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does aneros diminish desires for trad. sex?
  • Edit
    Posts: 0
    hi guys..married 30+ years here.....and beginning to see a dropoff in ability to orgasm with penile stimulation through vaginal intercourse with wife...i've also found the aneros to be very 'fitting' in our lovemaking situations the extent that im just about ready to 'hang up the jacket' on the coatrack, and begin to favor a mostly aneros based lovemaking session with my wife now......she is 'happy' with traditional intercourse, perhaps 4 times a year....her sex drive is now 'nil' and she's very happy just laying in bed and touching me....i too, have something going on with my body that is greatly diminishing my skin sensations, so vaginal sex, as well as masturbation to an extent is 'non producing'....i was wondering if other men here are finding that aneros 'sex' is more satisfying and less stressful for their wives/partners than traditional sex......your opinions on this, please......thanks...chuck
  • artformartform
    Posts: 1,488
    Hi chuckjo2000 and your wife!! :D :D

    Mrs. a (my wife – 40th anniversary this year) and I have found similar things, but mostly by adding new techniques. Because i have a medicine-induced partial case of Erectile Dysfunction, we have also been adding more of the Joyous Art of Soft Penis Sex as described in the six-part series in my blog:

    Sounds like you and mrs. cj might enjoy some of those options as well. After all, our seed planting days are behind us, focus moves to the next generation and life dynamics shift, not to mention the old bawds!

    In addition, you may find that you are energetically sensative (and give it time as it can be a will-o'-the-wisp very slight feeling at first) to these orgasmic/life-force/spiritual energies that we can exchange and be mutually energized by through either genital or non-genital touching too. There are posts about this earlier in my blog before the Joyous...!!! series.

    So for us, not lesser but more varied and different priorities (so, yes fewer trad. sessions but more in total!!!) assisted by aneros practice greatly. :D :D

    all the best exploration and enjoyment of ecstatic energetic love for ageless couples all

  • Edit
    Posts: 0
    Our desire for traditional intercourse has been replaced with joint orgasmic sessions lasting an hour or longer. Gee, which should I prefer? :wink: Our new found abilities (spurred by the aneros developments) couldn't have come at a better time in our lives after nearly 30 years of marriage. Due to menopause, vaginal dryness, etc. etc. the issues invovled with intercourse for my wife are not insurmountable but sometimes not worth "dealing with" when something SO much better exists. In our case regarding traditional sex, less is much, much more and we're loving every minute of it!
  • rookrook
    Posts: 1,833

    hi guys..married 30+ years here.....
    snip ....i was wondering if other men here are finding that aneros 'sex' is more satisfying and less stressful for their wives/partners than traditional sex......your opinions on this, please......thanks...chuck

    Hello Chuckjo

    Short answer. I don't see the Aneros as becoming a substitute for traditional sex. It just opens other paths of sensuality that sometimes augment our traditional behaviors and at other times become more preferable choices in our repertoire of foreplay actions and orgasmic triggers. Those may prove to be opportunities for mental and spiritual development that we didn't appreciate when our orgasmic opportunities were more limited. (When I was 60, I had no clue as to what my seniors were saying, "as we mature, our sensual experiences become more valuable." (I was assuming that they meant "more scarce." ...was I ever wrong -- we now spend more hours per week in love making than we did in any other decade of our lives.)

    We had proceeded slowly in exploiting these toys but the intersection of Breast Cancer therapy with our lives has motivated us to shift many of our sensual travels onto new avenues and highways to achieve orgasmic fulfillment. We now exploit previously unimagined positions, postures, points of contact and actions. Much of this would have been more difficult if I had not started using an Aneros tool during foreplay early this year. We had learned some of the basics before many of our foreplay options were suspended. (we expect to resume many of our older routines but without HRT support.)

    Welcome to the world of PDE5 inhibitors. I adopted that option in the 1990's and have never regretted it. As you have discovered, these meds allow you to continue many prior activities and allow you and your spouse to pace yourselves in a more relaxed manner. Using either a PDE5 inhibitor or a TriMix injection to ensure or extend erection removes the 'hurry' in getting the deed done before erectile maintenance becomes a 'chore.' That relief from anxiety, just by itself allows you share more creatively. Butt, you knew that already.

    Learn your dosing levels and I encourage you to use Levitra to enhance your NPT events as well as your Aneros sessions. I've been using a small Levitra dose about 5-6 hours before some of my journey sessions. It improved engorgement along my pelvic floor and makes for a nice warmth during my release into mini-O. There's more tendency to erect but I can usually avoid physical contact so I stay at the 'chubby' level.

    We haven't yet brought the Peridise into our lives. Last summer we had planned those as a holiday present now we're considering them it as post-radiation gift to ourselves.

    Slogan -- seal each caress and kiss with an SGX contraction !! :D
  • HelixerHelixer
    Posts: 566
    After the session tonight with my latest addition, Eupho, I was wondering something similar....I mean getting used to flacid penis, is that a good thing? Most ppl have already indicated that they Super O with a limp one.....May this weaken the staying power/that it remains erect with traditional sex.

    May this effect the natural balance of power?

    It used to be something a woman gave to a man, but what's the better?, so who get's fucked?....yeah we might be onto something here Chuckie
  • Excellent thread!

    Some of the younger folks won't understand but at 64 all of the above posts are helpful to me.

    I have ED also because of meds. Viagra works some but not for long at a time. Good for a 'quickie' but that's about it.

    The Mrs. has a serious vertigo problem. If she lays on her back during lovemaking she gets very dizzy very quickly.

    Our solution so far:

    Several Aneros models for me that give me great solo pleasure.

    A penis pump which gives me an erection that is rock hard. She sits on top so she doesn't get dizzy and that really makes her smile.

    Unfortunately, I have to use a tension band around the base of my penis which cuts off the blood circulation and a I lose lot of the feeling in my penis. The manufacturers recommend a 30 minute maximum for the tension band but that is long enough to make her very happy.

    While the sensitivity is not as good it is still a very enjoyable experience for me. Using the MMO techniques I can have several orgasms in each session and the movements I make while orgasming feel great for her.

    I use the Encore penis pump system and am very satisfied with it. I originally bought the manual model but have the combination battery powered/manual system on order from

    That pump is on sale for $135 with a $10 discount code shown on the linked page and free shipping on orders over $100. Many pumps are much more expensive so be careful if shopping.

    I have not tried to get it paid for my insurance but some insurances and Medicare will pay at least part of the cost if you have a doctors prescription.

    I originally found the pump and Aneros through posts to a forum devoted to those with prostate medical problems. which I recommend if you have serious prostate problems including cancer and prostate surgery.
  • BadgerBadger
    Posts: 777

    The Mrs. has a serious vertigo problem. If she lays on her back during lovemaking she gets very dizzy very quickly.


    I hope her vertigo problem doesn't involve vomitting; that would really put a damper on things. My dad had vertigo 20 years ago, and he would fall to his knees and it was all he could do to crawl to the toilet before heaving, and then laying down at the foot of the throne. It lasted about 3-5 years before it cleared up. His seemed to be a problem with the fluids in his inner ear getting plugged up; a very long regimen of antibiotics and antihistamines I believe did the trick.

    Good to hear that you are still able to keep the misses happy. When the wife's happy, your happy.
  • WoodsmanWoodsman
    Posts: 102
    Here’s something that might help your wife with her vertigo, if she doesn’t already know about it. It sounds like BPPV (benign paroxysmal positional vertigo). I know because I just had a powerful attack yesterday, I get one every couple of years, usually after I have been inverting my head for some reason. There is a simple set of positional moves you go through that is very effective, called the Epley Maneuver. It is said to stop the problem nearly 90% of the time. Wikipedia has an article on it, but there is more detailed information at this site:
    They sell a device called the DizzyFix, which guides you through the maneuver if you have trouble doing it. There is a link to a PDF of clinical study, which goes into great detail about the maneuver (p 384, table 2) I just printed it out yesterday and did it. Am feeling much better today.