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Consecutive dud sessions and ones response to them
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Ok i was making huge strives in my progress lately as some of you know (pretty much having a session a day for a week or so) and then i had a break of 1 day (i was tired and didn't want a session whilst not full 100%) i have had two lengthy sessions and i felt barely anything in my once very receptive and active prostate area.

    Not one of the techniques i employed previously, worked. I may feel a flutter or a period of something for a few seconds but ultimately nothing. Whats more i was very turned on indeed, so it wasn't a question of arousal or 'readiness' and ready for prostate play, even having some mild pwaves (very subtle, but notable)

    So my question is, and I'm sure someone has probably said it before to me, how do i view this? what do i think of this, how do i move past it without it becoming something that confuses and (slightly) upsets me? especially when i read a thread lower down the page that says "lots of orgasms etc" and each post is about how every session is a successful one. Its disheartening and dare i sound like an errant child, UNFAIR.


  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,389
    inhope said:

    So my question is, and I'm sure someone has probably said it before to me, how do i view this? what do i think of this, how do i move past it without it becoming something that confuses and (slightly) upsets me? especially when i read a thread lower down the page that says "lots of orgasms etc" and each post is about how every session is a successful one. Its disheartening and dare i sound like an errant child, UNFAIR.

    ACCEPTANCE,
    Life is unfair, life is messy, life is arbitrary, life is unpredictable, life is full of paradoxes.
    LET GO of neediness for all the answers and just enjoy what you have when you have it.
    ACCEPTANCE !
    image Good Vibes to You ! image

  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Thanks Rumel, i appreciate the honesty. My mother had another way of putting it; "lump it" which meant to just not moan or complain and just carry on. To accept it, as you have eloquently put it.

    This is something I've done all my life, so much so that i became withdrawn, taken out of all the experiences any joys of life as well as denying myself the rich pleasures hidden in plain sight. Life is unfair, you are right! but why should we f**king accept that? everyone just takes it, I've done it all my life, enough is enough i say! life should be what you make it, and I'm trying damn hard to make it awesome, even in spite of the bullies, the scumbags and the failures i have (so numerous now!)

    Seeking answers is still, i believe, right. We should never stop seeking the truth or questioning the world and experiences around us, its the lack of this that the world is in such a sorry state (well, sometimes!) and so many people bottle so much sh!t up in their lives, i would rather  be honest, even if its ugly or moaning or letting out tension. it may annoy people here and in life but i don't give a toss, ACCEPT it!

    Acceptance of this though is very challenging for me, I've learned that if i want something in life i need to go and get it, if something doesn't work try to identify why and solve it, its all the more sweeter when you overcome such an obstacle. I just wish some folk here were more considerate when posting about their experiences, some of us aren't as lucky and some of us want so badly to experience it.

    In 9 years i have never been able to accept that i may never have a dry O, the thirst is unquenchable!

    I know you hold back from replying to my posts rumel, but i know you are always watching, great to see you again :-) Anyways i digress....

    ACCEPTANCE ;-)
  • ineverknewineverknew
    Posts: 1,153
    @inhope, we all have duds, and its not always easy to identify why.  I have had many a dud session and being very aroused myself.  Again, ill tell you why, the prostate is a fickle BITCH!! LOL.  Take a day or two off and come back.  
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Yeah will do indeed, the why is puzzling but if thats the way it is, so be it. To those that never have dud sessions: post about it in your blogs not here, don't rub it in our faces. Ya sons of b!tches!
  • mdadmdad
    Posts: 139
    Yeah, duds happen. Sometimes when the sessions are duds, the after effects are still good. And that's when I practice my a-less skills.
  • Theme_GasmTheme_Gasm
    Posts: 756
    @inhope --- I hope you're kidding!

    TG
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Cool @mdad, not had that post dud session, but i guess its something to look forward to.

    @theme_gasm i will let you figure that one out :-)
  • ineverknewineverknew
    Posts: 1,153
    @inhope, I think, from reading some of your posts you seem to be getting too hung up on the "orgasm" part of this journey.  You also say things have been going very well and very pleasureable, why not enjoy those feelings for what they are so that whether or not you have an orgasm, you leave your session feeling good about it and not so frustrated?   I say this because frustration, jealousy, and wanting it too badly are all things that can ruin your enjoyment.  You need to eventually be at peace with the fact that although your sessions are pleasureable, they may not be orgasmic, and that should be just fine.  After you have mastered this, the orgasms will come.  One thing that has helped me understand this is edging.  Not sure if you have ever tried it, but it trains you and your mind to just enjoy pleasure with no orgasm.  I know it may seem sort of silly, but this pleasure you receive from an aneros is what develops into orgasmic feelings, so if you just dismiss them and seek only the orgasm you may be stifling your rewiring.  This comes from the aneros wiki:  

    Try not to orgasm

    This technique confronts a major obstacle to Aneros orgasm success, which is straining for an orgasm. With traditional stimulation, you can have some luck in forcing an orgasm to arrive. With MMO, this is the biggest roadblock. The orgasm must arrive naturally. Trying not to orgasm in the MMO context is similar to "edging" in standard masturbation, where you keep yourself on the cusp of orgasming. In MMO you notice and particularly enjoy the pleasure you are having, and try to stay right where you are with it. Doing so in fact often ratchets up the pleasure a notch. Try to stay there as well...

    I think if you try this, it will help with your frustrations.


  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Is that edging? what is it if not?

    Being so close to orgasm after a while is too much to bare, you must get that? also dud sessions where i feel nothing.. meh
  • ineverknewineverknew
    Posts: 1,153
    @inhope, i guess it depends on your intentions.  If you have a session intending on orgasm, then no.  Just because you have a session and have no orgasm, its not edging by default, its all about your intentions.  
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    My intention for sessions is to feel pleasure or at least something pleasurable at all. The truth is even feeling something is too much to expect for some, so there you are lying naked with a peice of plastic up your ass and nuthin happenin'. I got close several times to orgasm so much that when I stopped I cannot stop the urge to want it for hours, sometimes days. It's why I think I've been able to have sessions every day and feel something every day, in a sense one long session is what I've been experiencing.

    I'm convinced that having a break, 'ruins the streak ' as it were. I need 3 sessions in a row before I start to feel the potential of what I'm capable of feeling.

    Will try again soon, perhaps 2 days from now :-)
  • mdadmdad
    Posts: 139
    The "close to orgasm several times" comment tells me you are right where you want to be. I've posted about this before, and I think learning to enjoy being right in verge of orgasm is essential for the journey. Because, at least for me, the dry orgasm doesn't transition like a normal orgasm; it feels like "the edge", but a little stronger. The transition for me happens when I can stop trying, an stay close to orgasm without expending effort. Then I can sit back and enjoy that feeling of being close, nurture it, and make it stronger. So learn to work in that "close" zone, and I think you'll find so e peace there.

    As for the 3 day effects, yes, I've seen progress build on previous days, too. I'm limited by soreness, though, so I can't always repeat sessions for long.
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Hmm ok sounds good, to get to that edge level though takes days as I say, not one random session. I find that when I get to the edge, and relax ie do nothing I get huge surge of feeling and then it subsides, wonder what that is? I will keep going when I'm well relaxed but it's gonna be several consecutive sessions before I re awaken my prostate
  • ReWireReWire
    Posts: 27
    @inhope
    In response to your opening paragraph... I would suggest you find that flutter feeling and work on keeping it going as long as you can. After that, see if you can speed up the flutter. Then after that, ease off the flutter slightly till it stops buy keep the same mild contraction in place. My body then converts that energy of the flutter to a dry o. This is the process of my progress so far and it has let to multiple dry o's. No super o yet... but creating dry o's and stringing them is wild crazy. It is worth the persistence, the patience, and perseverance.
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Will,do retire. The flutter only happens when my legs are down, I think it pushes the inner muscles toward the device
  • TickleTickle
    Posts: 31
    Erm it sounds like you've been trying too hard and frustration has now set in which will do you no favours. Your story has similarities to mine but I don't tend to let frustration get the better of me, I just take things a day at a time. When I first started with the aneros things seemed very active in the prostate area and even without the aneros in there was this constant nervous sexual energy thing going on down there which is the only way I can explain it. Well over a year on from that and things have quietened down to just about nothing happening, a few little interesting vibes maybe at the most but certainly nothing of any similarity to some of the experiences posted on this forum. I have adopted the do nothing technique but the odd time I might do some voluntary contractions for the health benefit aspect of the aneros and don't forget this is a huge part of useing the aneros if you are getting on a bit like me, if not then it must still have good health benefits for muscle toning in the area and is also beneficial for those with haemoroids apparently. So the journey has pluses and minuses but at the end of the day I think you have to get this idea of there being a goal at the end of it, the super O or whatever you'd like to call it out of your head. Forget about it completely would be my advice and just carry on with a more relaxed attitude and don't push things as sooner or later something I'm sure will just click without too much control on your part. I think in your case and mine and many others that there's a lot of activity going on down there but wer'e not yet fully receptive to it due to certain nerve networks not yet set-up completely or the re-wiring process has still not been facilitated fully. I tell a lie, I did get frustrated but realised that it would be counter-productive and like yourself I read the many success stories on here which added fuel to the frustration but now I read them and think that this is what will happen to me some day, whether tomorrow or next year or 10 years it will happen. Stay cool.
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    I have stopped being frustrated, even today as i type this to you all on my 4th consecutive dud i am not frustrated, i am confused as to how lots of people here can have sessions after weeks of silence and generate pleasurable sensations -at all. Quite frankly it smells a little of the bull.

    I have a great mindset, no expectation, time to relax and just enjoy a bit of me time and 4 times i end up in the same place. 

    I don't mind anymore not getting close to an O but I've once again started to feel nothing, hardly what is described on the aneros packaging and all the people raving about how awesome it is, again a whiff of something nasty in the air...

    It will happen? why will it? do you believe this of yourself? i think this is something that is not true of a lot of people, you just don't realise it yet, though i am now accepting it.
  • TickleTickle
    Posts: 31
    I think if you see each session as a dud then you are putting too much expectation on the experience so sorry to disagree with your statement of not having any expectation. Again you're maybe expecting a result in some shape or form each time. How do you know it was a dud? things maybe happening on a level you're not yet aware of. If others are seeing results within weeks of starting then yes it maybe bull, maybe not but personally I don't read too much into them now but I did earlier on but again realised it was again counter-productive to any progress I might make. I'd rather be positive and have hope in something happening some day than a negative attitude. I think it's easy to become too analytical about it all and lose track altogether, instead of just going with it, if it happens then great, if not well I won't be losing sleep over it.  If you're not frustrated anymore then maybe it has developed into disappointment due to the aneros not doing what it 'says on the tin'. It's not like buying a bike for the first time when you were a kid, you know if you keep practicing you'll eventually get your balance and steer and pedal all at the same time without even thinking, it's more or less a certainty that this will happen if you keep at it. This is different and more uncertainty is involved as there's no blueprint to follow in order to experience 'the experience' if you will. I'm in the same boat as you and I think if I were you I'd stop reading alot of the posts from people who've had success with the aneros as I don't think it'll help you get anywhere, whether they're bull or not but I hope to one day read your success story on here. I wish you well.
  • Theme_GasmTheme_Gasm
    Posts: 756
    @Tickle --- I second your thoughts!

    TG
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    Of course you second his thoughts!

    But go on tell me, honestly, if you had lots of awesome sessions, tasted of heaven and then every session since you felt zilch: you cannot tell me you would be grateful? Or happy, or positive?

    My relaxation time is limited, precious and is a break from the stress of my life. If I get nothing from a session then yes, I'm going to be a little dissapointed, just as you would be.
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 548
    Maybe then instead of aneros session, use your precious time to take yoga and meditation courses. This will never be wasted time, will help you go through the stresses of life and keep you in good shape for a long healthy one. Once you progressed in this you might even find aneros much easier if you feel like trying again.

    If you are stressed and have little time, think useful.

    Just my opinion... (... but it's a good one... LOL)
  • inhopeinhope
    Posts: 1,119
    I already do martial arts, which have their forms of relaxation sessions (line a kata) my life is more busy than stressful I should have said that better.

    What I've tasted of the aneros, even though I've not orgasmed through it is too tempting / amazing to stop, I just wish the devices were better, or he science of this whole thing were better, or more accurate! I hate how it's orgasm city for some people and nothing for others. Come on aneros co. Do done research into this! Imagine if everyone orgasmed when using the aneros, think of the money!!

    It's not fair. There must fe balance. And f*ck those that say "life isn't fair or balanced" if you just accept that the world stays as the place that it is and there is no change. Those that challenge, or ask questions are the ones that make a difference and change the status quo, f*ck being another 'sheep' that just follows the flock.
  • PspotsquirterPspotsquirter
    Posts: 467
    @inhope
    No disrespect to you, but...THERE IS NOTHING WRONG ANY ANEROS DEVICE. NOR DOES THE SCIENCE OF ANEROS NEED TO BE MADE BETTER. ASK NOT WHAT YOUR ANEROS CAN DO FOR YOU! ASK WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR ANEROS!
  • Theme_GasmTheme_Gasm
    Posts: 756
    @inhope --- I really can't engage you in this kind of circular argument/discussion!

    However, I don't really believe there is one person on the forum who wants to see you frustrated or unsuccessful! That is how we try to help, and to keep our own focus positive for our own journey. Your success rests entirely with you and your willingness to make decisions about how to proceed.

    In my opinion, you can certainly continue to find your way through the forums and by asking questions! However, if all that leads to is continued failure, and feeling like you need to 'demand action' for the 'sake of fairness' you're success will be limited or negligible.

    Of course you'll make that decision because from what it sounds like, giving up is not in your play book, which is quite an admireable trait...under most circumstances!

    The other possibility, may be in this case, that rather than calling it "giving up", you consider it a period of rest for the sake of getting past a type of "writers block" if you will, where you've temporarily run out of ideas, and you can't "see the forest because the trees are in the way"...and just let your mind take a break from this whole thing!

    Wouldn't that be a better choice than your current path?

    TG
  • CanacanCanacan
    Posts: 548
    @Inhope I'll try and point all that to me indicates wrong state of mind in your message. Please understand no disrespect is meant. Only do it to help you see what is not working here. So you can eventually adapt.
    By the way, i don't mean to say I know the solution. As you once said this aneros thing might as well not be for you. It happens.

    "What I've tasted of the aneros, even though I've not orgasmed through it is too tempting / amazing to stop,"
    Too much is too much. Not enough self control. Craving and overreaching. Wrong direction. No luck.

    "I just wish the devices were better,"
    Nonsense. Fine tuning wont change their basic principle you both say you crave, can't exploit and want different. It is either "I want it", "i want something different" or "i know how to make this better". You need to decide.

    "or he science of this whole thing were better, or more accurate!"
    Wishing. Plus demanding the impossible. This is a wiki, an amateur free willing experimental contribution. No information can be perfect on a theme so intimate, poorly documented and so wildly varying between people.

    "I hate how it's orgasm city for some people and nothing for others."
    Hatred and jealousy. I am not judging, I don't have a problem with that. But this is 100% contradictory with the oh so needed state of mind identified as "just let go". Plus speaking of hate in a forum never brings good things. A little more consideration for your partners in research (and only people mildly knowledgable on the subject you might meet) my prove useful.

    "Come on aneros co."
    They are not reading you. You are just rambling.

    "Do done research into this!"
    They wont. Or to be exact they did all a company of that type can already. You can't expect them to finance a research facility where tons of people's experiences are being monitored and analyzed. This is touching multiple subjects science couldn't find enough budget and insight to make much light on.

    "Imagine if everyone orgasmed when using the aneros, think of the money!!"
    You are talking of a vibrator. This exists already. This is totally contradictory with the aneros principle if you understand it. We are talking slow sex and slight touch here. You couldn't be more wrong.

    "It's not fair."
    It is fair. Only you don't get it. Or don't accept it.

    "There must fe balance."
    Wishful thinking. You either have the power to make balance or you don't.

    "And f*ck those that say "life isn't fair or balanced""
    F*ck the wise, praise the foolish... What do you expect to learn with such mindset? Not to "just let go" I'm afraid... Too bad cause it is indeed a seemingly necessary mental key to unlock the neuro-muscular feedback making superO possible (with or without aneros and however imperfect they may be). The brain is a complex beast, you need the psychological mind tricks.

    "if you just accept that the world stays as the place that it is and there is no change."
    Going off chart. This is not the subject. Need more focus.

    "Those that challenge, or ask questions are the ones that make a difference and change the status quo,"
    Sometimes yes. Most of times no. The status quo is no subject here. You are being ideological and sentimental. The first being a burden here, the second probably being good on the condition you use it well.

    "f*ck being another 'sheep' that just follows the flock."
    Anarchist motto and insult in our face. Not helping.
    Also how can you complain the manual (the wiki here) isn't good enough if you also explain us you despise following one.

    I have the impression you are chasing daydreams with a hammer and asking for a pneumatic drill in hope of better results. The superO is probably very different from what you think. Getting hooked up on chasing ghosts is best way to get frustration. You probably got tricked by the usual mirage the plateau effect sends us while trying to rewire.

    I had some similar experience. Documented part of it in my journey thread. Rewiring asks from you to challenge your own ways, beliefs, self... Challenging the world is the lazy reaction and is not helping on this one.
  • PspotsquirterPspotsquirter
    Posts: 467
    This is better than Reality TV! As The Ass Does Not Fart. Genital Asspital. The Young And The Assless. When will this madness cease? It won't. It just grows and grows. I eagerly await the next episode. :-\"
  • Theme_GasmTheme_Gasm
    Posts: 756

    This is better than Reality TV! As The Ass Does Not Fart. Genital Asspital. The Young And The Assless. When will this madness cease? It won't. It just grows and grows. I eagerly await the next episode. :-\"



    LMAO

    TG
  • kaiju5xkaiju5x
    Posts: 2
    Hey inhope.

    Here's the secret:

    Unless you can relax to a level where you can feel almost every hair on your body...  its not gonna work.  You have to have 0 stress and you cant be thinking about "school, work, BS, etc"  

    Basically you have to reach a level of oversensitivity.

    Then focus ur energy and mind to feel every tingle.  When you start feeling every tingle inside your prostate, do not break concentration. keep searching for the tingle like you are trying to find your way out of a dark cave. 

    it'll work...

    put on some calm music.



    unfortunately, I wish it was like a insert and insta oragasm... but it's actually super time consuming and requires training and mediation.  Yeah the box doesnt tell you this.... but once u figure it out you might start enjoying it.


    Otherwise

    You can use my old way of doing things...  and Pump dildo in ass until you super O.  been there done that. u rub that prostate enough ull come for sure. 



  • PspotsquirterPspotsquirter
    Posts: 467
    @kaiju5x
    You are not a true fan of the show. Were you, you would know that @inhope has been at it over four years (to no avail). You would also realize any advice given is essentially useless (as you will see, if you stay tuned in and pay attention).

    The Aneros is an insert and instant orgasm, for me at least. I don't require special under drawers, scented candles, mood music, or ambient lighting. I insert one of my four Aneros, and I have my first Super O in 5 minutes or less. Achieving my results were not at all time consuming.

    That was a lovely episode you directed. But it was lacking the depth and compassion, I was looking for. I'm sure the next episode of The Asscapades will be much better! Maybe we should get Scorsese to write an episode, or maybe a full season.
  • kaiju5xkaiju5x
    Posts: 2

    @kaiju5x
    You are not a true fan of the show. Were you, you would know that @inhope has been at it over four years (to no avail). You would also realize any advice given is essentially useless (as you will see, if you stay tuned in and pay attention).
    The Aneros is an insert and instant orgasm, for me at least. I don't require special under drawers, scented candles, mood music, or ambient lighting. I insert one of my four Aneros, and I have my first Super O in 5 minutes or less. Achieving my results were not at all time consuming.
    That was a lovely episode you directed. But it was lacking the depth and compassion, I was looking for. I'm sure the next episode of The Asscapades will be much better! Maybe we should get Scorsese to write an episode, or maybe a full season.

    damn... 

    but wow 5 minutes or less? lucky you then 
  • didymusdidymus
    Posts: 101
    @canacan, That was an impressive and thoughtful piece of writing
  • BigGlansDCBigGlansDC
    Posts: 827

    @inhope
    No disrespect to you, but...THERE IS NOTHING WRONG ANY ANEROS DEVICE. NOR DOES THE SCIENCE OF ANEROS NEED TO BE MADE BETTER. ASK NOT WHAT YOUR ANEROS CAN DO FOR YOU! ASK WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR ANEROS!



    Hi @Pspotsquirter,

    The underlined words in your quotation above could be an allusion to JFK's Presidential Inaugural Address on January 20, 1961. I think JFK could have been a good candidate for the Aneros! :D :D

    There is a wonderful synergy found in the Aneros and its empowered user. ;)

    Thom./BigGlansDC
  • PspotsquirterPspotsquirter
    Posts: 467
    @BigGlansDC,
    You are correct young sir! The Aneros thing is a relationship. In many ways similar to one dealing, with one's signifigant other. The majority of people are not selfless enough in their relationships. What will I get out of the deal, if I do x and such? If I do l,m,n,o,p, what will signifigant other and/or Aneros do for me? Incorrect mindset!

    Perhaps one should ask oneself,"What could I do to make it better for signifigant other and/or Aneros?" Or maybe,"What could I do to help signifigant other and/or Aneros function at their highest potential?"
    Selflessness, and a service mentality. Correct mindset!




  • BigGlansDCBigGlansDC
    Posts: 827
    Hi @Pspotsquire,

    I am not all that young, young sir! ;) Washington, DC was hit by a snowstorm during the night before JFK's inauguration. Actually, that snowstorm was a Nor' Easter that blew up the Eastern seacoast to New England and beyond. So our public schools in Connecticut were closed that day. We all got to see the inauguration on TV and hear JFK's memorable words. I was 12 at the time.

    Now I am 65 and "retired." I am also a confirmed bachelor. The Aneros and I have a good relationship, a synergistic relationship which has produced good health and well-being in me.

    The Aneros promotes good prostate health. It also makes one a better lover. For all, whether attached or not attached, we can aim for the "highest potential" nonetheless.

    Thom./BigGlansDC