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Didn't know who else to ask...
  • I know this question may not be directly related to the Aneros, but I am an Aneros user and don't really know who else I might ask about this, and I see people of all ages on here...

    I am in my mid 50's and have been married and monogamous for 35 years. We have a very active sex life, generally daily or every other day. Like most men, when I was young it was an effort not to orgasm quickly when having sex. Nowdays, things just take longer and it seems I have to work at it a bit harder to reach orgasm.

    Is this a by-product of natural aging? Do you guys that are my age (and older) experience this as well? Any comments?
  • thhnthhn
    Posts: 426
    Newbie: I am right there with you on that...I am in my mid 50's as well but I see the delayed orgasm as a plus. I have learned to appreciate the journey regardless if it ends in an orgasm or not. I find myself telling my wife to slow down...where's the fire?
    One of my favorite things is for my wife to masterbate me, but I'll be damned if I can cum that way. wasn't always the case
  • I'm 68 and have very delayed orgasm and sometimes do not cum during sex (great anyway). I think most men' s prostrate enlarge somewhat as they age. Look at the anatomy of where semen is generated and the path it has to travel and it may give you more understanding.

  • Am in the same boat... 52, suffering from delayed ejaculation/anorgasmia for over a year. Visited about it with my endocrinologist, internal medicine physician and urologist, but they all gave me the same 'deer in the headlights' look and had no solution to offer. The urologist commented that other men complain about the opposite problem, for which there are several options to try.:(

    My wife has more of a problem with it than I. Personally, I enjoy the expanded sex part without the enjoyment-ending squirt, but she wonders if there is something wrong with her that I can't orgasm/ejaculate. And, of course, there are those times when she wishes I'd finish so that she can go to sleep! :oops: But, we're learning to work through it and have discovered some positions have a better success rate than others.

  • Mine hasn't reached that point. I always have orgasms, but sometimes wish it would be a bit sooner. I think some of it is having sex as often as I do...
  • I am a little younger than you (mid 40's) but I do sometimes have the same "takes a long time to orgasm" issue. I notice this is particularly true on the second session of a two-a-day sex-athon or if I try to use the morning wood and I have a full bladder. Both times it seems the sensation in the head of my penis is somewhat dull compared to when I haven't had sex in a couple days. I've actually started taking a little Cialis to experiment with this second-time numbness tendency, so that I my wife can enjoy the ride longer. In the past, when I tried this, sometimes I'd go limp. Not with Cialis! The pill is not called the weekender for nothing. I can get 3-4 great sessions of intercourse in a Friday-Saturday. It helps go for a long time (an hour of pumping)and stay hard and even though the sensation is not intense enough to cum from vaginal intercourse, it's still fun. When my wife is satisfied with the ride, I'll pull out and finish off by hand, which she enjoys because she likes to watch. I can use a tighter grip on my penis with my hand than the vagina can offer and it's this additional friction that ups the sensation to where I can cum. The added benefit to this approach is that on two-a-dayers, the second orgasm is more intense than the first when it does eventual arrive. I squirt less on the second time, of course, but the orgasm seems to feel hotter (if that makes sense) and last longer.
  • slimjmslimjm
    Posts: 577
    Early 50's here and, likewise, orgasm on a "sooner than usual" interval from the previous time is slower and harder to reach with less ejaculate produced. My wife doesn't care because for years she's preferred me not ejaculating inside her, so I give her all she wants and finish off by hand with which I can almost always produce adequate stimulation to orgasm. And like most I guess, that second orgasm early on after a previous one, though less intense, seems to last longer and feel hotter, perhaps the reverse of what you'd expect with producing less cum. I think it's the semen volume and pressure buildup (and consequently squirting power) on the first orgasm following a long interval from the previous one that we sense internally as intensity.
  • gm501gm501
    Posts: 87
    [quote=Newbie-Wan Kenobi]...
    Is this a by-product of natural aging? Do you guys that are my age (and older) experience this as well? Any comments?
    54 here. Yes, as you get older it takes longer to ejaculate. Very normal. BTW, consider yourself fortunate that you have sex so often. I have to beg for twice a week!
  • zanebluezaneblue
    Posts: 224
    My diet might help this.

    Not for younger men concerned with premature ejaculation, however! :lol:
  • My diet might help this.

    What diet is this and where might I find it?
  • zanebluezaneblue
    Posts: 224
    I've posted it on this website a couple times, might pop up if you do a search on fish oil. I also wrote a book called The Orgasmic Diet that has all the details, if you want a more in-depth explanation. The book is for women, because of the premature ejaculation problem in young men, but it works the same on both sexes. Just don't take the extra iron I recommend in the book, and use the Aneros instead of the Gyneflex.
  • fun4twofun4two
    Posts: 14
    Im total opposite So this is what I get to look foward to when I get 50 is to take longer to cum...Sweet Im 37 and I can come in 5 min sometimes sooner I think I just have to much feeling in my penis....Any ideas on how to take a while before I do I cant get 50 yrs old right

    Thanks guys
  • Fun...have you tried edging? It's a form of masturbation where the goal is to extend the time of your sexual pleasure. Rather than making quick orgasm and ejaculation the goal of masturbation (something a lot of guys learn in youth because of lack of privacy or fear of being caught) your goal is to extend the time it takes you to cum. Using this technique, you can go for 30, 45-minutes even an hour or more. But, it does take practice and some discipline.

    It can be practiced as a couple activity but it's kind of difficult to start out that way. Much easier if you learn on your own then bring what you've learned into foreplay and lovemaking with the wife. If you're not familiar with the technique, let me know and I'll post what's worked for me.
  • Hi All

    It ain't always just age, either. I'm 57 and on medications for blood pressure, cholesterol, and clinical depression (long story.) TWO of those medications have "sexual side-effects." Like most males, I thought that meant erectile dysfunction (can't get it UP.) In my case, it means can't get it OFF (a a miserable condition called anorgasmia; dysorgasmia is another one in which orgasm and ejaculation are "attenuated;" kind of muffled, dull, low ejaculatory volume and intensity.) Of COURSE I got stuck with the no-come one. I have pumped my wife in every position we are still able to get into, and finally wound up faking it just to get it over with. It's FUN, no doubt about that, but you get worked up right to the penultimate "point of no return," and THAT's where you get stuck; right at that place where one more stroke would push you over the edge. Like permanant edging. Again, FUN, but eventually you want, need, CRAVE release... and there ain't none to be had. Not by any means. I have masturbated to my hottest fantasies, watched some of the most intense porn I've ever seen (Bend Over Boyfriend, and others) and just had to quit when I developed a blister and some of the wierdest penile swellings I've ever seen!!) Add into this the usual mix of BPH, up several times in the night to pee (also unsatisfying; volume of pee all out of proportion to perceived urgency) and occasional prostate cramping (I guess...) following a stubborn bowel movement, and you've got one unhappy camper. Doctors... beyond assuring me that there's no problems with my prostate (low PSA, no lumps, etc) and the bland statement that this is all typical for men "of my age range," they're pretty much useless. They want to dive right into diagnostic procedures, start talking about "procedures" which sound both undignified and frightening, given some of the potential side effects. " You can either wear diapers and keep sexual function, or lose sexual function and lose the diapers." Sorry, I'm looking for more acceptable alternatives.

    Being an alpha geek, I of course did massive google research, and kept encountering references to prostate massage as a potential source of at least partial relief to some of my issues (or lack of... ;) ) That, of course, led me here, and this is one of the greatest sites anywhere on the subject of anal pleasure and prostate info. I'm working around to a Helix, for starters.

    Does anyone have any experience with anorgasmia and the Aneros? If I can't achieve a typical penile orgasm, maybe I can reach a prostate orgasm, or perhaps the added stim of the Aneros during vaginal sex will help to bust through that damned wall. My bride of 37 years is sympathetic and patient, and no matter how bad things may get, I'm thankful every day for her supportive presence. She's wise enough to know that it's the ride that's the most fun, not just the arrival at the destination. One of her favorite things, though, has always been watching me as I come (daddy gets all vocal and squirmy and twitchy, and stuff), and she misses that, as do I. We're both hoping the Aneros is at least a partial solution.

    Gotta run; wifey's at Zumba and I promised to clean up house while she was out.

    Thanks everyone for a site that I can feel comfortable enough to divulge all this, and not fear the replies.

  • rickgrickg
    Posts: 94
    While this is an old thread, I would invite any guys around this age to join us in the Senior Lounge in the Groups section.