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I GIVE UP
  • ineverknewineverknew
    Posts: 869
    @domscraigslist, you can have sex with your girl and not ejaculate?  How do you pull that off? lol

    @Vanakin41, could be stress, work, and any number of things.  Or it could be something we dont understand.  Over the past few years I've had dry spells that lasted a few months and not really sure why, but when they were over things had changed for the better as far as my prostate pleaures.
  • @ineverknew
    it's not complicated I do a lot of edging and when we have sex she doesn't take to long to climax after two times I usually make myself cum but I don't have to. It's different with oral sex I usually can't last more than 20 minutes of that.

    @rumel
    You give the best advice I am about to read up on all my homework right now I will tell you how it goes!
  • This has been a roller coaster ride of a thread!  All the participants have made a real contribution to those who have not been successufl and, though I feel like a "lurker", having only seen this thread tonight, I just wanted to get my two cents in.  
    @Vanakin41 (and ineverknew):1.regarding the seated position, and for anyone concerned about losing their aneros into the toilet:  You can get an inflatable ring, like a small life preserver, that is used for people with hemorrhoids, and that allows you to sit in a chair with enough room below for the aneros to move freely. I, too, find that the quickest way to start up is in a semi-reclining chair with the "life preserver" underneath, or else, with my derrier just off the chair. Once I get to a plateau, I'll go to the reclining position (to save my back) and continue.
    2. As far as intercourse with the aneros in place:  I've had some very exciting sex with my Helix Syn in and my wife noticed the difference (but not the aneros). [I've posted about this elsewhere]
    All the best to all.
    3. Regarding nipple stimulation:  There's a point where nipple stimulation is so powerfully felt down there, that it's totally wild.  It took a while for that part of the re-wiring to take effect for me, but I heartily recommend it!
    All the best to all, especially domscraigslist.
  • Donchich
    Posts: 15
    AneRico.... Thanks for posting one of my threads. Although i am very new at this i really hope my comments can help others along as it has helped me.

    This another thread that updates where i currently am at.

    https://www.aneros.com/forum/discussion/15573/not-sure-where-to-go-from-here-need-some-expert-advise-please-#Item_2

    Happy anerosing guys....

  • Clenchy
    Posts: 100
    rumel said:

    I have a very different viewpoint on that concept. IMHO, it is our ego consciousness trying to control everything that gets in our way to the Super-O zone



    I've had good experiences trying to go to sleep with the aneros in. Of course I can never actually get to sleep because the stimulation is a little too distracting. But the act and mindset of getting into my usual sleeping position and telling myself it's sleepy time allows me to go into this whole other mode, than if I'm trying to have some kind of sexy aneros session. It's something I've been experimenting with lately and I think there's definitely something to it.
  • What's up guys I'm going to touch on all of your comments but first I would like to get your opinion on my current status. I got my girlfriend to agree to a little game. We were to watch a porn together and do everything they did no matter what. Now recently I've seen that a large amount of x rated features involve men get their ass holes eaten out. With the newfound pleasures I've been receiving from the aneros, (due almost completely from the suggestions of you all) I wanted to know what getting my ass eaten would feel like. My gf would normally never go for this but this she has always been fair and I knew if it was a game I could get it to happen. We went to a pornsite and chose a random movie (so she thought I had already made an account and set up several movies that had my desired outcome) and we agreed to do what ever we saw. About 20 minutes into the move the guy bends over and the girl goes to town. My gf is looking like what in the hell so I act like I don't want to do it which makes her want to do it more. We are both pretty competitive and she wanted to win. I guess my acting skills are pretty good because she bought it and really went to work on my ass hole. The woman on the movie called the guys but man pussy and he moaned, so we did the same thing. Now she didn't touch my prostate but I could feel it pulsate harder and harder with every lick she gave me. I was loosing my mind. We were not able to finish because she had a family emergency but it was great. I went home and put in my aneros but sort of fell asleep and didn't really feel much. I wanted to know if any of you guys have experienced rimming and does enhance or take away from sessions?
  • @Armon-neat
    You right this has been a hell of a ride, specifically for a guy who was about to throw it out and walk away. Now my sessions are getting better and better. I have been looking forward to a session on the toilet like the guys have suggested. Specifically since during my bm's I've been feeling tingles and humming. Nipple stimulation sounded interesting so a few nights ago I did and it def enhanced everything. If it's worked so great for you I will continue to explore nipple stimulation. Thank you for your input.

    @Donchich
    Hope you enjoy your journey. Don't do like I did and keep it to yourself continue to ask for help and things will continue to get better.

    @Clenchy
    I actually fell asleep with it last night. It did nothing for me other than quick burst of pleasure that dissipated as soon as they came. What do you think about or do prior to sleep that enhances these sessions for you?

  • isvara
    Posts: 589
    I have I think discovered a block. It is based on what @rumel is quoted as saying above. I have noticed that just as I begin to be aware of something new and nice beginning to happen it goes away. So I investigated this further. What I found was although I thought I remained relaxed and open in fact I noticed a subtle mental interference and a subtle muscular tightening up that stopped what was happening. It was certainly a mental control that took over. Now the really hard part is to see if I can stop, block, or undo that very subtle interference. It is a real pain and sneaks up so softly I don't realize it has happened until I become aware of the muscular tension. I don't know if I am on the right track with this but it seems to be my problem and may be with others too.
  • mdad
    Posts: 93
    Haha yeah, any time something new happens, I'm surprised and I stop it from happening again. Some of the sensations are not subtle, and they can be scary. Just the other day I had what felt like a surge of electricity hit my prostate; it was intense and it felt like it could have gone either way - crippling pain or immense pleasure, I wasn't sure. I had heard about such sensations before, so I didn't panic. But it hit so hard and fast that there was no way my brain wasn't going to have to do some processing and analyzation before moving forward. The next time it happens, I'm sure I'll be better prepared.
  • Clenchy
    Posts: 100

    @Clenchy
    I actually fell asleep with it last night. It did nothing for me other than quick burst of pleasure that dissipated as soon as they came. What do you think about or do prior to sleep that enhances these sessions for you?

    I don't think about (or do) anything, I act exactly as if I'm trying to go to sleep, right down to the position I usually go to sleep in. I'd say the mindset is - "Ok body, you can do what ever you want, but I'm going to sleep, see ya later." Invariably the sensations and twitches set in and I get sucked slowly away from this passive mindset to a more active one. (I still haven't decided if that's a good or bad thing)

    I think it might have something to do with how I'm wired now. I used to do the same thing a few years ago, but I'd be jolted back fully awake by a weird rising intensity that would instantly disappear. A few times I've tried falling into it, dipping deeper and trying to trust and embrace that sensation more.

    I've occasionally been able to come out of near-sleep with a warm and fuzzy feeling of snugness that I could ride along with the rest of the usual sensations. It felt like being hugged in a way.

    Anyway, like I said, it's just something I've been trying out, so I'm not sure what I can say about it beyond I find it interesting.
  • There are nights that I fall asleep with the Helix Syn in and, except for a few twinges of pleasantness, nothing much happens, but, as Clenchy notes, just the opposite can occur.  Take it as it comes is good advice.  @domscraigslist:  Very much admired your advice to the young man asking about "Am I 2 young"!
  • @isvara @mdad
    That is exactly what happens to me. When ever a new unknown feeling hits me to strong my body tenses and makes it go away. I to am working on righting this wrong. Hopefully soon I can make my mind realize that it's not pain I'm feeling just pleasure.

    @Clenchy
    Yes it may be the way you are wired as well as when I use mine I never intentionally go to sleep I just fall asleep while using it. I to get those jults you mention but they are quick and very far apart from each other.

    @Armon-neat
    Ok I see what you mean I will just keep doing it and I am sure eventually something will kick in. In response to the mentioned post I only did what I saw the rest of the men here do!
  • ineverknewineverknew
    Posts: 869
    @domscraigslist, it takes time and practice to realize your body is tensing up usually unknown to yourself but eventually you can learn to release that and just enjoy the pleasure as it comes.  Ive been at this for a few years and i still have a hard time completely relaxing.  At least you realize your doing it and can work on it, thats half the battle lol.
  • Every time I use it something different happens. Right now I'm using it and it's a brand new sensation. I feel a strong urge to push out almost like a bowel movement. I don't know if it's suppose to be like this or not. The feeling is good though.
  • Clenchy
    Posts: 100
    Yeah, a lot of people have talked about pushing out (rectal contraction I believe), and having this counteracted by an anal contraction that pulls in. I think I read someone saying their aneros actually flew out at one point. =))
  • @domscraigslist:  What you describe are what I first felt in terms of pleasure with the Helix Syn last December (4 or 5 months into my experience).  I just posted something on "Bunk"'s thread about techniques to achieve anal O with the Helix.
  • Theme_Gasm
    Posts: 315
    @domscraigslist - Regarding your rimming experience...my Aneros usage enhanced my experiences with rimming to where the last time I was rimmed I had an over-the-top traditional ejaculation orgasm because that part of me is so alive and sensitive to stimulation! Being rimmed has not hurt my Aneros experience at all! In fact the orgasms I had while being rimmed lasted much longer and felt deeper due to my Aneros practice!
  • @Clenchy
    Yeah I was really concerned that the contractions were going to cause me to go to the use the bathroom so I went to the toilet and that's were the magic happened. I got a brand new wave of tingles and luckily I never had to push out. Lol.

    @Armon-neat
    That post was extremely helpful. You could be right because the contractions and buzzes that I am getting are really spread throughout my butt hole. Not so much at my prostate.

    @Theme_Gasm
    That sounds wonderful. It's good to know that using my aneros will make rimming even better and possibly orgasmic. I will absolutely do it again.
  • Hey guys as things are slowly progressing well. I started experiencing shakes and involuntary movements in my sleep. Some have happened after using aneros others have happened without. Is this normal, does it mean anything in particular?
  • Theme_Gasm
    Posts: 315
    Yes, it means that you have a prostate that is responding and awakened to stimulation, and your body and mind are working together to accept and respond accordingly...IMHO!
  • @Theme_Gasm oh ok that sounds like I'm making good progress then. It's just odd my body is choosing when and how it wants to be stimulated and I'm not in control anymore. I sort of like to be in control at all times so this is uncharted territory for me.
  • Theme_Gasm
    Posts: 315
    Most men want/need to be in control, which is often the reason for little success for many! Letting go is going to help you be much more successful!

    TG
  • Giving up control is hard to do @Theme_Gasm Do you have any suggestions on relaxing and letting go?
  • Guys I need a little help. I keep falling asleep during my sessions. I always enjoy them but when I try to really relax I just drift away to sleep. How do I both relax and stay awake long enough to enjoy the pleasures I'm feeling?
  • Theme_Gasm
    Posts: 315

    Guys I need a little help. I keep falling asleep during my sessions. I always enjoy them but when I try to really relax I just drift away to sleep. How do I both relax and stay awake long enough to enjoy the pleasures I'm feeling?



    I'm betting you only have your sessions at night! Most of my best sessions are during the day, after I'm fully rested, and not after I've put in a full days work! However, I will ride at night to get some pleasure just before going to sleep, but then I'll remove my Aneros, so I actually get some sleep!

    TG
  • ineverknewineverknew
    Posts: 869
    Be more turned on.  If you had a naked woman in front of you begging to be touched, would you fall asleep?  I think not, so the goal is try to be more horny  ;)
  • mdad
    Posts: 93

    Guys I need a little help. I keep falling asleep during my sessions. I always enjoy them but when I try to really relax I just drift away to sleep. How do I both relax and stay awake long enough to enjoy the pleasures I'm feeling?



    This is a big problem for me. I mostly do my sessions at night, after I get in bed. Sometimes I can stay awake long enough to experience good things, but most times I fall asleep and wake up at 2AM with it in. I like to look at it as a better way to fall asleep than tossing and turning. :)  Private time during the day is not something I get very often! And if it is, I should probably be working. :)
  • isvara
    Posts: 589
    @domscraigslist, I am sure now that "not letting go" is my problem and possible the problem for those who seem stuck. That 'control' is so subtle that we are not even aware that it there. I have only just sensed it and it is just going to take time to get around it. E.g I start to get just a nice "tickle" when I feel the 'control' coming to 'help' but in fact it stops it by 'helping'.
  • Theme_Gasm
    Posts: 315
    isvara said:

    @domscraigslist, I am sure now that "not letting go" is my problem and possible the problem for those who seem stuck. That 'control' is so subtle that we are not even aware that it there. I have only just sensed it and it is just going to take time to get around it. E.g I start to get just a nice "tickle" when I feel the 'control' coming to 'help' but in fact it stops it by 'helping'.




    That's exactly been my interpretation as well!

    TG
  • @Theme_Gasm
    Yeah bruh all of my sessions are at night. I don't really have much time during the day and I have a pretty hectic work schedule. If having a day session is better I could go to sleep mad early and then be up for the morning two or three hours before work. Thank you for your observations.
  • @ineverknew
    The problem is if I watch porn I don't focus enough on the stuff going on or in me. My aneros sessions seem to be stronger if there is no distraction. Unfortunately during the less interesting sensations I just doze off. I will try some ways to keep myself sexually engaged throughout a session next time.
  • @mdad
    That is my problem exactly. I have awoken with it in me many times. I hope that maybe sleeping with it in me will help the rewiring process. I never do it purposely but it seems to happen more and more. Some times I just set my alarm after an hour or two into a session it goes off so that I can wake up and remove it.
  • @isvara
    You may have hit the nail on the head with that one. I have been trying to relinquish control to my body. It's not easy for me. Sexual I am extremely dominate, I enjoy taking charge. Learning to let go will be a process I am sure. Any suggestions on letting go guys?
  • mdad
    Posts: 93

    @mdad
    That is my problem exactly. I have awoken with it in me many times. I hope that maybe sleeping with it in me will help the rewiring process. I never do it purposely but it seems to happen more and more. Some times I just set my alarm after an hour or two into a session it goes off so that I can wake up and remove it.



    Occasionally, I'll be awoken by pleasurable sensations from it. So falling asleep with it in is not a huge deal, and is sometimes fun. But it does make it hard to have longer sessions when I start them at 11:00. At least it gives me something to concentrate on while going to sleep. I often times think too much about my work day, and this is a good distraction.
  • @mdad I never feel any pleasure when I fall asleep with it in. I just wake up feeling like I wasted time. I do enjoy the feeling before I doze off though.
  • Ok guys I'm sort of stuck. I really need a way to get over the hump. My sessions fizzle but never get to the next level. I know it has to do with my control issues any suggestions on how to let go of myself. Are there any guys out there like me who are extremely sexually aggressive in bed who have had success giving over control to the devise?
  • isvara
    Posts: 589
    Some where recently on the forum it was suggested that we need to feed back what we like by saying it aloud. My plan is to give enough continuos good feed back to the subconscious for it to alter it programming (control). So I started to do this e.g I like that tickle, I enjoy that pressure, I like that movement, as I responded to what I was experiencing. The subconscious work on averages, for our safety, so I am changing what I think about each session especially the null ones. On my first attempt at this I found that some of the nice sensations repeated which is unusual for me. Also yesterday my Ej was really powerful like it was when I was young. It took me by surprise. So I am reaffirming that I am enjoying the journey and smelling the flowers by the path. I have also found the good old SGX is helpful.
    I also think expectations make the subconscious feel edgy.
    (Writing this I think is going to be more helpful to me than it may be to you, as it is another message to my subconscious!)
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,257
    isvara said:

    Some where recently on the forum it was suggested that we need to feed back what we like by saying it aloud. My plan is to give enough continuos good feed back to the subconscious for it to alter it programming (control)

    Excellent idea to affirm your own positive qualities. I've long maintained that successful Aneros practice is more than 90% a mental exercise. Self affirmations DO work at reprogramming your body responses, it is mental training/conditioning which can only help your progress to better and quicker responsiveness.
    Every time you make a conscious mental note affirming or reaffirming even the slightest pleasurable sensation and then tell yourself consciously "...this is good ...this is something I want to repeat...I want more of this..." or similar statements you are bolstering the new neural programming already occurring in your brain ('rewiring').
    isvara said:

    I also think expectations make the subconscious feel edgy

    Yes, having expectations creates a double bind which may lead into cognitive dissonance. When expectations are unmet, frustration usually arises, this leads to stress and release of hormones which are counterproductive to relaxing and the generation of pleasure. Your body goes into conflict with itself. Consciously you're trying to generate pleasure but your body is releasing epinephrine, cortisol and other compounds in reaction to the stress and may be inhibiting the uptake/release of the pleasure hormone dopamine. The 'edginess' is the result of the epinephrine (adrenaline), a mild 'adrenaline rush' but counterproductive to dopamine satiation.
    If you let go of the expectations then the body can respond naturally and NOT in conflict with itself, the mind/body synergy in harmony.
    image Good Vibes to You ! image
  • I know this may sound nuts and I'll get a lot of criticism for it (and I'm not sure about this myself) but I think that as far as the aneros experience itself is concerned I found that approaching it from a non-sexual pleasure inducing and a narcissistic one at that, is better than Thinking of it as a proxy for sexual satisfaction. (What's this guy saying, is he crazy???). Hear me out. A number of compadres have written about dumping the porn and the tantric music or other suggestive stuff and I have been one of them. I think I made most of my progress towards being able to feel the depth of the early sensations with my device when I did that. Don't get me wrong, the sensations overlap and how and now my sessions can get me going sexually whether it culminates in lovemaking when I'm home or a dry T when I'm traveling. Maybe once your brain and prostate and perineum re-wire then maybe we can (borrowing from physics) get into the GUT zone ( as in the Grand Unified Theory of physics uniting relativity with quantum mechanics). Here I'm talking about a zone where all those pleasure producing stimuli interact and overlap and enhance one another. So, domscraiglist, and you've heard it before, just experience the sensations fully. Don't analyze them but make yourself aware of exactly what you feel and when and forget the distractions. Later, when you've learned the path, you probably can apply your re-wiring to other pleasure producing activities, though I'm kind of thinking that with the pleasure and bliss that comes with the full experience we may find that the quiet blissful pleasure is a better goal. (So maybe he's not so crazy, after all). Nah, he's crazy all right... 8-}
  • What up fellas,
    My bad for such a late response to your post. Family issues haven't allowed me to be as active in the forum or with my Aneros use as I would like to be. I have some free time now at work so I wanted to answer your previous proposals and fill you in on my progress.

    @isvara When I first read your suggestion I said to myself naw theres no way I'm doing that. After I put my ego to the side which is hard as hell for me I decided I could do it. I just had to act like I was having sex. You know when you tell your girl to do this or touch that. This was really effective. For a little bit it felt like the aneros was talking back, shit was wild! Terrific suggestion.
    @rumel Right this was a tremendous way to have an aneros experience. My biggest problem has been giving up my sexual aggression and becoming the taker and not the giver. This let me vocalize that aggression and be relaxed at the same time to receive pleasure. I'm one of them dudes that get off on talking dirty and freaky to a chick this method let me feel like I was still in charge.
    @Armon-neat Yo that's an interesting concept. It's almost hard to fully understand. I guess it's something like turning the action away from the sexual side and to self glorification. I kind of understand it but could you better explain this process. Read your post easily ten times, still think I'm missing something.

    Like I said earlier fellas I had a few personal issues going on lately. I didn't have the time or the desire to play around with the aneros for a while. What I did do was come up with ways to make my body more at ease with it in me. Since every time I used it I fell asleep I used that to my advantage. I started getting up a hour early every two or three days to put it in and sleep the last hour. Yo it really paid off. A week ago while sleeping with it I got a this strong need to piss. I woke up and right before I jumped up to release I got a strong dry O. If it had been any stronger it would have felt just like a normal nut! I had ten minutes before work so I couldn't get going like I had wanted. So that night I put it back in and had a superb experience. I haven't had The Super O yet though. What I am having is still pretty damn good though. The help I'm getting from you fellas has been invaluable.


  • Armon-neat
    Posts: 92
    @domscraigslist:  I wish I knew what I was talking about  8-}. Remember I prefaced it by saying it sounded "nuts". but in all seriousness (really?--yes, really), I think that separating the pleasuring that we get from prostate and anal stimulation with the Aneros device (and for those fortunate enough to have learned how to A-lessly do it) from our preconceived notions of sexual stimulation, removing the usual triggers, and just relaxing into the "zone" is a good thing.  And once that "re-wiring" has taken root (mixed metaphor--tsk, tsk), the spillover to sexual activity can be applied in conjugal, sexual activity that is mightily aided by those new found neural pathways.  We have been discussing how Aneros use has improved our sex lives in another thread started by AneRico. 
  • I suppose if I had worded my plea for help more like this man you guys would have been more helpful. Honestly there have times I too thought about just trashing the things (particularly when I threw out all other sex toys before moving in with my girlfriend) but instead I just ended up buying more models lol, searching for which one was right for me and would work the best. I too believe part of my difficulty is I like to feel in control so it's hard sometimes just giving in and not trying to control the movement of the massager too much. Looks like some great advice in this thread, I'll keep reading for the helpful advice I wasn't given, though it is nice having advices tailored to your specific issues and obstacles...
  • Theme_Gasm
    Posts: 315

    I suppose if I had worded my plea for help more like this man you guys would have been more helpful. Honestly there have times I too thought about just trashing the things (particularly when I threw out all other sex toys before moving in with my girlfriend) but instead I just ended up buying more models lol, searching for which one was right for me and would work the best. I too believe part of my difficulty is I like to feel in control so it's hard sometimes just giving in and not trying to control the movement of the massager too much. Looks like some great advice in this thread, I'll keep reading for the helpful advice I wasn't given, though it is nice having advices tailored to your specific issues and obstacles...





    You can see how the need to control is counter-productive to the Aneros experience. So don't beat yourself up over it, just accept that you may need time to learn a new way...a more relaxed way...a more trusting way to let your body, your prostate and your subconscious take you on a journey of self-awareness and exploration, the likes of which you have never experienced! Imagine...just with your mind, body and soul, you can experience minutes or even hours of pleasurable sensations that rival traditional orgasms, and which you are capable of having with patience and practice without anything more than just your own commitment to yourself to love and nurture your own soul! You deserve these experiences as much as anyone else...let it happen and be willing to let it take you wherever it may lead!

    TG
  • Waddup fellas. I want to fill y'all in on my process. The feelings inside my ass are progressing quickly and my prostate is certainly starting to wake up. The only problem I am dealing with now is I'm sort of stalled. No complaints it's still feeling good as hell. Not the super o yet though. How did you fellas get over that last little hump. I'm so close I can taste it!
  • PommiePommie
    Posts: 733
    @domscraigslist,
    Just keep going. It will happen when you least expect it.

    Trying to make it happen never works!