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First time user doesn't know what to expect
  • red87
    Posts: 2
    Hi

    I ranted a little bit so if you just want my question, scroll down to the bottom, otherwise enjoy my story!

    I got myself an Aneros after a few months of reading about it and a lot of fantasizing about these 'super-o's which sound wonderful. A little background about me - I'm a pretty average 20 year old guy from Australia, and I'm a virgin, so as you can imagine I spend quite a lot of time thinking about sex, and thinking about the different kinds of pleasure you can have. I have always envied women since I learned about their more-or-less endless supply of orgasms they can have, versus the male 'once-off' orgasm, and the Aneros sounded like a holy grail.

    While I'm very shy publicly about sex, I spend a lot of time on the net and I've concluded that porn is porn so whatever gets you off whether or not you agree with it is fine, to this end I have checked out gay porn, and some of it is great, and some is a turn-off - this curiosity led me to question my own sexuality, and since I havent tried sex with either gender, I figured the best way to get an idea would be to try it out, and I thought a sex toy would be the best way to experience anal sex.

    Initially I wanted to go straight for an Aneros, but none of my local sex shops could supply them (and man was it a stressful calling one!) - instead I thought I would try a buttplug which I could easily buy under the guise of being for a girlfriend, for example. I went down to my local establishment and after driving past it twice and getting my nerve up I went in and bought the thing, and some silicone based lube. (which I would later find out was no good for anal, despite what the store person advised me - I later received better advice from a different store person when I returned) After trying it out, I found I couldn't even get the thing inside me, but I did enjoy playing with it and continued with my sessions every couple of nights, I was generally very careful and was mindful that pain meant I should stop, and it was a wonderful experience to learn new things about myself.

    This re-invigorated me in my quest to try the Aneros, which had been shot down previously because of a lack of stores to provide it, and my lacking a credit card to purchase online. I eventually found a store called "Headquarters on Crown" who accepted bank transfer as payment, I waited a little while for a Helix to come into stock after doing my research and reading that it was best suited to beginners, and purchased my Aneros. A plug for headquarters on crown as they provided excellent service to the point that after I inquired about the stock of the Aneros they emailed me as soon as it came in to let me know (not that I hadn't been checking the site daily!)

    I was both excited and apprehensive when it arrived, you see I have to be discreet as I live with my parents and while they are very accepting of me, I did not want to make a big deal of this. After reading the accompanying documentation and trying to rid myself of my expectations, I went to bed, lubed myself up and inserted the Aneros. I was honestly expecting to feel nothing, as I had done a lot of reading about how the device is not an instant ride to orgasm, but in fact it felt quite nice, after I got past the initial discomfort of having my prostate pressed on, I tried the relaxation exercises and breathing exercises, and tried some contractions.

    I was perhaps a little over-zealous in trying to give the aneros a huge workout on my first attempt, as before I had realised it, I had been at it for nearly two hours, deciding that sleep was in order, I masturbated and had a very enjoyable orgasm, with the Aneros providing some different sensations during orgasm than what I'm used to. I noted two things, one was that my orgasm didn't have the usual .... 'pleasure hit' that I get when masturbating normally, usually when I orgasm I have a pleasurable sensation in my pelvis area followed by this sensation spreading throughout my body and becoming white hot, so much that I close my eyes. With the aneros its as if the pressure on my prostate blocks this sensation from spreading outside of my pelvis, which leads to a huge disappointment for me, as I am denied the peak of my orgasm. This seems to happen all the time when I use my Aneros, but I am slowly learning to enjoy my orgasm in a different way, and focus on the prostate instead of my penis.

    The second thing I had noticed was that my erection was much harder and thicker than normal, which I thought was great, unfortunately after I orgasmed and removed the Aneros, my penis began to go flacid, but I found that the underside of the head of my penis did not, and stayed swollen. At first I didnt worry but after 20 minutes when i still had this huge bulb of flesh I was concerned enough to go on the net and look up what could be wrong. I had what I believe to be thrombis of the penis, where a clot occurs in the penis. Now I am not the fittest person in the world but I'm not obese and despite living a sedentary lifestyle did not think a thrombosis could happen to me, least of all in my penis!

    Thankfully I read that the condition was mostly harmless and usually went away on its own, I returned to bed and in the morning it was back to normal, but a very scary experience for me nonetheless. I don't blame the Aneros for this of course, but it has lead me to keep an eye on my session length as I don't want to push my luck.

    Over the next few weeks I would use the aneros frequently, and each time would learn something new about myself and about how my body works. It has been a wonderful journey, if somewhat frustrating to have your end goal seem so far away. I have however, made progress, and I believe I came close to 'something' last week.

    I have read on the forums that a lot of people say after having their first Super-O that they now realize the signs and had in fact come close to one on many occasions before, but had not recognized it and had not known to pursue it. I feel I am in the same boat, I am feeling things but I don't know what to look for, or what to do when something happens.

    So far I've had two experiences which feel as if they might be important. The first was after holding my contraction for some time, I felt an involuntary twitching of my anus, and this became more prononuced, and eventually a twitch became like a voluntary contraction, and held itself for about a second, and in that second I had a wonderful wave of pleasure. I felt as if I was glimpsing at a treasure that was just out of reach, after I felt that wave I immediately thought that the onace was on me to do something, so I pushed my contraction harder (typical penile-driven logic) and the whole thing ended. I've since been able to re-create this twice, but without any pleasureable wave yet.

    The second was after holding a contraction and slowly increasing the pressure over time, until I reached a point where I couldn't contract any more, and holding that level of contraction caused my muscles to twitch, the same as if you try to lift something heavy and your arms tend to shudder. I was able to hold this level of contraction for probably 30 seconds before becoming exhausted, but found that my cock was leaking fluids like i'd never seen before after doing this.

    My dilemma is that I don't know if I am approaching it right, I have read conflicting arguments from people who say either "Do these contractions etc" or "Do nothing, let it happen on its own" and I have tried both, and neither seem to make progress. When I tried doing nothing I found while the aneros did move around, I ended up involuntarily tensing up and every few minutes i would have to tell myself to relax again.

    ----------------------------------

    My main questions so far are:

    1. How hard should it be in terms of physical exertion to get to a Super O? Currently I am having to put in so much work that its like I am running a marathon, the sweat rolls off me and I am exhausted by the end, is that normal?

    2. The penerium tab (spelling?) - how hard should it be pressing? Currently, I can barely feel its presence the majority of the time. Should it feel different when its pressing on the right spot?

    3. Is lying on your back with your legs straight down (as if sleeping) a viable position? I read that some people find that lying on your back can increase the pressure of the P-tab but I thought that since the curly bit would be pressing against your bed, it would reduce the movement of the aneros and stop it from working? I also find that when lying on my back the pressure on my prostate seems to diminish and my contractions become weaker compared to when I'm on my side in the fetal position.

    4. If I feel that 'something' is happening, what is the best thing to do to make something happen? OR should I simply maintain what I am doing? OR should I simply do nothing?

    5. Is it possible the Helix isn't hitting me in the right spot? Sometimes I feel as if I have to contract REALLY hard to get the helix to press on something that feels like it's important. I've heard that for some people changing models makes all the difference, would the Progasm be worth my while getting? I'm 175cm tall and a little overweight.

    6. Am I using the right lube? Currently I use "Wet" with added aloe-vera as the clerk advised me it would be good to the sensitive skin of the anus. I am pretty liberal with the stuff and often coat the aneros, insert, then remove and re-coat and insert again to ensure I'm pretty well lubed.

    I have been trying hard to get away from the penile-driven logic of having to 'make something happen' and instead get my head into more of a 'toying with something' logic, and i have varying amounts of success in each session, but at the moment I don't know what to expect and so I don't know if I'm doing things right, the worst thing for me would be to find out that the whole time I was missing some small detail and that I was so close and yet so far.

    Comments and advice appreciated, thanks!

    red87
  • red87
    Posts: 2
    Well it seems I've made a little progress last night, right after making the above post I went to bed and thought I'd try a session. I had been reading some posts and read that someone said that when they laid on their back (compared to their side in the fetal position) the aneros seemed to develop a certain 'looseness'.

    This struck a chord with me as I also remembered reading that the Aneros was all about mobility, that instead of hard pressure i should be focusing on stroking my prostate.

    So I thought I would give lying on my back a real solid try, whereas previously i've tried it for a few minutes and given up because I couldn't feel pressure. I put a pillow just under my bum so the Aneros wouldn't rub against the bed and laid back with my legs bent.

    I did the breathing exercises for probably 10 minutes, and then moved onto some contractions, I find im getting better at recognising when im holding a contraction, and what muscles to 'pull' to make contractions happen. I tried holding some contractions for a while and didnt seem to make much progress but did notice that the aneros felt like it was moving around a lot more than usual.

    I then thought I would try the 'do nothing' approach, so I laid there and just relaxed, I interlocked my fingers on my chest, closed my eyes and relaxed as much as possible, I let my mind wander and tried to pay no attention to the aneros, after probably 15 minutes of this I was roused from my daydreaming by a fuzzy sort of warmth in my anus. I let myself concentrate, only slightly on this feeling, being very careful not to contract or do anything (as I have heard over-reacting is often what kills a forming super-o) and slowly the feeling began to spread.

    This warmth moved from my anus to all over my pelvis, and then I felt a wave of pleasure, moving very, very slowly outward from my pelvis. It wasn't intense, but more like an after-orgasm glow or tingle, and it spread slowly from my pelvis up my chest, to my head and down my legs, and arms. It was wonderful, while not intense as an orgasm, it came with a sense of contentment and achievement, as if I've reached the first stepping stone on my journey.

    The whole thing took probably 2-3 minutes and i lay there remembering the feeling for another 10 minutes afterward, I then thought I would try to re-create it, but wasn't able to make any progress - in hindsight this might have been my problem, once again trying to 'make' something happen rather than letting my body do it for me.

    I think this might be the first step on the road to a super-o for me, now I just need to get to the next level.

    Comments and advice welcome!

    red87
  • rumelrumel
    Posts: 2,253
    Red87,

    You have asked some common questions that many of us newbies have also asked. As you read more and more on this Forum, you will find differing opinions/answers to those questions. There does however seem to emerge a weighted average on many issues. As your personal experience with the Aneros grows and you try various suggested techniques, the combination of techniques that eventually lead to your super-O will also emerge. With that caveat expressed, I’ll give you my point of view on your questions.

    1. How hard should it be in terms of physical exertion…I believe you do not need to exert much at all, in fact as is often cited here, you are more likely to achieve a super-O while in a highly relaxed physical state with only minimal muscular exertion for holding a low level PC & sphincter muscle contraction.

    2. The perineum tab - how hard should it be pressing? Without getting into the semantics of how hard is “hard” and the “should” of things, suffice it to say the P-tab is designed to reinforce stimulation of the nerves in the perineum as a result of anal contractions and subsequent movement of the Aneros as well as provide a pivot point for movement. As long as these functions are occurring during usage then that is “hard” enough.

    3. Is lying on your back with your legs straight down (as if sleeping) a viable position? Many usage positions have been described as effective, if that position is yielding good feelings for you then it is certainly viable and worth employing. Check out the POLL : “What has been your most effective/favorite position?” at http://aneros.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1910 for other users ideas.

    4. If I feel that 'something' is happening, what is the best thing to do to make something happen? I would advise against thinking about trying to “make something happen”, I feel a better mind set is to allow something to happen and nurture/encourage those effects through mental focus and only the least amount of physical effort to continue to enhance whatever feelings/sensations you are receiving.

    5. Is it possible the Helix isn't hitting me in the right spot? It is possible, but not likely. These products have been designed to accommodate the anatomy of the majority of the male population. From the description you have given in your two posts, I would conclude you are indeed engaging your prostate adequately. You are well within the size range for intended users of the HELIX. Other models do produce slightly different feelings but you are getting stimulation now, I think you should continue to learn with this model for awhile until you get to know your body’s language better.

    6. Am I using the right lube? The question about what constitutes the “right” lube has and continues to be a popular topic on this Forum. My point of view on this is that if the lube is creating good mobility, is safe (no major health concerns), is comfortable & easy to clean up, and does not induce any allergic reactions or urges toward a bowel movement, then it is probably “right” for you.

    I believe you are on the correct path for learning, your attitude is good and you seem to be making good progress. Keep reading the Forum and make use of the ‘Search’ function to find additional information on topics previously discussed by users. Also, If you haven't already done so, I would highly recommend that you read the Sticky posts titled "B's Keys to the Backdoor" - http://aneros.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=767 & "B's Best of the BEE-Line" - http://aneros.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=768 by 'B. Mayfield', also the Sticky post titled "GLOSSARY" - http://aneros.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1619 by 'darwin'. It won't take very much time to read through those. There is a wealth of essential information contained within those threads, which will save you a great deal of time and frustration during your learning process, plus they will answer a good many questions you have yet to formulate.