Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Sign In with Google

In this Discussion

So frustrated...
  • Have had a Helix now for about 3 years. Used it about once a month for a year and then about every 3 months after that. Tried again tonight and it was so frustrating because I'm clearly capable of having an orgasm but something just isn't working right. Tonight I inserted it, waited 10mins and then started the contractions. After a while my body shakes and the contractions sort of just happen naturally, it takes overs and for about 40 seconds I can feel this build up. Then it goes. I tried again and was able to repeat this twice and was convinced tonight was the night. Then none of the sensations came back. I tried for a hour but nothing. I tried taking it out, lubing up again and it helped but I never got back to where I was. I ended up wasting about 3 hours. 

    I can rarely feel the head of the aneros stimulate the prostate, I think that's the main problem here. I see videos and people suck it in and out by large distances but mine hardly moves. It's in there as far as it can go during normal use it doesn't seem to stimulate it. What actually does get me going is just concentrating on the subtle feelings from contracting and mainly the external bit pushing against me. Then when I do start going and the aneros takes over only THEN do I start feeling it touching my prostate which starts building up an orgasm.

    I've tried a progasm but that just doesn't fit me comfortably at all. The helix is a really tight snug fit but yeah I don't think it's hitting the right spot when I'm in control of the contractions. 

    Any of this sound familar? Any ideas what it could be?

    Thanks!
  • Wow!!!  I'd have to say you've described me to the "T"..  Your not alone.  I get to the point of a build up and it feels amazing, but it just dissipates without the crescendo.  I'm kinda glad I'm not the only one who feels the same way.  I just wish it would finally transition into the orgasm.  I know it will feel incredible.  I've thought about getting the Progasm Ice just from hearing about so many people having success with it.  I'll be watching this thread, hopefully we will get some advice.
  • I think maybe your trying too hard when you have sessions and maybe not enough sessions in general.  Once a month is not enough.   If you go into a session with the only goal of having an orgasm your probably going to be disappointed.  You need to just relax and enjoy ALL of the feelings and subtle movements.  Eventually with an open mind things will progress and happen.  I know that seems backwards since we all come here for the super O, but trust me, its just the best way things progress.
  • Kenman2625, you said "What actually does get me going is just concentrating on the subtle feelings from contracting and mainly the external bit pushing against me. Then when I do start going and the aneros takes over only THEN do I start feeling it touching my prostate which starts building up an orgasm." That happens to me, it takes a while of building arousal for my prostate to get sensitive and swell. For me, arousal means getting flushed with heat, butterflies and increased heartbeats. Then I can feel the device petting my prostate like a kitten. Then the pleasure waves really starts. It may or may not lead to dry orgasms from there. I agree with Ineverknew, have sessions more often, let your body be your guide.
  • What I think is that you're expecting too much, and trying too hard to get there. Just enjoy what happens, and let it happen naturally. Relaxing and really not expecting anything is the best way. Just enjoy every sensation, no matter how small. THAT is how you will progress.

    Also, you aren't using it often enough. It's like working out. If you exercise too much, you'll burn out, and if you don't exercise often enough you won't get any results.
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,253
    kenman2626,
    I think 'ineverknew', 'euphemistic' & 'Wandering_Smoke' are all correct in their comments. Dropping expectations and just practicing more often (when aroused) will probably improve your experiences.

    I can rarely feel the head of the aneros stimulate the prostate, I think that's the main problem here.

    This is pretty common, rather than feeling a distinct sense of touch/contact you are more likely going to feel a generalized sensation of slight pressure somewhere inside. As a result of this generalized sensation you may feel the development of pleasurable pulses originating from your pelvic area but they may also arise from other areas of your body, seemingly totally unrelated, such as your feet or hands, arms or chest, belly or neck. If you are expecting to feel a specific prostate sensation then you may be waiting forever and be frustrated all the while waiting for it. Instead, become aware of sensations occurring anywhere in the body and focus your attention on those generating pleasure.

    I see videos and people suck it in and out by large distances but mine hardly moves. It's in there as far as it can go during normal use it doesn't seem to stimulate it.

    First, it does not take much movement to generate pleasurable massage action. If you look at the user's poll Aneros Movement, How far does it move? you will see that nearly 75% of men report movements of less than 5/8"(16mm), that's pretty small. Second, I have long maintained that watching videos of men enduring vigorous spasmodic reactions during their orgasms may lead one to think that these are what one should expect to experience but that is simply NOT TRUE! 'BF Mayfield', our most respected and veteran teacher here said -
    "My opinion is that YOU WILL NEVER DISCOVER THE TECHNIQUES OF ACCESSING THE SUPER O FROM WATCHING A VIDEO. The reason, as I've described previously, is that there is a great deal that is going on internally that defies scrutiny. So while such videos may be titilating, they will have a difficult time being enlightening. (It's like someone giving you a video that shows an individual meditating and expecting you to learn how to meditate from it.) What I'm trying to express here is that even if one sees an individual who outwardly displays physical signs of this type orgasm (and remember that many don't), it does nothing to illuminate the path for getting there! Such videos may be interesting to watch, but they won't get you where you want to go."

    What actually does get me going is just concentrating on the subtle feelings from contracting and mainly the external bit pushing against me. Then when I do start going and the aneros takes over only THEN do I start feeling it touching my prostate which starts building up an orgasm.

    This is the path forward, acknowledging and nurturing those subtle feelings, not hammering them with strong contractions trying to make them build but soft, little helping nudges and mental 'intent' for them to grow.
    image Good Vibes to You ! image
  • Thanks for all the feedback, I'm keen to try again now because what I didn't really point out in my frustrated message was that the early moments where something was working was a really beautiful experience. I like the meditation aspect too, I just think of nothing for brief moments of time. During the few times that my body lost control I started visualizing sexy images to try and bring myself over the edge, perhaps a bad idea? Even though I was doing this I was still focusing my feelings within my anus and not the penis but even so is it a bad idea to start thinking about such images and instead 100% focus on within?

    I just wish somehow the aneros would tell you when your body has had enough instead of wasting another hour or so trying to recreate those good feelings:D. Perhaps I can get into the habit of just spending a hour getting to the good feelings and then after 10mins of nothing accept it and be thankful for the feelings?

    I'll try and keep at it, at least once a week. I'm curious, if you have these orgasms is it easier to get to them in the future? Do you get to a point where you're so in tune with your body that you can guarantee an orgasm every time?  

    As for the Progasm ice it looks similer to the old progasm's shape and I found that incredibly uncomfortable to insert all the way. My helix is tricky too but I can insert that every time. Tempted to try again now, thanks everyone.
  • many people use different methods to increase arousal during a session, picturing sexy images im sure is fine as is listening to relaxing music or such.  Though I would refrain from watching porn as that will probably be too distracting and is kinda a bad habit to get into.  I myself like to fantasize sexy scenarios or play them out in my head. 

    Some people can orgasm almost everytime they have a session though many like myself are not there yet and are beholden to what ever is thrown at us and left to just enjoy the session for what it was.

    The progasm ice is identical to the progasm classic, its just a smoother finish.  
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,253

    During the few times that my body lost control I started visualizing sexy images to try and bring myself over the edge, perhaps a bad idea?

    I think using fantasy and visualization to enhance your arousal is a very good idea for two reasons. 1.) It gets your subconscious involved and this is where your real arousal arises from. 2.) The visualizing/fantasy gets your ego consciousness out of its analytical/judgmental processing and concern with control/directing the action. However, holding on to the concept of there being an "...edge" is indicative of traditional thought processes about what constitutes orgasm. You may benefit from reading the What's an Orgasm? and my post regarding 'the EDGE'.

    I just wish somehow the aneros would tell you when your body has had enough instead of wasting another hour or so trying to recreate those good feelings:D.

    The Aneros is just an inanimate piece of plastic so it's not going to communicate anything. Listening to your body's language of subtle sensations will communicate everything you need to know, you just need to suspend your ego's need to control things to hear those sensations speak to you.

    Perhaps I can get into the habit of just spending a hour getting to the good feelings and then after 10mins of nothing accept it and be thankful for the feelings?

    That sounds like a good plan to me.

    I'm curious, if you have these orgasms is it easier to get to them in the future?

    As you become 'rewired' you establish new neural pathways in the brain, as these pathways become more used they are strengthened and to a certain extent, yes, it does become easier to reach those orgasmic states but all the other conditions for you reaching orgasm still have to be there.

    Do you get to a point where you're so in tune with your body that you can guarantee an orgasm every time?

    It hasn't happened for me after 6 1/2 years of practice but I can't speak for anyone else, I suspect you can NOT be guaranteed an orgasm every time.
    image Good Vibes to You ! image
  • Currently, given the progress I've made, I can lie down on my bed, and with some very subtle contractions, get some VERY serious P-waves flowing. This by itself is incredible because the waves will flow, and flow, and keep flowing for as long as I let it! Now, as great as my orgasms can be, when I have the time, I'm so very greatful for theses P-waves because they are amazing! These waves, originally started out as very brief tingles several months ago, but have grown considerably into amazing waves of pleasure that make me happy to be alive! I love my prostate!

    Updated: I forgot to mention...these waves are occurring now without the Aneros...which makes them that much more amazing. It's also evidence of how far you can progress once your prostate is awake!
  • Thanks again, especially Rumel for that link about the edge. Need to rewire my brain. 

    I thought I'd give it another go tonight. Spent 15mins easing into it, had a couple of nice moments and then it went. After 10mins I was able to accept and call it a night. Felt good about it. It wasn't as good as last night, last night I had physical shaking but that didn't happen tonight. I did feel my prostate being massaged though, I love it when something takes over and you can feel what I can best describe as a little tongue deep inside licking a G spot with a life of it's own. It's very subtle but if you concentrate it's amazing. Usually that lasts about 30 seconds. Not sure what that is.  

    So yeah I'm thinking having a session 2 nights in a row is not such a great idea. Think I'll leave it for 2-3 days.
  • That "tongue deep inside licking a G spot" is likely the Aneros doing its dance! I get similar sensations. That 30 seconds of sensations can and will likely grow as I described. Keep enjoying, and you'll likely be surprised at what comes to pass! Enjoy!
  • Had another session a few days ago, 1 hour and nothing happened. Tried again today which resulted in a 4 hour session  :-$ No orgasms but a LOT of involuntary contracting which felt really good which is why it lasted so long as I didn't want to stop. Got them in all sorts of positions but it worked particular well on all fours with my head down which I tried for the first time. Just a lot of waves, no really amazing feelings but enjoyable. I think it went well today because this is the first evening where I gave myself an evening off from personal work, was going to play games but this ended up being more enjoyable. 4 hours though, is that not so strange or is it unheard of? 
  • Oh, it's been heard of!
  • Four hours would be common for me if I didn't have a job or working on a PhD...it's quite amazing! I love my p-waves and prostate orgasms!
  • Had another session a few days ago, 1 hour and nothing happened. Tried again today which resulted in a 4 hour session  :-$ No orgasms but a LOT of involuntary contracting which felt really good which is why it lasted so long as I didn't want to stop. Got them in all sorts of positions but it worked particular well on all fours with my head down which I tried for the first time. Just a lot of waves, no really amazing feelings but enjoyable. I think it went well today because this is the first evening where I gave myself an evening off from personal work, was going to play games but this ended up being more enjoyable. 4 hours though, is that not so strange or is it unheard of? 




    just got my aneros...had some nice feelings but nothing like the vids I checked out...your posts give me hope...as well as all the other responders
  • just got my aneros...had some nice feelings but nothing like the vids I checked out...your posts give me hope...as well as all the other responders



    Keep in mind that the videos are only one example of how to experience Aneros, not everyone has that kind of reaction, but yet they do get amazing orgasms just the same! Enjoy what you do get!
  • Funny you should say that, the videos played a part in tonight's session.

    It sort of lasted 3 hours if you include sleeping :D The big thing about this session is that I was getting waves of pleasure within 10-15 minutes, I'm certainly getting in tune with how to contract, it's this VERY subtle almost internal squeeze I do where as before I would be doing these intense squeezes. It's like trying to suck up a tiny pea into your anus rather than trying to suck up a olive? :p I actually find myself doing it out of sessions, I can do the same squeeze and it's quite nice. Even at work :D Anyway, just little waves of pleasure and then I drifted off to sleep due to tiredness for about a hour. Then I woke up, was thinking of giving up my session but I tried again and almost instantly I was getting these really nice waves of pleasure for a while. Then I remembered a video from the video thread here. It's one where a guy lies on his front on top of a towel in his bed and does what seems to be voluntary thrusts but they eventually turn into non voluntary and it looks like he's having a full body orgasm? shouting into his pillow and everything. I didn't get there but I felt like I was experiencing some of what he was. For this method I was contracting really hard and thrusting it (no hands) into me which every now and again set me into these natural reactionary shakes. I felt something and could imagine having an orgasm from it but I think with this method it's less about an anal orgasm but rather anal pleasure and concentrating resulting in penis ejaculation from desire to cum? Where as before it was about concentrating on very subtle movements. I wonder if one is worth exploring more than the other? 

    Have a helix syn coming soon, looking forward to the extra comfort. I've heard it's much better for keeping in overnight? I like that idea, tried a few times with my standard helix and either I wake up in the middle of the night needing to take it out or it's painful to take out in the morning. 
  • That's great news...you're getting good responses and you seem to understand the subtleness of using gentle contractions and for letting the feelings come to you! However, if your hard contractions are involuntary, go with it...they will likely evolve over time. The pleasure waves you were having are likely your prostate reacting, and with practice those can turn in to waves of longer duration, more strength and intensity! Avoid hard contraction as your not trying to pound the feelings out of your prostate, you're working to coax and tease them out. Sleeping with the Helix Syn is very nice provided you lube sufficiently! Sounds like good things are coming your way buddy!
  • ReWireReWire
    Posts: 13
    I agree with the great wisdom from the above users. I did want to share something and I wonder if any of the users have found this also. When the feelings seem to stop for me shortly into a session, after the helix was removed, I found I had a small movement to pass. I was clear when I started the session. So, I think that a bowl in my situation definaly stops the whole session. Also, I would recommend if you are going to sleep with the unit in, remove the curly part of the unit and sand it down really smooth. Also, I have found that the unrefined Shea Butter is the way to go. It stays lubed all night and you will not have any pain pulling it out in the morning. You can find it some health and nutrition stores or online. Do not buy the Raw Shea Butter, it is very gritty. I tossed it.
  • inhope
    Posts: 285
    i am at this phase myself, just starting to feel something (after 4 years!!) i do however need to watch porn to get aroused enough for anything to happen.