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I think my mum found my aneros!
  • I think my mum found my aneros! I left it downstairs last night by mistake and when I went downstairs to go to work it was on the coffee table, My mum gets back from work in a few hours wtf should I tell her it is?

    This might sound like a joke but i'm really serious and have no idea what to tell her :oops:
  • NunyaGA
    Posts: 38
    i hope it was clean when you left it downstairs.

    if i were you, i wouldn't mention it, but if she asks just say it's something you picked up for grip strength or something.
  • lol, yes it was clean, thats why I took it down to clean it and i'm sure I left in the bathroom by mistake but cant remember but found it this morning on coffee table, I think I will keep quite coz there Is a chance I left it on the table but dont remember,

    thx for the advice
  • JIH
    Posts: 70
    If she asks, tell her you found it under the couch and ask her what it is. She may fear one of her man friends left it there and will not want to discuss it any further.
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,257
    reddevil1999,

    Obfuscation is probably not a good idea, I think it is erroneous to assume your mother wouldn’t be curious about the purpose for this strange piece of plastic she may have found.

    IF she doesn’t ask about it, then you have no need to volunteer an explanation, end of situation.

    However, if she does ask about it, you can tell her you are using this device for the benefits it provides for maintaining a healthy prostate and urinary tract flow. If she would like more information direct her to the High Island Health website - http://www.highislandhealth.com for more information she can read for herself, this gets you off the hook for a detailed explanation. This is a truthful statement without expanding upon the fact it is extremely pleasant as well.

    Regardless of the situation, mother’s (in general) are very tolerant of their sons’ behaviors and are very concerned about their well being, she is well aware you already masturbate, so don’t worry yourself into a frenzy trying to think up some phony excuses. She is not going to disown you over the existence of some little piece of plastic.
  • darwindarwin
    Posts: 1,196
    dodge dodge dodge.

    lie lie lie.

    no matter what don't tell her what it really is.

    but... guaranteed, she won't ask.

    darwin

    p.s., my mother once interrupted me when i was face down humping my bed. she kept asking me what was wrong, and i kept saying "nothing!" but, she just wouldn't leave my room, so, i yelled "I'm jerking off!"
  • Good subject....Long time lurker and first time poster. Even though I have nothing to be guilty of, this has crossed my mind too that a family member would find this by accident.

    The visual they would have would be priceless :lol:
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    Tell your Mum that it's a burnishing tool for making jewelry. Better yet, tell her it's a shiatsu massage tool for working on acupressure points (always best to incorporate some element of truth in there, lol)then turn her around and work out the knots in her upper back to prove it!

    BF Mayfield
  • Hi Reddevil1999

    I empathise with your situation as many of us here are actually using Aneros in similar circumstances; hiding it from our spouses or partners and would dread the thought of it being discovered. You are certainly not alone in keeping your Aneros use secret from those who you live with, irrelevant of your relationship to them.

    It would be extremely awkward to have to explain the existence and function of a prostate massager to a sexual partner who would almost view it as an adulterous exercise (I know my partner would).

    I agree with earlier posts though, say nothing unless asked. If pushed for an explanation show her the High Island Health website and tell her you're massaging your prostate for the benefit of your long term health.
  • TipherethTiphereth
    Posts: 146
    Shame on you Darwin !! Oh AND Mayfield !! . )

    Personaly I agree mostly with Rumel but only IF she asks because it IS your private busines.

    I cant see it being very healthy to lie about it if she wants an explanation...if you start tip toing around her now youll do it for the rest of your life: )
  • NunyaGA
    Posts: 38
    Tiphereth said:

    Shame on you Darwin !! Oh AND Mayfield !! . )

    Personaly I agree mostly with Rumel but only IF she asks because it IS your private busines.

    I cant see it being very healthy to lie about it if she wants an explanation...if you start tip toing around her now youll do it for the rest of your life: )



    isn't that what moms are for?
  • darwindarwin
    Posts: 1,196
    if you don't lie to your mother there is something wrong with you!

    the showing of the HIH site would be appropriate for your wife, not your mother.

    oh yeah, i forgot... my young teen daughter noticed my prostate cradle, and asked what it is.

    i mumbled something about "an exerciser" and shooed her out of the room.

    darwin
  • JIH
    Posts: 70
    Your mom may think you masturbate but I think moms probably generally don't like to think about it and my experience (watching other families) is that a mom may welcome a lie rather than have a family conversation with their son about such things. I can think of no better time for a "white lie". I like the burnishing tool idea. She may know it is not a burnishing tool but she may come away thinking you believe it is. Good call. (Unless she starts showing off your burnishing tool to others and telling them she is proud of you for knowing how to properly use it.) I make it a practice to never, never lie, but I would lie in this situation. For your mom's sake.

    Another thought, imagine the situation reversed. Do you think your mom would want to hold a family discussion about her dildo you found in the kitchen this morning? I kind of doubt it.

    When they start advertising Aneros prostate massagers on Saturday morning TV and people start dropping them in kids Halloween candy bags is when I'll say go ahead and hold a family meeting on the device and how much you enjoy it.
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,077
    JIH said:



    Another thought, imagine the situation reversed. Do you think your mom would want to hold a family discussion about her dildo you found in the kitchen this morning? I kind of doubt it.




    Okay, while my proposal of the burnishing tool was a little tongue in cheek I do side with JIH and others who have concluded that holding a detailed discussion on ones sexual proclivities with ones mother is likely a too information moment. As JIH has alluded, this isn't really so much about this being an "anal thing", as much as it is that a guy's relationship with his mother is sacrosanct. For instance, who among us would tell their Mom about their penchant for oral sex? In all seriousness, this is an area where most families allow some space for privacy.

    I could see myself discussing the HIH perspective (the health angle) of the Aneros with my mother. Outside of that, a harmless subterfuge would be my next choice (the "acupressure tool"). And I must add that don't see any shame in any of this. Granted, there are character moments in life that require that one tells the absolute unvarnished truth.....this is not one of them!

    Besides, if you did tell your mother the specifics.... can you just imagine the grief that she would give you for leaving something just laying around that had been up your butt! Messy, messy! LOL


    BF Mayfield
  • pnomanpnoman
    Posts: 145
    Tell her it's a new gardening tool used for planting seeds. Or a Japanese self-defense weapon used by ninjas!
  • I told my wife it was something my Doctor recommended for relief of kidney stones. That is not far off from the truth. I am pretty close now to actually sharing with her what it is and maybe buying a unisex model for her use. My wife knows I am not gay. (It would be devastating for her if I was.) We have been married 15 years, so she is pretty confident in me. I have had my Aneros for years and early on in our marriage I would never had considered telling her about it. She would have thought me a closet homosexual. Things have changed and my wife is less “hung up” then she use to be.

    Jefftech
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,257
    JeffTech,

    That’s a great idea to bring your wife into sharing the adventure of rewiring. There is the unisex Aneros model “Peridise”, see - http://www.aneros.com/detail.php?id=96 which you could buy for her to also learn about the added stimulation that anal play can bring forth.
  • TipherethTiphereth
    Posts: 146
    Nunya, what do you mean isnt that what moms are for?
    What exactly are you trying to "Point Out " by highlighting my text?
  • NunyaGA
    Posts: 38
    That moms are for tip-toeing around for your entire life.
  • Hi sorry it took so long for an update, anyways I got away with it coz she didnt ask so I never told, my mum isnt very observant at the best of times so probobably didnt even notice it on the table but dont matter coz it was never bought up and I actually forgot about it until I checked up on the forum again so If I forgot about it surely she did too?

    Thanks for your replies and for tryin to help 8)
  • Hi sorry it took so long for an update, anyways I got away with it coz she didnt ask so I never told, my mum isnt very observant at the best of times so probobably didnt even notice it on the table but dont matter coz it was never bought up and I actually forgot about it until I checked up on the forum again so If I forgot about it surely she did too?

    Thanks for your replies and for tryin to help 8)



    I think moms probably know more than they speak. I left a shirt that I had used for you know what in my room. I come to find later it is cleaned and hanging in my closet. There is no way she did not notice it was covered in you know what, and stuck to itself all over. I worried about it for a day or two, but never heard a word of it. What would be the point? She must know 99.99% of men do it. She could have asked me to be a little more "tidey" with things, but she probably knew that I knew that she found it, and that I had therefore learned through the painful anxiety that comes with such events that I perhaps should be a little tidier, if only so my mother doesn't happen upon soiled cloths again.
  • JayD
    Posts: 38
    Honestly, would she even know what an Aneros is by looking at it? I mean, it's not as obvious as a sex toy such as a dildo or something, it's just an oddly shaped piece of white plastic. If my girlfriend found my Aneros she would have no idea what it was unless she asked me. This what makes the Aneros so great, it's very discreet even when people are staring right at it.