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It's not about the size
  • I get a lot of questions from folks who seem to think that bigger is always better. That's not really true for any kind of of sex, but especially for prostate play. So here's a blog post I wrote on the topic. I'd love to hear what you think!



    One of the most frequent questions I hear about prostate play (once we get past the common concerns) is whether something as slim as a finger or the Aneros MGX
    is going to do anything. After all, we’re so used to thinking that
    bigger is better, so how can a slender toy or a finger be effective?

    First off, can we please set aside the whole “more is better”
    attitude? Each person has their own preferences for length and width,
    whether that’s for anal or vaginal play, and too big can be really
    uncomfortable. As the old joke goes, the difference between “ouch” and
    “yum” is about two inches. That’s especially true for anal play, since
    the rectum has a 90 degree bend about 6-8 inches in, and that doesn’t
    address the question of width at all. A lot of anal enthusiasts prefer
    width over length, but even so, there’s still a point at which wider
    becomes painful.

    Something that a lot of people don’t realize is that once your toy is
    wider than the prostate, going bigger doesn’t get you more prostate
    sensation. If you think about it, it makes sense. You can’t get more
    surface area contact with a toy that’s wider than the prostate and
    unlike the anus or the vagina, the prostate isn’t getting stretched any
    further. So while bigger toys can offer more anal or vaginal sensation,
    there’s a maximum size for prostate pleasure.

    Of course, that doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy the added anal
    stimulation. But anal pleasure and prostate pleasure are different. In
    fact, some of the men we surveyed for the book said that if they could
    get direct prostate massage without anal penetration they would, some
    said that they liked both together, and others reported that sometimes
    they wanted one, and sometimes they wanted the other. In fact, at least
    one guy said that he doesn’t really enjoy prostate sensations at all,
    but that he really likes anal play. All of that parallels what women say about the G-spot.

    And then there’s the fact that a smaller surface can actually offer
    more intense pleasures. Think about the difference between having
    someone rub your back with the point of their thumb versus their entire
    hand. The same force over a smaller surface area means more pressure.
    This is less of a factor for fingers since you can apply pressure with
    two or three fingers, but when we’re talking about a dildo or an Aneros toy, you can often get more pleasure from something slimmer. Sometimes, less is more.

    Besides, when it comes to anal play, it’s good to have more
    possibilities available to you. The anal and pelvic muscles can get
    tight, especially if you’ve been sitting in a chair or a car for hours,
    or if you’re feeling stressed. Even experienced anal players have days
    when their bodies don’t want large toys, just as we have days when we
    don’t feel all that hungry for dinner. If you get too attached to the
    ideas that bigger is always better or that you should be able to handle
    the same toy that you could handle last time, you’re a lot more likely
    to have an unpleasant time or even end up hurting yourself.

    So if you’re looking for a dildo or other toy
    for prostate fun, don’t get too worried about the size. You can have a
    mind-blowing time with something as slim as a finger. And that is a
    fantastic way to enjoy prostate fun.

  • legacelegace
    Posts: 129
    agreed, size is more of a visual/mental turn on. its also easier to focus when only a small surface area is being stimulated, difficult to focus on rectum, prostate, anal sensations all at once.
  • GilmanGilman
    Posts: 125
    It is amazing that I can enjoy my Peridise as much as my Helix. So it isn't just size.
  • isvaraisvara
    Posts: 1,036
    N.B, I am still in the process of awakening my prostate.
    Recently I found using the Progasm Ice made my prostate sit up and take notice! Shifting to the Progasm Jnr also maintain the response. Later the SGX also worked well.
    What I currently get is an intense tightening of the prostate (I think/hope). Very much like the feeling of a real tight erection inside. As yet only single random separated in-voluntaries usually when I move a bit.
    My point is the very large Ice made the P. respond. Currently I like the Progasm Jnr. But the choice is confusing.
  • braveneworldbraveneworld
    Posts: 1,101
    The bigger the device the less freely it moves.
    Progasm is wonderful most of the time, it gives you that full feeling and you feel every little muscle movement because you are stretched tight. Eupho is the smallest and moves faster and all over the place inside, its good too. I had my first Super O with it. I found the best was helix because it was somewhat in between small and big so was a happy medium. Now enter the Maximus, Max is in between helix and progasm and I have to say is just right (for me) not too big not too small. Max not only massages my prostate but all the walls of my anus too without stretching it. Lots of movement.
    Everyones different some guys are tight asses and others are slack asses. I am somewhere in between it would seem, at least with aneros use anyway =))

    So you see it is all about the size. But no aneros fits everyone best all the time.
    Some nights my prostate wants the helix others it wants the progasm but lately max keeps him happy.

    If I am not fully cleaned out sometimes instead of not riding at all I will use the helix instead of max or pro because helix is less likely to get jagged if you know what I mean.If I used eupho in this case it would push past the obstruction and cause problems.Helix will more likely push "it" back further.
    Size makes all the difference. After all there is only so much space in there!
  • I agree that size isn't crucial for orgasmic success: my toy collection includes Tempo, Maximus, Helix, Progasm.  So I have a wide range of sizes and I have experienced immense pleasure with all of them (well the Maximus was a recent success after considering it an utter disappointment for about 3 years).  Although I would say that I have a preference for the larger toys (Progasm is my favorite model).  For me the Progasm is what pushed me to a higher level of experience with prostate play.  Again, I have achieved high levels of pleasure with all of the models and often prefer one over the other on any given day.  But generally the Progasm is my go-to and the one I use for the longer sessions - I would probably be all over an even larger model if one were to be released :D
  • TinyPTinyP
    Posts: 1
    Size isn't crucial I agree, fantasy or mind setting is. I can orgasm by just fantasizing. I can have mini dry orgasms by just gently massaging my prostate with my thumb. The whole orgasm thing with all the joy that comes with it is a magic mysterical phenomenon. Bigger can be more fun though. I like the feeling beeing filled completely one day, but other days I love my Helix syn. So far I enjoy all the things that come with anal play. The only wish I have is reach the SO one day. I was told that it will hit me when I least expect it. We'll see what comes around.

    Love TinyP
  • braveneworldbraveneworld
    Posts: 1,101
    @AlllnTheMind what is the tempo like? Does it go back and forth with a thump?
  • @braveneworld My tempo experience goes as follows: less actual prostate stimulation and mostly anal stimulation.  A lot of the sensation for me derives from the ball close to the tail tickling my outer sphincter.  It produces a lot of sphincter contractions which come in rapid succession and after the session has warmed up and gets going I can get some nice prostate pleasure as well.  I find I get more prostate pleasure with the tempo when I am more aroused/full (few days+ of not ejaculating); contractions can get pretty strong.  I wouldn't say that it "goes back and forth with a thump"; it is stainless steel but it's still pretty small.

    Honestly I couldn't really appreciate it the first year or so after buying it and left it relatively untouched (got it when it first came out which was a few months after starting with Aneros).  But after practice with Aneros, sensitization, and toning/control of appropriate muscles, I learned to really appreciate it.  I still remember one of..if not my favorite sessions with it about a year and a half ago.  I came home after some very mild drinking and just felt like giving it a go, not expecting much at all except some pleasant relaxation.  Within 15 minutes the contractions were so strong and I had an amazing pleasure radiating from my prostate and through my body as my lower body twitched from pleasure...this lasted for nearly an hour.  I haven't quite had another session like that with the tempo although I have been using it much more lately and they have been very nice.  After nice sessions with it I have a pleasant afterglow and my ass feels like it got a nice workout.