Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Sign In with Google

In this Discussion

Sexual confidence issue draining my sex drive
  • thecritta
    Posts: 154
    Hi there i have a big problem regaining my sexual confidence because i had to stop watching
    porn movies with straight sex because they where causing me serious issues with my penis being not big enough or my mind telling me it is too small i have a 6.5 inch penis and should not be having this abnormal problem but something is causing this confidence insecurity issue because i have not got enough confidence i cant get sexually excited at all sometimes or not enough.

    The strange thing is i will regain my sexual confidence but only for a few days and then it will run away again i dont undertsand why this keeps happening and it's driving me mad and it's causing me
    to miss out on the joys of having multiple orgasms and most importantly a super O i realise that this problem is purely a psychological issue and not a physical one and it has a lot to do with the way i perceive the size of my penis maybe watching to many porn's has warped the way i perceive it, all
    i saw when i watched porno's where guy's that where bigger than me and could last a fair bit longer than me, when it shouldnt bother me i should just be happier with what i have got which just is not happening, and i cant find a way to overcome this problem completely.

    There are certain things which i beleive may be causing this issue, i am 25 still a virgin never had a girlfriend i have always lacked confidence in approaching women, some of the girls that liked me i just was not interested in them, and there where a times mainly earlier on in my teens where
    i was too shy and insecure to talk to a girl i liked.

    But now i am looking for a relationship, and i cant seem to find any girl that is interested in me.
    But what hope have i got of maintaining a relationship with hardly any sex.

    My second problem is i am looking for a job but cant seem to find one, as i read somewhere
    on psychological impotence that not having a job can be a sociological factor, and seem as how
    i am on the dole i have financial issues that may be wreaking havoc on my sex drive.

    I am sick to death of always looking at women looking for a job just always looking looking looking and never having.

    I beleive that these problems may be having a profound effect on my self esteem and how i look at myself. I am sick of missing out on being able to have great sessions with my aneros, i cant understand why i cant have a sex drive just like every single other guy.

    I just wish i knew what is causing this problem to keep going, i have stopped looking at harmful porn what else more do i have to do? maybe it has something to do with the fact that i am still a virgin.

    Anyhow any help with resolving this issue would be greatly appreciated cheers thecritta

    :oops: :oops: :(
  • Sounds like your testosterone level may be out of whack.
    I'd see a doctor (preferably a holistic one) have bloodwork done to test for that.
  • thecritta
    Posts: 154
    No it is not that i have had it tested it's psychological problem that is driving me mad. I dont know what too do.
  • BusterBuster
    Posts: 953
    thecritta,

    You have gotten yourself checked out medically and it is not that. So, it sounds as though you could use some time with a therapist of some kind. You are at a difficult time of your life and needing some help with it is not that big of a deal. I am sure that seeing a therapist when you are not working might be difficult, but getting your head in a better spot will most likely help in all aspects of your life. Including you landing a job and a girl.

    Porn does have the ability to screw with a person's perception of what normal is.

    Good luck.
  • Yeh mate I would be checking myself in with a therapist. Unfortunately your the only one that can help yourself here. It's amazing what a positive perspective on life can do.

    Good luck!
  • My friend, you are depressed. I've been there.
    All your symptoms have depression written all over them. Make an appointment with a psychiatrist, today, don't put it off. Hopefully they will proscribe you anti-depressants that will pull you out of the rut you are in. And no, you don't have to be on medication the rest of your life, you just need the assistance of medication to lift you out of this malaise and get your life back on track.
  • Your not alone in the job search area...
    By the way if the size of your dick is whats geting you down then just make it bigger!!
    Those Extagen tabs with the cyberian ginseng and other good stuff work wonders I think I got like an inch and a half plus girth in a month and a half with 2 months worth left.
    Fun stuff too makes you horny as hell!! just make sure you get the right one lots of ripoffs out there!
    But come on don't get depressed over 6 1/2 man..I think that's pretty much average.
    You know how shit is with porn all those guys are horse hung and they are singled out for porn!
    They are prob like a small percentage of the population you know.
    At any rate the US economy sucks bad and I feel you. Hang in there.
  • A gal friend once commented, "It's not the size of the pen, it's the penmanship...!" That really put me at ease (and I only measure 6 1/4, tops!).

    I think I lost my virginity at 25...with a gal whom I eventually married four years later! Don't worry... the right girl for you is out there...probably worrying that she'll never find the right guy. These things have a strange way of working out.

    As far as the depression issue, that's normal...especially considering the employment stress you are experiencing. Most forms of depression are caused by an imbalance of chemicals in the brain and that is something we can't control. If you don't have a therapist, your general practioner can prescribe anti-depressants for you. But they take a long time to reach therapeutic levels, so don't delay in seeking assistance. There is no sense suffering when help is easily available. And the other readers are right...low testosterone can cause the same symptoms. Trust me; been there, done that...

    Remember to keep an exercise routine during this temporary downtime. Natural endorphins are a great way to improve your mood...and protect your health from the ravages of stress.

    Best of luck to you with this. Keep us posted about what is happening 'cause you'll find many people on this forum care about you and want you to succeed.

    slipperybugger
  • Hi guy's, I would think your added size is due to the Aneros that was the first thing my wife and noted after about my 2nd session. thought I would put in my two cents worth.
  • thundersplace.org is all about natural penis enlargement. You can make it bigger through a couple very simple exercises. Last I heard on thundersplace (3 years ago) there were no pills that could make your dick bigger, I'm guessing that still holds true. Although some supplements can help you in your exercises. Go read up. But remember:

    It's not how deep you fish, it's how you wiggle your worm. 8)
  • alright, let's go through the checklist of stuff that bothers you:
    1. not sexually confident
    2. no job
    3. curbing of excessive porn viewing (doesn't strictly bother you, but if it were me...i'd be bothered)
    4. Still a virgin at 25 (you're still in the game brother)
    5. unable to find a relationship

    I can tell from the way you phrase things that you aren't thinking logically...an example:

    i cant understand why i cant have a sex drive just like every single other guy.



    Trust me man, every single other guy isn't having a picture perfect sexual experience, everyone's different. When I was 19, I could happily go three or four rounds with a woman before catching a couple of hours sleep. When I was 15 I could masturbate all night and then go to school the next day without catching any sleep at all.

    Now, a few years down the line, my sex drive varies, my girlfriend lives abroad so I don't have much sex, my relationship isn't exactly perfect for this and many other reasons, I am gainfully employed and it's about as much fun as being unemployed, I watch waaay too much porn to counter-act the fact that I'm not getting any, and I kind of wish I was a virgin again so I could experience amazing sexual fantasies without sexual experience getting in the way. OK, maybe the last one isn't that convincing, but I'm trying here!

    The point of all this is, perception is relative. We all go about our daily routine experiencing reality as we see it. It is unique, it is ours. What kind of emotional spin you put on that reality is down to you.

    There are a lot of things wrong in my life right now, I know it, I endeavour to fix those things...and I sure as hell am going to have an awesome time whatever happens.

    anti-depressants is not a good road to go down, because it is submitting to the fact that you have a problem...when the reality is....you decide what happens in your own head. A lot of people go for years thinking...'I'll get a job and then I'll be happy', or 'I'll lose my virginity, and then I'll be happy' - it's faulty programming for your brain - be happy first, the rest comes shortly after.

    The amazing things which have happened in my life all occurred when I was in a really positive state of mind. Getting into that positive state is as simple as choosing to be.

    I wish you all the best mate, get out there and start making things happen :wink: