurts
    [23:38:43] kaiju5x: or should I say... Burn
    [23:38:50] nerve: ‹@kaiju5x› thats a bit extreme......
    [23:38:52] Canacan: One variety of relax mind breathing associated with an emotion
    [23:39:11] kaiju5x: yeah thats the worst way for sure
    [23:39:16] kaiju5x: brb
    [23:39:49] Canacan: ‹@kaiju5x› not for me... Since working on pwaves EVERY sensation is potential for pleasure... Including pain
    [23:40:03] devajones: ‹@kaiju5x› the lube again???
    [23:40:10] fun1: User entered the chat room.
    [23:40:21] devajones: ‹@fun1› wb
    [23:41:43] Canacan: (which actually is good cause it eases the pain and protects the body from negative reaction to pain (itching, scratching, tensing et all) solving some of the stress induced pains)
    [23:41:57] nerve: ‹@Canacan› so if I hit you on the head with a'd enjoy that
    [23:42:07] Canacan: ‹@fun1› wb
    [23:42:17] Canacan: ‹@nerve› try it
    [23:42:33] Canacan: (hides behind his iPad)
    [23:42:48] nerve: ‹@Canacan› only if you'd enjoy it
    [23:43:57] Canacan: i dont enjoy a hit... But when in pain I'll deal with it by riding it like a pwave... Eventually getting pleasure in the process
    [23:44:43] Canacan: ‹@nerve› didn't you ever experience that?
    [23:45:14] nerve: ‹@Canacan› nope pain is pain oooowwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    [23:45:30] Canacan: (even in this sex asylum i am not normal )
    [23:45:49] nerve: ‹@Canacan› if you can do that you are gifted
    [23:45:49] euphemistic: ‹@Canacan›
    [23:46:17] Canacan: ‹@nerve› depends on the intensity and your capacity to enjoy said intensity... Sex is pain
    [23:46:53] nerve: ‹@Canacan› that means you are not doing it right....does everyone agree with that ?
    [23:47:30] Canacan: ‹@nerve› i am gifted alright... But i am sure everybody is the same only the levels of intensity and the moral changes
    [23:48:38] Canacan: ‹@nerve› sex is not painful because of the hormone rush... Try rape and you'll see how painful it is when you don't ride it
    [23:48:51] nerve: ‹@devajones› what about the female sex pain ?
    [23:49:01] Canacan: life is pain
    [23:49:13] Canacan: and life is also orgasmic
    [23:49:30] devajones: ‹@nerve› .hmmmmmm is sex pain
    [23:49:42] nerve: ‹@Canacan› you've lost me...and thats sayin something
    [23:49:44] devajones: sex can be pain
    [23:49:56] devajones: rape scenario is a good one because that is definitely painful
    [23:50:03] devajones: nothing about rape feels good
    [23:50:04] nerve: ‹@devajones› mean you are not doin it right
    [23:50:08] Canacan: we are registering sensations either as pain or pleasure... But all in all this a moral choice
    [23:50:16] devajones: however i've had concensual sex that was painful
    [23:50:38] devajones: ‹@nerve› overall i do not equate sex to pain
    [23:50:56] nerve: ‹@devajones› me niether
    [23:50:57] Canacan: sensations are just intense or not
    [23:51:00] devajones: most of the time is is all pleasure...outside of when i'm being spanked or flogged...however that type of pain results in heightened pleasure
    [23:51:15] devajones: anal sex can be pain if not done correctly
    [23:51:51] nerve: its a good point...pain and pleasure both stimulate the nerves and engage the brain
    [23:51:53] devajones: [][][][]]
    [23:51:59] devajones: ]\\9?"ikioolkokok;lpl;'[
    [23:52:10] Canacan: ‹@devajones› all you say is proving my point...except maybe i didnt phrase it well
    [23:52:20] nerve: ‹@devajones› whoose flogging you now
    [23:52:35] nerve: ‹@Canacan› and I agree with you too
    [23:52:55] devajones: ooppss sory
    [23:52:57] devajones:
    [23:53:03] devajones: cleaning keyboard
    [23:53:20] nerve: ‹@devajones› thats funny
    [23:53:21] devajones: ‹@nerve› lmao i'm flogging the keyboard apprently
    [23:53:24] Canacan: ‹@nerve› exactly... Pleasure is when you enjoy it, pain when you dont... The nerves are not responsible, the brain is
    [23:53:32] nerve: edr5u6v p9;ybp 8ov y[; 9ub ]
    [23:53:35] nerve: -[9hbb 6y75ri ulo ty8;9 vy8l97v 87ot c64tyi8o-]
    [23:53:38] nerve: 09- n
    [23:54:01] nerve: ‹@Canacan› are you sayin I'm not responsible
    [23:54:23] Canacan:
    [23:54:31] kaiju5x: pain
    [23:54:39] nerve: ‹@nerve› secret coded message to FBI
    [23:54:42] kaiju5x: is not pleasure
    [23:54:44] kaiju5x:
    [23:55:11] nerve: both stimulate nerve(s)
    [23:55:16] devajones: ‹@nerve i will say the only time consensual sex was painful was after i'd been going at it too long...thats not a good idea
    [23:55:36] nerve: ‹@devajones› binging huh
    [23:56:17] Canacan: Take anything pleasurable to you...then augment the intensity, past a certain point it becomes pain... This is your level of tolerance
    [23:56:38] nerve: ‹@Canacan› OK I'll buy that....
    [23:56:57] kaiju5x: ‹@Canacan› btw masturbating and not ejac causes some pain too
    [23:57:37] nerve: ‹@kaiju5x› yeah rub yourself raw....
    [23:57:45] Canacan: take anything painful, lower the intensity, past a certain point you can choose to enjoy it
    [23:58:42] devajones: ‹@nerve› more like other people binging on me
    [23:58:49] Canacan: yes you are all describing sex that is painful... Sex is intense, it is painful without all the lube arousal and hormones
    [23:58:53] Turnrow: User entered the chat room.
    [23:58:59] nerve: ‹@Canacan› thats interesting...I got burnt the other day from microwaved water....hurt like hell
    [23:59:08] Turnrow: Hey bros
    [23:59:20] devajones: ‹@Turnrow› hey here
    [23:59:37] devajones: ‹@nerve› where were you putting this "water"
    [23:59:40] Canacan: ‹@Turnrow› hey
    [23:59:40] Turnrow: just checking to see what you all are discussing
    [23:59:53] devajones: ‹@Turnrow› how painful sex really is
    [00:00:07] kaiju5x: ‹@Turnrow› hi
    [00:00:12] Canacan: what makes things painful or not is the brain... Scientifically proven
    [00:00:14] Turnrow: thats a BIG topic........LOL
    [00:00:45] kaiju5x: how did it get so scientific?
    [00:00:54] nerve: ‹@devajones› it just spilled as I was removing it...really nothing kinky here
    [00:01:10] devajones: ‹@nerve› damn
    [00:01:21] devajones: ‹@nerve› thought you were trying to cook sperm while still in the testes
    [00:01:57] nerve: ‹@devajones› entered the chat room.
    [00:02:07] Turnrow: ‹@Canacan› Thanks for including our conversation in your thread.
    [00:02:11] Canacan: when i first touched my prostate it was painful... Because the sensation is intense, i didnt recognise it and was afraid i hurt myself... Then today... Well you know the rest of the story
    [00:02:17] devajones: ‹@nerve›
    [00:02:20] kaiju5x: ‹@devajones› testes in the microwave? omg...
    [00:02:21] devajones: ‹@steveg95928› hey there
    [00:02:39] devajones: ‹@Canacan› gspot stimulation at first was painful for me as well
    [00:02:52] Turnrow: ‹@steveg95928› Hello
    [00:02:53] steveg95928: ‹@devajones› MS Jones... hows it going???
    [00:02:58] devajones: ‹@Canacan› it took a while for it to register as pleasure...however i think there were a number of factors involved in that
    [00:03:04] steveg95928: ‹@Turnrow› hi there..
    [00:03:07] devajones: ‹@steveg95928› fine how is it going for you?
    [00:03:14] Canacan: ‹@Turnrow› your most welcome
    [00:03:32] Turnrow: Gotta run guys...........too many obligations
    [00:03:36] Turnrow: User left the chat room.
    [00:03:42] steveg95928: ‹@devajones› excellent thanks... just enjoying the day... chatting... whipping up some p waves....
    [00:03:48] devajones: lawyers
    [00:03:56] devajones: ‹@steveg95928› i see
    [00:04:37] steveg95928: ‹@devajones› on the patio on a lounge with the laptop...
    [00:04:43] Canacan: ‹@devajones› see? You register it at pain or pleasure... Pain or pleasure is not in the nature of the sensation... Its nature is mostly more or less intense to the nerves
    [00:05:19] devajones: ‹@steveg95928› sounds scenic
    [00:05:21] Canacan: ‹@steveg95928› hello
    [00:05:35] nerve: ‹@Canacan› whats intense to me ?
    [00:05:47] aneros_2010: User entered the chat room.
    [00:06:22] Canacan: ‹@nerve› your pain from the hammer
    [00:06:25] aneros_2010: ‹@Canacan› Hey
    [00:06:35] Canacan: ‹@aneros_2010› hey
    [00:06:53] nerve: ‹@Canacan› told you I'd only hit you if you ashed for it
    [00:07:11] Canacan: ‹@nerve› i didnt ash
    [00:07:13] Guest1: User entered the chat room.
    [00:07:22] aneros_2010: riding my helix syn here
    [00:07:33] Canacan: ‹@aneros_2010› enjoy!
    [00:08:08] aneros_2010: ‹@Canacan› Feels sooooo good!!!
    [00:09:26] nerve: well peeps been a thrill as always but I got to get on with my day
    [00:10:54] devajones: ‹@nerve› bye
    [00:11:02] nerve: toodles
    [00:11:17] devajones:
    [00:11:21] kaiju5x: ‹@nerve› see ya
    [00:11:36] devajones: ‹@kaiju5x› how was your food?
    [00:11:40] Canacan: interesting subject this pain/pleasure... Actually it is a question of level of comfort... Key issue with plateau effect and rewiring... To me getting to the superO is learning to get comfortable enough with higher intensity of pleasure... But as pleasure isnt that different from pain, as intensity rises you find it harder to relax because you fear pain (more or less, i simplify)
    [00:12:05] kaiju5x: ‹@devajones› was not filling enough
    [00:12:09] devajones: ‹@Canacan› makes sense
    [00:13:15] Canacan: ‹@devajones› of course it does because I'm right ... Am i not always? LMAO
    [00:14:20] Canacan: the effect as been coined here "terror at the gates"
    [00:14:39] Canacan: a sense of panic when nearing the orgasm
    [00:17:05] kaiju5x: yeah that makes perfect sense
    [00:18:36] euphemistic: User entered the chat room.
    [00:19:03] Canacan: also I noticed when i discover new levels of pleasure there is both panic and arousal from panic... The panic often taking over and killing all... But if you manage to regain enough control pleasure takes over and you get real high... Which might explain the early success some get at very first experience... And then no more for a long time
    [00:19:51] twlltin: User entered the chat room.
    [00:19:57] twlltin: hi folks
    [00:20:20] questOr: User entered the chat room.
    [00:20:38] Canacan: ok... My brain is going to over heat... I'd better get out... And BRING BACK FOOD
    [00:20:45] Canacan: ‹@twlltin› hi
    [00:20:57] questOr: Hi gang
    [00:21:00] twlltin: ‹@Canacan› food!
    [00:21:05] twlltin: ‹@questOr› hi
    [00:21:20] questOr: ‹@twlltin› Hey
    [00:21:56] devajones: ‹@twlltin› well hey there
    [00:22:06] devajones: ‹@questOr› wb
    [00:22:16] devajones: ‹@kaiju5x› you are a growing man
    [00:22:16] twlltin: ‹@devajones› Hello there, lady!
    [00:22:45] questOr: ‹@devajones› It's great to be back!
    [00:24:32] Canacan: ... Any way... Maybe with all that I convinced you pain is judgmental and apart from that a simple question of intensity (your body being strong enough to be comfortable with it... Slap a fly, it dies, slap a human bottom you may get moans)
    [00:24:44] devajones: ‹@questOr› dont you brighten up a room?

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Here is a quote i don't want to forget :

    rumel said:

    [2014-06-11 23:53:17] rumel: ‹@Guest1› Tingling & buzzing are certainly good signs your body is responding to the presence of your Aneros device, perhaps it would be better to think of these as elements of your prostate awakening rather than discrete "steps". The Aneros journey is not always linear, forward but often times seems stagnant or even retrograde, but don't be fooled by this you are always learning something even when you are not consciously aware of it.

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    And here is another :

    AneRico said:

    As I see it you want to let go of ALL expectations.  You insert the Aneros and become a "Pleasure Detective" ; you work to develop your Witness Consciousness.  You become a keen observer of what is going on with your body and your sensations.  VERY MINOR contractions or better...none at all.  You are 'all about' watching, sensing, detecting, witnessing.  You are all about quieting your mind and observing.  You are all about discovering any muscle tension and relaxing scan again and again and again...each time you sense tension you gently relax it again.

    In an older post you mentioned your awareness of 'energy' in your pelvis.  Let's call that your Root Chakra.  I would suggest you 'witness' that energy during your sessions.  Is it present?  can you 'grow' it?  can you spread it? (using mental focus only, no muscle tension, no clenching/contracting to get it to do what you want).

    It sounds like a contradiction but you seek pleasure by expecting nothing.  You are relaxing deeply and observing (like I said; Pleasure Detective).  You simply note what comes up for you and if pleasure starts up, you relax through that as well.  

    Each session you benefit from prostate massage, time spent with self, time spent honoring self, benefits from relaxation/meditative experience.  You develop your inner senses as well as an appreciation for yourself and your wonderful human form.  It is incredibly valuable time, spent well.  Keep that in mind.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I knew it!

    How giving birth can cause an orgasm: Study finds release of hormones during delivery can push some women to ecstasy
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Refining my "stay low" mantra. Wording it differently for now. 

    The Aneros journey for me, short version:
    Do less, get less, enjoy more 

    The larger journey version:
    Do less, get less, acknowledge more

    I don't know whoever else it might help. But for me it is invaluable.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    This thread is a mess... I should someday try to correct the underdevelopped and reorganise some of the thoughts... But still, it is extremely useful for me to read again sometimes.

    More may come when mind becomes clearer about the new stuff.

    Meanwhile please read it all, I am more than open to comments, criticisms and demands for clarifications... All the more because I am aware that they are very much needed on many points.

    Love to all
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Recently I created a thread with the following opening :

    Canacan said:

    Looking for Magic Button(tm) to the best orgasm ever... Or how to entirely miss the point.

    I think only explorers get the benefit, and the benefit is better connection with oneself and the world and more enjoyment of life.
    To me, THIS is orgasmic.

    All shortcuts, tricks and (vibrating) devices are just distractions.
    Uncovering a shortcut can be cool and fun - taking someone else's most likely is an illusion.

    You can here read the responses :

    But what I'd like now is to comment on the last part of my quote, that there is no shortcut. Well after all I think there is a shortcut. But this shortest of shortcuts is... Aneros and we are all taking it already. Ask any tantrist, practionner of chi-kung or sex therapist, what we achieve here takes ages and hard work for all the others.

    Trying to shorten the shortcut is asking a bit too much.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Extract from a chat transcript :
    (A bit experimental as always)

    Canacan said:

    dauntless mind, dauntless heart and dauntless body climb the ladder of pleasure in full acceptance of the state of fear

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I keep finding this "zone" and then forgetting the essential mindstate... so here are links to some of the best indicators:

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Well, as soon as I nail it, I will have to refine the description of what is "the zone" for me and how to reach it... as it seems to be the master key and it seems to differ from others' description.

    Analogy hints : dizzyness, vasovagal episode, hypnagogic state, alcohol induced disinihibition, falling backwards, unplugging some part of the mind that consequently plugs you fully to another, tuning in... 

    (list to be edited)
  • brinebrine
    Posts: 301

    I LOVE reading your musings. Not only are they full of wisdom, humor, and intriguing ideas. They give an insight into the mindfulness of your thought processes. 

    Keep 'em coming, pal!

  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632

    Thanks, it is very much appreciated. :)
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I tried today in the chat to explain how the concept of worship now comes into play in my constantly renewed view of the world and, in this particular case, human behavior.

    My understanding isn't even at early draft stage. So for now clearing just a few basic conception or misconception is the maximum I can do publicly.

    Let's say we could see common human actions as performing rituals with the unconscious goal of worshipping male or female universal principles (or divinities).

    I think this specific quote seems pretty good :
    "Worship is communion with your own inner spiritual ideal."

    Gary Joseph - Society for Sacred Sexuality

    Another hint : slutiness may be seen as one sort (among many) of worship/celebration of the divine feminine.
  • @Canacan

    Appreciate your willingness to open yourself up so that we can join the progression of your journey.  I enjoy your thought process and because I'm so new to all of this, appreciate and find inspiration to take back to my own experience/session/a-less practice.  Keep the thoughts and ideas coming!
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    I now feel confident fully resuming my journey after a long pause.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Waking up the mess for even more (doesn't some order in the middle of chaos sound like even more chaos ?).

    Tell me what you guys and girls think :
    (Interview of Danielle Crittenden)

  • @Canacan
    Interesting and informative! The video supports what I have suspected for quite sometime. This would explain some (but not all) of the dis- connect between men and women (in the US), in regard to marriage and dating relationships, etc. IMO
    Feminism has a bit to do with some (not all)
    US men allowing themselves to be emmasculated by their women. Most allow themselves to be manipulated, because of their fear of not getting any sex.

    Once their wife or SO realizes this fear... Hahaha! Hell comes to Frog Town. It is a sad day when I man is afraid to ask his woman for sex. It is a weak man that allows and makes excuses for his wife or SO denying him (if she is legitimately physically and mentally able) Mind you, I'm referencing men that are holding up their end of their relationship.

    Excellent post. It's quite thought provoking. Feminism has created quite a few bullocks. Then again, a closed mouth don't get fed. Even more so if a vagina is involved.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    Ok, i'm here basically copy-pasting somebody else's comment. But i don't want to risk losing the link or having the author delete it someday (like AneRico did with his). In short : it's great.

    JMchemist said:

    After reading many discussions on the rituals and hoops people jump through to have a SuperO, I thought I would give my two cents. My prior posts (the ones I originated) describe in detail my SuperO experience. From the responses I get I conclude that I've reached a very high high level (hate to call it a 'level' but the word will have to suffice) so maybe I can help others in their journey.

    My technique falls in the do nothing category but with very important mindset. In the beginning of the journey my sessions were mainly about inducing the involuntaries. I would focus on holding contractions until they took off on their own. Also, I would savor them and subconsciously hold them there even if it was a very slight hold. Here in lies the impediment to moving forward. If you focus on inducing the involuntaries and subsequently hold them then you are in essence controlling them. You must 'rewire' your mindset to the constant release of contractions. If you are in the midst of a contraction your goal should be to get it to release. It is a contradiction since the contraction feels so damn good.

    Main point- the SuperO lies in the release of the contraction. It is only in the non-contraction state that the full body energy can build to a SuperO. When the involuntaries let go and release, you should be able to feel the full body energy gather. Eventually, your higher chakras will send energy to the aneros instead of the aneros sending energy up.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 632
    This link was posted somewhere in the advanced subject "automatic tantra". But this convo is so full of information it doesn't stand a single chance shining there. So here it is for the less advanced users. Give it a read :

    Male control of ejaculation