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THE F-SPOT
  • alvalv
    Posts: 179
    [quote=B Mayfield]
    p.s. They're actually selling this thing!
    Reminds me of the guy who made a million by selling a $5 guaranteed fly killer,


    two blocks of wood with instruction - put fly on red block and squash with blue block.
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    This was sent to me by a friend today. Good for grins.

    BF Mayfield

    Fleggaard Holding A/S through its subsidiaries, markets electronic appliances.
    The company specializes in selling televisions
    and radio sets. Fleggaard Holding is based in Krusaa , Denmark .

    The ad is real!

    Truly awesome.


    http://www.m2film.dk/fleggaard/trailer2.swf
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,265
    Brian,

    You've found another great one! Wagner's "Flight of the Valkyries" will forever be changed, replacing the attack scene from "Apocalypse Now" in my memory banks. Ladies take note : Always pull the right 'rip chord'.
  • [QUOTE=B Mayfield;84925]Need a handjob? Check this out. "What a sweet release"!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJf_H35iyK4



    BF Mayfield



    p.s. They're actually selling this thing!

    If no one has checked out the official site yet, Here is the new Valentine's Day commercial. It is fantastic!
  • Badger
    Posts: 656
    Re: Fleggaard Commercial

    ROFLUPOWUROFLUPOROFLUHS

    (Rolling On Floor, Laughing Until Passing Out, Waking Up, Rolling On Floor, Laughing Until Passing Out, Waking Up, Rolling On Floor, Laughing Until Having Stroke)

    Oh, man, that is funny!!
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    Nice Brian!!! I loved it! I love that the European countries seem to have much less issues with public nudity, whether on TV or live than the general USA population. A funny thing to note, is that the women sky divers did not actually sky dive. As according to the following picture link, what happens happens to women's breasts, and the human body in general while nude skydiving is much less attractive.

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/eliot/nude-skydiving-nsfw-26q

    Love_is
  • [QUOTE=Love_is;85644]Nice Brian!!! I loved it! I love that the European countries seem to have much less issues with public nudity, whether on TV or live than the general USA population. A funny thing to note, is that the women sky divers did not actually sky dive. As according to the following picture link, what happens happens to women's breasts, and the human body in general while nude skydiving is much less attractive.

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/eliot/nude-skydiving-nsfw-26q

    Love_is

    Yeah, figgures. Boobies don't look that appealing when concave. :D
    Bishop
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    Censorship has never been so funny.

    Dig it!


    Watch Diesel's SFW XXX Party Clip Video | Break.com


    BF Mayfield
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    Hilarious Mr. Mayfield!!! Thank you for sharing! :D
  • Sometimes, I think we might try a little bit to hard to reach our orgasmic goals. Maybe, simplicity can be our guide.

    image

    Then again...maybe not.
  • macjim
    Posts: 28
    Here's a funny French dancing penis condom cartoon ad that I found:
    http://attitude.adforum.com/top5/2010/01/27/aides-graffiti-tbwaparis/
  • VoyagerVoyager
    Posts: 200
    Thank you macjim.
    My brother sent me that cartoon last week but it would only play for the first 23 seconds.
    Your link played all the way.
    Very funny.
    Bonjour & merci.
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    Nice one macjim!!! Thank you for posting it! :)

    Love_is
  • macjim
    Posts: 28
    I'm glad you liked the penis cartoon.
    Does anyone like to see home remodeling disasters from do-it-yourselfers? I have a bunch of funny pics. I used to build houses years ago...Some of my friends and I almost did as bad a job as some of these pics. We all laugh at them because it kinda reminds us of our own experiences.
  • Just in case no one has seen it yet, this Old Spice commercial is just too much!

    Old Spice
  • ViggenViggen
    Posts: 20
    Here is a very funny video I found on youtube.

    YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.
  • VoyagerVoyager
    Posts: 200
    A little something that turned up in my mail.


    To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign
    Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

    In light of your failure in recent years to nominate any competent
    candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we
    hereby give notice of the revocation
    of your independence, effective immediately.

    Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties
    over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas , which
    she does not fancy).


    Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown (God help you), will appoint a
    Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress
    and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next
    year to determine whether any of you noticed.

    To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following
    rules are introduced with immediate effect:

    (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)


    1. Then look up aluminium, and check the pronunciation guide. You will
    be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.

    2. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour',
    'favour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut'
    with out skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be
    replaced by the suffix '-ise'. Generally, you will be expected to raise
    your vocabulary to acceptable levels.................(look up
    'vocabulary').

    3. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises
    such as 'like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of
    communication. There is no such thing as US English. We will let
    M*crosoft know on your behalf. The M*crosoft spell- checker will be
    adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the
    elimination of - ize.

    4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

    5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns,
    lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and
    therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns
    should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out
    without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not ready
    to shoot grouse.

    6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything
    more dangerous than a spoon. A permit will be required if you wish to
    carry a spoon in public.

    7. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will
    start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you
    will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of
    conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you
    understand the British sense of humour (with a 'u').


    8. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been
    calling gasoline)-roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

    9. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries
    are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips
    are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal
    fat, and dressed not with "catsup" but with malt vinegar.....though the
    "in" folk use onion vinegar (yum yum)

    10. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually
    beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to
    as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be
    referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable as in their
    mind (clearly not the reality) they are pound for pound the greatest
    sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are
    also part of The Great British Commonwealth - see what it did for them.
    American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that
    all can be sold without risk of further confusion. Please be warned,
    drinking proper beer will cause you to fall over and become completely
    incapable of coherent communication MUCH MUCH quicker than you currently
    experience (and that is fast already)

    11. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as
    good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to
    play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English
    dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to
    having one's ears removed with a blunt cheese grater.

    12. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of
    proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in
    time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American
    football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds
    or wearing full Kevlar body Armour like a bunch of nancies). With much
    practise, in time you may even beat the Italians (sorry Scottish Brits)


    13. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to
    host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played
    outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware that there is a
    world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn
    cricket, but wont be much cope at that for many years and may eventually
    draw against Scotland.



    14. You must tell us who killed JFK and Marilyn. It's been driving us
    mad.

    15. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's
    Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all
    monies due (backdated to 1776)..... we need funds currently to build
    more new roads, schools, hospitals...........oh yes, and Gordon Brown
    needs to get himself out of the thick/clingy smelly stuff, or he wont be
    re-elected (oops, I forgot he wasn't elected in the first place)

    16. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 pm with proper cups, with
    saucers (never mugs), with high quality biscuits (cookies will still be
    permitted) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in
    season..........white gloves when serving are strictly optional, as are
    cubed sugar lumps and little silver tongs


    God Save the Queen.
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    Fantastically funny post Voyager!!! LOL

    From an American's point of view, here's a few a things I noticed in no particular order...

    You for forgot to mention the proper English pronunciation for raspberry and basil.

    If you truly hate Microsoft, you spell their name as such: Micro$oft.

    Also, Mozilla will need to be notified to replace the English spell checker in Firefox to En-GB.

    I'd actually welcome $10 per gallon gaso... I mean petrol prices here in the USA. It would really get everyone quickly thinking of ways to eliminate our addiction to fossil fuels, and hopefully onto green renewable sources of energy.

    A permit will be required if you wish to carry a spoon in public.

    So much for eating soup in a restaurant... LOL

    All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left with immediate effect.

    Half of that is already being implemented in my part of the US. Round abouts seem to be all the rage these days.

    At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables.

    Now that's a double standard! You know darned well that Great Britain still uses non-metric measurements in addition to metric. Pint, stone, imperial gallons, etc., etc. LOL Besides, as I understand it, you folks haven't embraced the Euro yet. LOL To be honest though, I'd greatly appreciate moving to metric completely. Having a base ten measurement system is so much simpler in all manners. And NASA wouldn't have all those screw ups with sub-contractors not making the conversions from metric to whatever the hell we call our difficult to use and understand measurement system.

    The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually
    beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to
    as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be
    referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable as in their
    mind (clearly not the reality) they are pound for pound the greatest
    sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are
    also part of The Great British Commonwealth - see what it did for them.
    American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that
    all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

    I'm with you on this one!!! :D But might I suggest an alternate name for other varieties of mass produced corporate American beer... Watered Down Horse Piss. LOL Thankfully just about all of the local microbreweries in my area make fantastic brews that can honestly be called real beer.

    Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises
    such as 'like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of
    communication.

    Bless your heart! I can't stand that either! :D Although you've forgotten to add all the people that use profanity for the filler noise. Yuck! :P Profanity is meant to be used as an occasional exclamation, and a dirty way of describing something now and then. Not as filler noise every three words.

    July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

    I think the only reason people celebrate it these days is because they get the day off from work with free fireworks shows that simulates explosions and destruction. (Idiocracy anyone?). Take away the day off, and there won't be too much celebration. :D

    Love_is
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    I found this one today while doing some searching in youtube.com. It's titled Not In Your Butt. And the gal that presents it is a hoot to watch and listen to. A little bit of educational humor...

    YouTube - Not In Your Butt

    Enjoy! :D
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    WOWOUCH!!

    Don't try this at home guys. Talk about a ball buster!

    Maybe it's me but the Aneros seems far more user friendly.

    YouTube - Chinese traditional qi gong treatment for prostate problems


    BF Mayfield
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    YOUCH!!!!

    Thanks for the post Brian! LOL
    I'll stick with the Aneros for now thank you. :D

    Love_is
  • churney
    Posts: 42
    441 pounds hanging from WHERE.... might speed up restoration... but its not for me.. And Brian F M it's not just you.
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    440 lbs...that's nothing, did you see the guy pulling the van? How's that for a nutcracker?!!:D

    BF Mayfield
  • churney
    Posts: 42
    OMG How would you explain that injury to your ER Doc... :)
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,265
    It is sometimes strange and funny the things one thinks about during an Anerosession. In a recent session I wondered how many men in the Universe might be experiencing an orgasm at any particular moment. The following calculations are based on arbitrary assumptions, but it was fun to play with. [CENTER]There are between 10 sextillion and 1 septillion stars (100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000) in the Universe.If only One in a Million stars has a solar system (100,000,000,000,000,000); if only One in a Million solar systems has a planet capable of supporting life (100,000,000,000); if only One in a Million of those planets has intelligent life forms comparable to earth and it's population (100,000 x 3,300,000,000);if only One in a Million of those men is having an orgasm, then at any one time in the universe there are 330 million orgasms happening!
    That's a lot of orgasmic energy being generated in the Universe. I suspect those numbers are actually very low.
    [/CENTER]
  • VoyagerVoyager
    Posts: 200
    I went to the doctor's last week about some health issues.

    The nurse asked me what colour my stools were.

    I replied "Pine"

    She looked at me rather oddly.
  • artformartform
    Posts: 1,488
    Next time try "Butternut"
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    What will they think of next? I've heard of building a better mousetrap, but a Better Marriage BED?

    YouTube - Better Marriage Blanket
  • Badger
    Posts: 656
    I wonder if that's to go with the Fart-Right anal spreader, that was in a skit on Saturday Night Live a couple of years ago.
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,265
    Guys,

    If our Aneros massagers are "Tantric Training Wheels" and we become especially adept from usage, will we also become Tantric Guru's like this fellow!
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    Thank you for that video Rumel!!! :D :D :D
    Damn I haven't laughed quite that hard for some time now. Phew! :D

    I personally think the funniest part was the chalkboard writing:
    "My name is uauuaaaaanhhhhhhh uuuuuuuaaaaahhhh...

    LMAO!!!

    Love_is
  • Too funny, especially in light of the Super O experiences I've had lately! Having that last for a while is great, but all the time? Hilarious!
  • Badger
    Posts: 656
    I thought all of those old men at the poolside party were going to dive in to save her. Pulling her panties off instead of the rip cord. That's hilarious.
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,265
    Guys,

    I'm sure this classic scene from the movie "Road Trip" has been referenced in some other post on this Forum but I think it should also be referenced here. And for any of you who haven't seen this clip....well, enjoy your first "milking".
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    Some things for my 2011 Christmas list. My personal favorites are the Spike Lined Collar and the Spermatic Truss......WOWOUCH!!!!

    The 10 Worst Products For Men Ever Created | The Art of Manliness

    BF Mayfield
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    [ATTACH=CONFIG]235[/ATTACH]

    No, masturbation won't grow hair on your palms...but there may be other complications!


    BF Mayfield
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    The tough life of a massage therapist...

    See here



    BF Mayfield
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    Must be a real bitch to massage beautiful women all day! LOL

    Thanks for posting this Brian. :)

    Love_is
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    This video of the stand up comedian Paul Ash is amazingly funny and totally relevant to what we all talk about here in the forum. It starts out a bit slow, but stick with it because the jokes tie in with each other.

    YouTube - Paul Ash - Male G redux

    Love_is
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    [QUOTE=Love_is;95572]This video of the stand up comedian Paul Ash is amazingly funny and totally relevant to what we all talk about here in the forum. It starts out a bit slow, but stick with it because the jokes tie in with each other.

    YouTube - Paul Ash - Male G redux

    Love_is


    That's a hoot!


    BF Mayfield
  • artformartform
    Posts: 1,488
    Great fun in my neck of the woods!!! :D

    Thanks Love_is! This is something about why we raised more money than any other country for prostate health and prostate cancer research in Movember 2010! :D :D :D

    all stumping for prostate health and whole male ecstatic health all

    artform
  • VoyagerVoyager
    Posts: 200
    If you thought your private parts could only do a few things and you have the time watch this.


    http://n56.stagevu.com/v/4fd669a3ba0ff084df7be1bbfe65340a/112685.avi
  • Badger
    Posts: 656
    Hey, I get a 403 - Forbidden notice when I click on this link. What's wrong? There's no other explanation on the page.
  • rookrook
    Posts: 1,604
    [QUOTE=Badger;96724]Hey, I get a 403 - Forbidden notice when I click on this link. What's wrong? There's no other explanation on the page.

    Site is only for those pure of mind & spirit :-[ :O

    Possible malware situation: 403 indicates that the server requires a password or is looking for a 'familiar' ip address -- as in those who have a subscription. I did try to just go into 'stagevu and did a search for < 112695 >. Linux care up with a security warning so I gave up. Haven't backed up this computer in several days, got a full plate today and no time to play with something ugly.

    Voyager is covered with barnacles though and is tougher than me.
  • VoyagerVoyager
    Posts: 200
    I clcked on the link this morning and it started to download.

    Try going to 'stagevu' and type in 'Puppetry of the Penis' in the search box.
    You can either download it or watch it on line.
  • Love_isLove_is
    Posts: 1,672
    These guys are hilarious Voyager! LOL Thanks for posting this. I first heard about these folks many years ago through an HBO show. I think it was "Real Sex". And yes your work around does work. You can also get some shorter clips of what these two fellows do on their web site in the videos section.
    ~ PUPPETRY OF THE PENIS ~
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    [QUOTE=Love_is;96779]These guys are hilarious Voyager! LOL Thanks for posting this. I first heard about these folks many years ago through an HBO show. I think it was "Real Sex". And yes your work around does work. You can also get some shorter clips of what these two fellows do on their web site in the videos section.
    ~ PUPPETRY OF THE PENIS ~


    Love_is, Voyager,


    Brilliant! The F-spot would never be complete without a link to Puppetry of the Penis....nice!

    Thanks


    BF Mayfield
  • artformartform
    Posts: 1,488
    Indeed B!!! :D :D :D :D

    Thanks again Voyager for the link/work-around (Worked for me too!!), and Love_is for their website!!

    Having said many times (to her and here) to mrs. a that I am her most willing Finger Puppet of the Prostate, my fevered imagination has conjuring up scenes and shows for Aneros Ecstatic Male Chorus!! All of course fitted for these new Puppetry of the Prostate scenes with the Wireless Remote Control model VIce III models with vibes that can be varied like a Theramin, by whomever is given the wireless remote......!!!

    all the best inyouendoh! and good humour always all

    artform
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    [QUOTE=artform;96834]Indeed B!!! :D :D :D :D

    Thanks again Voyager for the link/work-around (Worked for me too!!), and Love_is for their website!!

    Having said many times (to her and here) to mrs. a that I am her most willing Finger Puppet of the Prostate, my fevered imagination has conjuring up scenes and shows for Aneros Ecstatic Male Chorus!! All of course fitted for these new Puppetry of the Prostate scenes with the Wireless Remote Control model VIce III models with vibes that can be varied like a Theramin, by whomever is given the wireless remote......!!!

    all the best inyouendoh! and good humour always all

    artform



    PUPPETRY OF THE PROSTATE....!!!! Whaahahahaaaaaaaaaa! BRILLIANT! My mind is running in all directions with this one. Artform, you've out done yourself!

    LMAO!


    B