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It just doesn't seem to work
  • hi everybody,

    I wouldn't say I'm completely disappointed by this tool - not at all. And I can still enjoy my sessions to some degree but over 1 3/4 years I didn't make much progress at all and this is what bothers me. I feel like my mind grows with every session and my mental state for having a session gets better and better but the results which my body returns still don't change at all.
    It's like I was a whale watcher getting up at 5AM every day and sailing out to the open sea with better and better equipment to see the swarm all the other whale watchers are so crazy about. And while I have learned that revving up my engine and going for the search on my own is the wrong may it still won't show up even though I'm just sitting there observing the sea.
    Yesterday's session was a very good example. I put in my aneros nogasm and managed to get turned on like hell which is always difficult for me. So I already had this very pleasant pressure around my prostate right from the start which seemed very promising. At some point I'll lie on my back (I've tried all sorts positions but this is the only one I can get some results from), concentrate on deeply breathing into my belly and just waiting for sth to happen. Eventually I'll stimulate my nips at some point but other than that I don't do anything else.
    Usually the well known involuntaries kick in pretty quickly but I don't find them pleasureable at all. I'm not even sure if these are the involuntaries you guys all talk about. It's rather like a tremble in my legs and lower body, not pleasureable at all, maybe even distracting sometimes.
    Neverthelesee I can still experience those tiny peaks of pleasure during the first 30-40 minutes of my session like a fish that's hopping out of the water but those tiny waves will always stay on a very low level and at some point in time my arousal will subside and that's where I usually end my session.

    I know what you have taught to everybody:

    1) No expectations - Well, I don't think I can really expect anything after hardly getting any results for 1 3/4 years. Of course everybody using the aneros at least expects sth because otherwise the person wouldn't use it but I feel like I'm far away from expecting the notorious super-O or even a dry-O. The only thing I'm looking for is some sort of progress which lets me know that I'm on the right track. That's not much at all.

    2) Don't force anything to happen - That seems to be the only form of progress I've made. In the beginning of my journey, the do-nothing technique wouldn't do anything for me and although I've tried it over and over again, I'd only get some results with appling some sort of contractions. Nowadays I can get to the same level with the do-nothing technique and I kinda feels like it's the better way to go but everything still feels like an engine on standby.

    3) Other things like deep breathing, being aroused, only having session when having the need to and the like - I've surely violated these things more than once in my journey but even if I adhere all the golden aneros mantras and feel like I've created the best possible rallying ground for a session I still won't be rewarded with any results.

    So what it is that hinders my progress?
  • twlltintwlltin
    Posts: 571
    Tricks you haven't mentioned:

    * Sleeping with it in.
    * Trying some relaxation agent (eg. alcohol, herbal sleep aids, etc.).
    * Distraction or affirmation.
  • [QUOTE=twlltin;101357]* Sleeping with it in.

    In the beginning I've sometimes done this with my helix but it didn't do anything. I might try this once more. Do you also sleep with the progasm in? I can remember some thread here where one guy mentioned he wouldn't do this with the progasm but I can't remember his reasons.

    [QUOTE=twlltin;101357]* Trying some relaxation agent (eg. alcohol, herbal sleep aids, etc.).

    IIRC alcohol was always considered pretty bad because it numbs arousal or feelings in general and I'm actually pretty hesitant to using drugs for this to work.

    [QUOTE=twlltin;101357]* Distraction or affirmation.

    I've tried listening to binaural beats and sometimes my mind wanders by itself or I might fall into a short nap but other than that distracting myself seems to be pretty hard. However if I do manage to distract myself it's always a safe sign that my arousal or session is over.

    And I'm not sure what exactly you mean by affirmation
  • twlltintwlltin
    Posts: 571
    Alcohol is OK if you don't drink more than a single bottle before a session. It'll relax the muscles a little, but not dull things.

    Affirmation: When you do get a pleasurable sensation, focus on it lightly and say to yourself mentally, "I liked that. That was really good." or something to that effect. You could also try a positive mantra, eg. "Relax. I'm ready for it. This is going to be great." Rewiring is mainly a mental process. You need to encourage yourself to notice the pleasurable things in a session.

    You know how there are some foods that people say are an acquired taste? How when you first tried it you might have thought it disgusting? Then over time you get to like it? I suspect the same sort of thing happens with the rewiring.
  • [QUOTE=twlltin;101360]Affirmation: When you do get a pleasurable sensation, focus on it lightly and say to yourself mentally, "I liked that. That was really good." or something to that effect. You could also try a positive mantra, eg. "Relax. I'm ready for it. This is going to be great." Rewiring is mainly a mental process. You need to encourage yourself to notice the pleasurable things in a session.

    yeah, that's what I'm trying to do during most of my session because I've gotten the best results with this method. And I really enjoy the feelings or this entire phase in general but it hardly ever gets me beyond a very basic level of pleasure which is a bit frustrating afterwards.
  • twlltintwlltin
    Posts: 571
    OK. Can you describe where you are getting the pleasurable feelings?

    I also get involuntary twitching in leg muscles, abdomen, arms/hands and in the facial muscles. These aren't pleasurable in themselves (except perhaps in triggering a slight afterglow of their own) but if I can ignore them mentally, and maybe quieten them slightly, they're usually the signs that something better is coming my way.

    You say you have a helix and a progasm. Do you have any other models?
  • I usually only get them in the leg muscles and abdomen and I usually try to "outrelax" them as well but I don't really mind them that much tbh.

    And yeah, I only have these two models. I'm sure I'll upgrade my inventory at some point but haven't planned anything for the near future.
  • Hello, grayfox.

    Sounds like you've reached one of those plateaus guys find themselves stuck on. (BTW, your "nogasm" quip was very funny.)

    The trembles, muscle spasms and the like indicate you have good prostate contact. The fact that you do not get involuntary contractions of the anal sphincter muscles, the PC muscles or the rectal muscles points to a common problem: inadequate relaxation. I know, you think you're relaxed and sometimes even nod off during a session. Nonetheless, if you were really relaxed, the involuntary contractions would kick in. You're not, and they don't.

    I wish I knew how to consciously relax those muscles. The Aneros Wiki has links to several systematic relaxation methods. I've used both and think they helped me get over the relaxation hurdle (Of course, I can't prove that.). Perhaps following a relaxation plan will help you, too.

    Best wishes for more progress,

    Dave
  • [QUOTE=ten_s_nut;101364]The fact that you do not get involuntary contractions of the anal sphincter muscles, the PC muscles or the rectal muscles points to a common problem: inadequate relaxation. I know, you think you're relaxed and sometimes even nod off during a session. Nonetheless, if you were really relaxed, the involuntary contractions would kick in. You're not, and they don't.

    Well, I think sometimes they do but it's mostly just one single bump which is very pleasurable though. The real problem is that I can't get them rolling but I agree that from the symptoms it clearly looks like I'm not relaxed.
    I considered relaxing those muscles as leaving them as loose as possible as if I was dead. But sometimes when the heavier tremble kicks in I find myself contracting a little bit so I'll end up in this feeback look where I'll check all the time if I am contracting by myself and if I am, I'll try to consciously release it. All relaxation methods I've read about kind of follow the same pattern but I'll definitely have a look at the wiki sections you mentioned.
  • jocco
    Posts: 90
    grayfox,

    Can you contract your prostate voluntarily? If so, contract it about 25% and hold it for as long as you can. For me, it starts a quiver which feels great, and the urge is to clamp down and fully contract the muscle. Don't. Keep it down at 25%- 50%, and the quiver will turn into a bouncy series of involuntaries. The trick is to breathe through them and don't voluntarily contract past 25%- 50%. When you can do this as second nature, shut your mind off and focus on the pleasure of the sensations in your pelvic region. I like to visualize my prostate and my MGX pushing up against it.

    I also have yet to have a super o, but have hands free wet orgasms, with or without my MGX.
  • airbagairbag
    Posts: 116
    I guess I'm pretty strange then. I'm not relaxed, in fact I'm very neurotic, stressed and prone to depression. But I do get at least mini-O's anyway, quite regularly. I got them on my first session. It's more like Aneros makes me relax. I don't want to take drugs.

    I used to like jocco's method. Start with 15 minutes of relaxation, then a good number of contractions for warmup and to get aroused. Then I would hold light contractions. This works okay, especially with the default position on my side. But I don't get much pleasure that way, and it's quite unreliable. When you hold light contraction, you're already expecting something.

    Last time I tried something different. I'm going to do this today and on sunday.
    On my back, with legs spread and high on bed/chair/whatever. I do quite light contractions at fairly slow speed. It's a bit like a swing, the rhytm is more important. If I do it too strong, no pleasure. If I do it too fast, no pleasure either. So I do one contraction, hold for short time (1 second ?) and that's pleasant. Then I do another one as soon as I start longing for one. I just focus on having not very strong but regular pleasure. No increase in tempo, ever. No increase in strength for a loong time, until I feel slightly stronger contraction would be more pleasant. I don't lead, I make some suggestions to my body. As I play with my prostate, its expectations slowly increase. Then I follow.

    Then I start moaning, gasping etc. I can only use Aneros freely when my family is out for a long time, measured in hours at least. I get more pleasure if I can moan, even scream.

    Some time later, my prostate gets very sensitive. Stronger contractions feel good, I feel something strange, slick, as if knobs on Aneros are sliding over it. I get a distinct feel of getting over a threshold, again, again and again. I don't try to orgasm, because whatever I feel is very pleasant. Orgasm just hits me once in a while. I suspect I have a long way to go, still, but these orgasms feel better than those on my side. It's like a higher time investment, but bigger payoff.

    Tip:
    Somehow I seem to get more pleasure when I'm not physically comfortable. If my position requires me to keep some muscles slightly tense, support part of my weight etc. It's a bit similar to how moving aneros with PC muscles feels good, but massaging the same spot by holding aneros in hand is almost nothing.