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Questions from a Newbie
  • YoshikoYoshiko
    Posts: 2
    My boyfriend enjoys manual prostate massages during foreplay. As a gift, I just purchased an Aneros prostate massager so he can enjoy a prostate massage while we are having intercourse. I want him to have the most mind-blowing orgasm ever! However, I want to make sure that we can make love as we usually do even with the Aneros fully inserted so he can safely feel the benefits of the prostate massage.

    Any counsel would be appreciated!
  • newbie2009newbie2009
    Posts: 268
    Hi Yoshiko and welcome. You've done well with this choice.

    We started out just this way, using the Aneros during intercourse and we continue using it.

    Every guy is going to progress through various stages of experience and skill with this tool. I was a total Newbie at first and had no clue as to anal play. As I gained experience (much of it solo) I found out how to contract and move the head of the Aneros tool to "internal locations of interest."

    My initial 'skill building' took a lot of concentration that wasn't appropriate during intercourse as it divided my focus -- sort of akin to texting while making love. Perhaps your b/f is better at multi-tasking than I.

    You'll probably see moments where his gaze is unfocused as he attempts some tool maneuver that you can't see or feel. Be gentle and patient and tolerate the times when he has to go off solo and work to gain a skill or build muscle. That practice will pay off later on.

    However, once control and movement of the tool gets very automatic it fits nicely into any sexual setting with my wife. This guy will be able to seal a kiss along with a nudge of his prostate. A real big deal and I enjoy that hundreds of times in each hour I have with my wife ! My ultimate would be to experience a long a Super-O simultaneous with my wife's g-triggered O. Probably a long way off.
  • friday77friday77
    Posts: 25
    I've used my aneros while having intercourse with my wife. It's very intense. Fantastic!
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,140

    First, I have to take a moment to praise you for being such a sensitive and thoughtful lady that you would explore this for your boyfriend! The fact that he has the experience of your manual prostate massages will work greatly in his favor here as well. For one, he is clearly already accustomed to anal and prostate stimulation so there shouldn't be any kind of comfort factor to overcome. In terms of using the Aneros during traditional lovemaking generally it can be used right out of the box in this regard. There are no special considerations outside using some anal/prostate foreplay to get things warmed up and using the proper positions for intercourse with you. Again, you have the first part taken care of.

    With regard to positions for intercourse that favor the Aneros, they will be: missionary, side-lying and rear entry/ all-fours. Others positions are possible as well but they will likely require some preparation/accommodation to achieve. This is due to the handle portion of the Aneros which makes the female on top position difficult for instance, as it has him laying on his back (on the handle) constraining all movement of the device. Missionary position and rear entry/on all fours afford the most mobility of the Aneros and will generally produce a more vigorous prostate massage as they allow one to get into some heavy duty thrusting. The side-lying is more subtle, and provides a more controlled massage, but it comes with the added benefit of placing the tip of the Aneros nearer to the side of the prostate which many men seem to prefer. In addition to that it allows him to caress you, stimulate your clitoris with his hands and achieve an almost full body contact during intercourse.

    My suggestion would be to start with this, segue to one of the other positions for a time and then return to the side-lying position for the climax. Of course this is all to explore it on your own and see where it takes you.

    One other thing to be aware of, the more mobile positions (missionary and on all fours) can, in some circumstances, result in the Aneros being expelled. This isn't anything to be afraid of, but naturally you want to avoid it if possible. To do so, use enough lubricant to evenly coat the Aneros, but be careful not to overdo it. (Prelubricating the rectum, a procedure used in solo Aneros sessions should be avoided here). Most commonly the moment of orgasm can produce rectal contractions that will occasionally that will move the outward. This is particularly the case with the Progasm, so be aware of it. In all instances it's possible for you to lend a helping hand and do a reach around. This is done by placing your hand lightly on the base of the Aneros. That way it is there should it become dislodged. Again, this may not be necessary, so experiment and add to taste.

    If you have any more questions about this or other matters, feel free to post here or P.M. me or any of the other members that reply.

    Btw. which Aneros model did you buy?

    One thing I am curious about. I wonder if you would be willing to post on your experiences with giving manual prostate massages. This is a topic that is of tremendous interest to our members, and being that you have first hand experience, I'm sure there is much that we could learn.

    All the best,

    BF Mayfield
  • YoshikoYoshiko
    Posts: 2
    This is most helpful. It sounds like it will be safe and fun for my bf.

    In response to Mayfield, I purchased the standard MGX. I add on prostrate massage as part of foreplay in conjunction with oral and manual stimulation of the penis. I admit it took some coordination as each hand, my lips, mouth and tongue have separate and distinct tasks. I have small hands, so I can barely reach the prostate, which is why I thought the MGX might be a better tool for achieving the same or better goal. Anyway, he seems to enjoy it a lot, and has a hard time not ejaculating prior to intercourse. We sort of get him to a point of climax, and I back off, and get him back up until the intervals are too close together. It seems the same progression works with the Aneros.

    Again, thank you!
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,492
    (Note : Underlined Text is a Hyper-Link)
    Hi Yoshiko,

    I, too, would like to Welcome you to the Forum,

    As usual, you received some excellent advice from this Forum’s most respected and knowledgeable member, BF Mayfield. I concur with everything he said in that response. In addition to the general comments he made, I would like to point you to a couple of specific locations for further information. You may wish to read Women Too from the WIKI and the Sticky:A Wifes’s Perspective.

    I would add these suggestions in order to make the experience even more enjoyable for the two of you. After a suitable rectal flush and before inserting the Aneros and before the techniques mentioned by BF above, the two of you might enjoy a nice sensual shower together. While washing each other pay a little extra attention to cleaning, massaging and fondling his butt. This will not only be arousing to him but it will also increase blood circulation to the area, energizing all those nerves around his anus to wake up. Just before you jump in the shower together, put the Aneros and your lube in a bowl of hot water so they are nicely warmed up for the coming adventure.

    Just so you don’t feel left out of the Aneros learning experience may I also suggest you checkout the Peridise model for use by yourself alone or during concurrent play sessions with your S.O. This model was developed for both men and women’s enjoyment. In spite of its diminutive size this little jewel is quite a stimulator.
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,140

    The MGX is great choice for this application and with such a considerate lover as you are... there is no question that you guys are going to have a great time! Please make sure to follow up and tell us how things turn out! I should mention to you as well that I've received quite a bit of correspondence from users that have told me that the Aneros helped them with premature ejaculation issues. I know that it might seem counter-intuitive but there seems to be a equalizing effect for some guys when they use it during intercourse. Hopefully it will be the same for you. Rumel made some wonderful suggestions as well. I would definitely consider the Peridise for yourself, it too can be used to great effect during intercourse. The Peridise is minimally invasive, and yet provides some very powerful stimulation. Imagine that your partner is on top of you while you feel this gentle tickling sensation inside your anus.

    With respect to your manual prostate massages, I don't know what position that you've been using up to now, but if haven't tried already, have him on all fours with you behind him. This position will obviously limit you with respect to oral contact but it tends to orient the buttocks and prostate so that you can get maximum penetration with your fingers. In this position you will have better leverage as you will be pressing downward, which you'll find easier on your fingers. How many fingers do you use when you are doing this? I would suggest that you try two, this provides more stability and there's less tendency for your fingers to become fatigued. I might also suggest that try stimulation that is less penile centered and more focused on his anus, prostate and other parts of his body (caressing his buttocks, scrotum, and nipples with your fingers tip). Who knows, it possible that you might even produce a Super O or even a hands free orgasm (an ejaculation that occurs without direct penile contact).


    BF Mayfield