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feel like i let myself down when i ejaculate
  • shyzen
    Posts: 18
    hi everyone

    having abit of an issue i need to get over ,
    when ever i go into an aneros session and it gets too much and i have to finish off with a traditional
    ejacultation ,

    afterwards i feel like i have let myself down & give in to the urge
    its pretty dis heartning ,
    i really need to get over it
    any suggestions
  • rookrook
    Posts: 1,604
    Welcome --

    Yup. Damned if you do and damned if you don't.

    I'm one of those "semen conservationists" who'd like to always think ahead to my next session and do the right thing for my 'journey.' I am not a model of Tao or Tantra. I am not perfect.

    I'm happy with this solution -- I don't offer all my sessions to Dame Eupho for the journey. At least once a week I give myself a plain old pleasure/fun anal-play session. I usually plan on ending it with an edging routine to define my very best ejaculatory orgasm. Sometimes I'm weak and shortcut that. I'm not perfect.

    I shoot for at least one dedicated 'journey' session a week. But, I am not perfect.

    Don't sweat saving your life essence. Somewhere I read that the community of Urologists would like guys to ejaculate 22 times a month. I'm far from that measure. I am not perfect. !!!

    Have a great weekend and a superb Holiday Season with good vibes, no matter from where they spring. Hang loose! :D
  • thhn
    Posts: 425
    I was like this at one time.... I found that if I watch porn during a session I have a hard time not masterbating.
    I try to not watch porn anymore
  • shyzen
    Posts: 18
    yes porn definetly takes you further down that line
    its a traditional thing you grow up with and it leads to traditional orgasm too
    i do find porn in the starting stage a bonus for arousal

    but then i really should leave it and go with my own flow
  • jack38
    Posts: 33
    If you're having a good time and feel like having a traditional wet ejaculation at the end, then go for it dude! Don't feel guilty - feel good about it!!! Take care :D
  • HelixerHelixer
    Posts: 566
    First off let me complement you on your nick, very appropriately chosen ;)

    I disagree with Rook and I think everyone can testify how it drains your energy. Personally I used to get sick quite a lot, now very rarely since I've stopped ejaculating, so my resistance level has definitely improved. I guess it effects everyone differently, maybe a bit like smoking.

    It just seems common sense that to replenish 250 million spermcells it takes a lot of energy and resources from your body and of course you just have to observe nature to know (e.g. salmon) its adverse effects.In the mildest case you just feel letharthic in the worst case you've become a static confirming the case that women live longer.

    The reason these urologists advise to masterbate is probably coz most ppl don't know about prostatemassage, that's what it's about, when you masturbate it gets a workout as well, but beside procreation I really can't see any advantage in it. Psychologists probably talk about sublimation and I guess the Tao tradition is the same thing. I believe sexualenergy can be constructively used. There's a reason why topsporters and concertpianists abstain from ejaculation(or coz they don't know from sex in general)because it effects your performance(concentration, creativity, etc)

    I agree that traditional masturbationmaterial(pornfilms)have conditioned you so much that like a Pavlov reflex you end up doing the same thing even with an Aneros. And I find that the Aneros has changed my preferences as well. I think I understand why hardly any women watch porn. I think you set your standards higher with the Aneros. The pornfilms are too professional and artificial to turn me on. Probably coz like with women it takes longer to 'warm up'. Pornfilms are just not the right medium IMO.

    One thing I find now since the Aneros that either keeps me in the mood, or gets me horny are pictures. There are sites where you can download sets of pics of hot women made to view in a slide show. I find this ideal for the Aneros. I put on sets of for example; Puma Swede, Marie Claude de Bourbonnais, Lena Star, Dylan Ryder...etc...and in contrast to a pornfilm it allows more room for your own imagination.. And somehow looking at beautiful women in a laid back way seems to stimulate your prostate better and gives you something stimulating to look at so your session doesn't get boring.
  • shyzen said:

    when ever i go into an aneros session and it gets too much and i have to finish off with a traditional ejacultation ,



    By 'traditional ejaculation' do you mean you masturbate or do you have a spontaneous ejaculation with no physical stimulation to your penis/genitals?
  • thhn
    Posts: 425
    that's a very good point helixer about photos compared to video.
    I grew up masterbating to palyboy centerfolds of the 60's and of course you never got a peek at a pussy, but man were those girls hot. I can remember as times went by, the first peek at a bush in a racey ad and how horny that would make me. Indeed, it would make you use your imagination to create a fantacy.
    I have always felt that kids now get cheated out of that time due to internet porn being so available to any 10 year old at the click of a button. the easing into female nudity is gone with the gross nature of todays porn. it's just too much too soon and there is no need to use your imagination any more. could you imagine being a 12 year old boy in the 60's and thinking " I think today I'll watch a horse fucking a midget" I'm sure today, you could find that and more if you desired.
    I really like your idea of having some photos to view and put your imagination to work. I wish I had kept all those playboys from 40 years ago.
    great suggestion!
  • HelixerHelixer
    Posts: 566
    http://www.pornbb.org/
    (search the softcore and the mega picturethread for hot women)

    http://thepiratebay.org

    loads of sets on there as well....

    There are probably many more sites where you can download for free.

    The models I mentioned turn me on coz they can look so suggestively without seeing them fucking someone else or even here the coarse language or the standard positions etc....or just some sickthemes in some porns, that turn off instead of on, anyways....
  • dtmsmith
    Posts: 219
    The first few weeks of using my helix, I too would most often finish with traditional masturbation. The new-ness of the feelings was too intense and I felt like I needed a release. Lately, this feeling has diminished and I'm able to have sessions without masturbating at the end.

    Right now, I'm doing an experiment. I've been doing aneros-less sessions every night (and sometimes mornings) since wednesday. I have not ejaculated since tuesday night. The sessions are getting more and more intense. This morning, it really felt like I was going to ejaculate but didn't. We'll see how long I can hold out :)
  • rookrook
    Posts: 1,604
    Helixer said:

    .... snip ....
    It just seems common sense that to replenish 250 million spermcells it takes a lot of energy and resources from your body and of course you just have to observe nature to know (e.g. salmon) its adverse effects.In the mildest case you just feel letharthic in the worst case you've become a static confirming the case that women live longer.



    Whoops, I forgot. I only fire blanks. :P :lol: 8) :!: :!:
  • dtmsmith
    Posts: 219
    dtmsmith said:

    The first few weeks of using my helix, I too would most often finish with traditional masturbation. The new-ness of the feelings was too intense and I felt like I needed a release. Lately, this feeling has diminished and I'm able to have sessions without masturbating at the end.

    Right now, I'm doing an experiment. I've been doing aneros-less sessions every night (and sometimes mornings) since wednesday. I have not ejaculated since tuesday night. The sessions are getting more and more intense. This morning, it really felt like I was going to ejaculate but didn't. We'll see how long I can hold out :)



    After another 1.5 hour session this morning, I'm still "master of my domain". :)
    At times, it felt like my penis was going to explode even though it wasn't the least bit erect. A really odd feeling actually. Extremely pleasurable, but still odd. I had the urge to masturbate afterwards but resisted. I must be conditioned to want that release along with orgasm.
    My body seems to be on high alert again, although this time I'm not freaking out. If I let my mind wander, it inevitably goes to my groin and things start pulsing again. I have to find things to focus on. We'll see what happens tonight.
  • Here is an article that might be of interest from the new york times: Sex and Depression: In the Brain, if Not the Mind
  • Believe it or not shyzen I suffer from this feeling as well. It frustrates the hell out of me and I know the urge is very powerful after a session. I am going to bite the bullet and just not do it anymore.

    Something I have found interesting is I am abstaining more often and not watching porn hardly ever. This has been an awesome change for me and I'm happy that I'm not a porn addict anymore.
  • HelixerHelixer
    Posts: 566
    I want to come back on what I said previously. The main thing is shutting out all representational systems and just concentrating on the kinesthetic one....Close your eyes, your ears, your thoughts, and focus on the sensations....sure once youre on your way and Super O-ing you can add some visual delight, but to set things in motion, ONLY KINO!
  • Helixer said:

    One thing I find now since the Aneros that either keeps me in the mood, or gets me horny are pictures. There are sites where you can download sets of pics of hot women made to view in a slide show. I find this ideal for the Aneros. I put on sets of for example; Puma Swede, Marie Claude de Bourbonnais, Lena Star, Dylan Ryder...etc...and in contrast to a pornfilm it allows more room for your own imagination.. And somehow looking at beautiful women in a laid back way seems to stimulate your prostate better and gives you something stimulating to look at so your session doesn't get boring.


    Thank you for this tip, Helixer :!:
    It probably helped me reaching my first dry-O, just in time for Christmas. 8)
    (See blog entry for story)