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No erection...
  • Okay, so I can't seem to get hard with this thing in. I'm not new to anal, and don't ever really get hard while I have anything back there. It seems to me that being hard is necessary for the "sweet spot" to be stimulated, as the aneros doesn't hit it while I am not hard.
    Any help/ input would be appreciated.
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,140
    The following is a excerpt from my thread "In Search of the Sweet Spot" (found on page 2 at this time in the forum); The "Sweet Spot" is the neural plexus, an area of convergence of a series of collateralizing sensory nerves, nerves that serve the penis anus and prostate. I have described how the area may be most easily found, by finding the rounded ridge on the underside of your penis and following it down to your perineal area and then yielding pressure over the center of it (most easily done when you have at least a modest erection). Alternately you can start an inch from your anus and work your way up. Again it should be in the general perineal area, (if you're on your scrotum you've gone too far!) One should experience a tingling sensation that runs in the center of your penis down to your anus, and prostate somewhat simultaneously. "

    Let me re-phrase one part above about finding the "sweet spot" and having an erection; being hard is not a prerequisite for finding the spot, it just makes it a little easier. I would also say that in my case I do not normally have a full erection throughout an average session with the Aneros. I will notice a definite engorgement at the moments of the anal "involuntary contractions" and twitches and usually a pretty full erection at the onset and during the Super O itself, (as matter of fact the erection is one of the defining characteristics of the Super O for me.) Otherwise my penis is not particularly erect (although it's not flaccid either). With most people, upon insertion the Aneros should automatically position itself against your prostate in the proper position. The more variable component, by far, is the abutment tab and it's placement. My suggestion for you is to experiment further, find the correct placement of the tab for you (your "sweet spot") . If you can't you may need to modify the tab itself. Again see the full text of the thread above for more information on that. Also check out my thread on page 1 entitled "Keys to the Backdoor.....REVISITED". Go to end and check out my comments on 1/19/04 regarding ANEROS MODIFICATIONS. In thumbnail, I found a modification that worked very well for improving the abutment tab placement. Again, this modification worked FOR ME. Whether this modification would work for you or anyone else for that matter, depends on the location of your "spot". It is food for thought though.

    Most importantly, don't get discouraged, just keep experimenting, and keep yourself open to whatever comes your way.

    B Mayfield
  • That's just it, I get no erection even playing with myself with it in. While soft, I can't feel my sweet spot. I can find it easily when hard, but like I said, can't get hard with the aneros in. I have no trouble getting it up otherwise, so I'm stumped. I guess in all my anal play over the years, I've never really cared to get hard, I just enjoyed the feeling of penetration.
    Any suggestions? Viagra?
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,140
    What you're saying is that you lose your erection once there is any anal penetration. It almost sounds as if, somewhere along the line, perhaps without knowing it, you've trained your body for this response. Maybe your body is re-living it's own "sense-memory" of your first trip to the urologist! I'm not trying to be funny here, seriously, I am thoroughly convinced that most men's only experience with anal penetration is at the hands of a clinician who forever taints the notion of touching this area. It may be the kind of anal play that you've engaged in, in the past. It's hard to know for sure. I know for myself, that although I have always been able to get an erection with anal penetration and simultaneous penile masturbation, I wasn't able to become erect from anal stimulation alone. That came later. That was a learned/trained response for me. It was only after developing an "arousal regimen" if you will, that I was able to get some "automatic results" (some engorgement) from anal stimulation by itself. However, the truth is that it is never really anal stimulation by itself for me, because there is always some measure of mental focus, focused breathing, and the "knowledge of the pleasure that ultimately awaits" that gets me going.

    The fact of the matter is that an erection is not strictly necessary for having the "non-ejaculatory orgasm" (Super O) experience. Yes, it is helpful for finding your "sweet spot" but the "sweet spot" doesn't really become involved until later in the process anyway. You must first learn how to create the sensations that bring on the "involuntary" anal contractions. It is at that point that the "sweet spot" really comes in to play. So in a way it's more like the Super O creates the erection than the other way around. Initially, however, you must learn how to generate and magnify "pleasure waves" abdominally, rectally and anally. Check out my post IS ANEROS THE ONLY WAY TO FLY in the "Keys to the Backdoor Revisited" thread, where I give a description of some of the techniques that I use. Secondly, you may want to check out Jack Johnson's Athough I don't use his technique explicitly anymore, it gave me a great background in the power of breathing (valley breathing as he calls it). I strongly recommend it! Oddly enough, you may have an advantage over some who are learning this for the first time. If you've read through some of the postings you'll find many who get caught up in the traditional cycle of penile masturbation and ejaculation. There are even some who have almost spontaneously ejaculated from anal stimulation (the exact opposite of your difficulty). This traditional means of arousal is perhaps the single most obstacle that most Aneros newbies face, it's a very difficult thing to "unlearn", The good news for you is that you won't get hung up in this way. However, there is some learning that you must do as well. Get started with creating "pleasure waves" and forget about the erection as a part of your Aneros sessions for now. That will come later. Make a decision that you're going to try some different strategies and be open to them.

    B Mayfield

    P.S. Forget the Viagra!