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Reaching out for help/ideas to combat frustration
  • rckrck
    Posts: 32
    Hi All,
    I've had about ten sessions now. I'll catch up on my blog a little later, but now just wanted to vent and get some ideas. The "problem" is that things are going so well. It would be one thing if my sessions were producing nothing and I was questioning why I have this white statue shoved up my behind, but that is not the case in the least.

    During a few of my most recent sessions I am getting SUCH PLEASURABLE feelings that it is driving me crazy. I get so absorbed in this pleasure and my mind and body is so frantically looking for the release, the "next step", but nothing.

    I've introduced nipple play, and I've been using a very subtle rocking motion (between sphincter contractions and PC contractions) that really gets the ball rolling. I get this immense, building sensation of pleasure where I almost want to moan and then the butt flutters kick in.

    The butt flutters are cool (it's a neat thing to do nothing and have the Helix diving in and out) but they almost seem to detract from the pleasure. They come and take over, and I enjoy them, but that internal, broad source of pleasure seems to dissipate.

    What I'm asking for is advice. This little Helix thing is taking me to great heights, only to consistently leave me with the biggest case of - figuratively speaking - blue balls in the world. I'm up at an apex and then....nothing.

    I'm SO committed to this because these feelings are incredible, but it is getting so darned frustrating to not go over the edge and have a least a dry or wet O, let alone get to a Super O. I'm really not trying to be results based, but the Helix is taking me so high that it's all I can do to stay sane after each let down.

    So, does anyone have any advice? Suggestions? Anecdotes? I know what I'm working towards I just don't seem to know which buttons to press to move forward.

  • twlltintwlltin
    Posts: 602
    Have you tried relaxing and not doing anything at all? In other words making no conscious movements at all (not even stimulating your nipples), and letting it all be involuntary? Give it at least half an hour. Mentally appreciate, but don't concentrate too hard on, each slightest pleasant feeling.

    I don't seem to be able to trigger the flutters myself. Nor am I at the dry-O stage, which I think is defined as a PC muscle rhythm that's like ejaculation, but without anything coming out. On the subject of the PC muscle, have you tried contracting that instead of (or as well as) the anal sphincter?

    PS. Let nobody tell you there's a magic shortcut. Everyone is different. It is frustrating. If you've read my recent posts, I'm approaching the same sort of frustration from a different angle. I, like you, have a deep seated feeling that there's something big lurking round the next corner. I have confidence that given time and patience (lots of patience) something immense will eventually happen.
  • rookrook
    Posts: 1,807

    rck said: " I know what I'm working towards I just don't seem to know which buttons to press to move forward."

    Hey rck,

    The bad news first -- I think there are no "buttons"

    IIRC, this was about the same situation I was in during the fourth serious month in my journey. Confused, I found that I was "mentally dissecting" my sessions move-by-move, atom-by-atom, second-by-second and frame-by-frame. Then, evaluating each of those atomistic elements in great detail.

    I stepped back, decided that evaluation and searching was getting me nowhere. I bought a copy of "Spirituality for Dummies." I undertook additional readings about the history and practice of Shinto and the spirituality inherent in trees, flowers, rocks and our animal friends. At the same time, I signed up with my HMO for elementary courses in Zen Meditation and Yoga. By co-incidence, our Tai Chi Master moved to the East Coast and his replacement introduced our group to the practice of "Meditation in Motion." I decided to 'hang loose' and started packing a Peridise to weekly Tai Chi drill. (Peridise stuck up my ass works like a good-luck talisman !) :D

    Over the next four months I fell into deeper relaxation during each successive session. Spiritual bliss replaced judgemental evaluation. The progress was gradual and occasionally featured a step backward. In early March, 2010, Dame Helix visited me with her blessings.

    Blessings to you rck
  • I definately hear your frustrations. Initially I have found the Aneros to work counter-intuitively. As I haven't reached the upper levels yet please take my comments with a grain of salt.

    Anyway, we men seem to be programmed to be in charge of our pleasure in terms of how we actively seek it out and experience it. As a result we tend to think of pleasure as the result of external stimulation. Of course like any kind of physical experience there are limits to the level and durration that we can tolerate before we no can longer delight in the sensations. The problem with this way of thinking is that the source of pleasure is not outside of us, it is within us. I think what the Aneros does is gives us a focal point to direct our attention inward to find this source.

    I think that when you find the source there is probably no limit to the amount of pleasure you can receive. What I am learning though is that it is not something that I can take; rather it takes a completely passive non act of acceptance to receive this gift. Also, I am learning that just like anything else in life, this is a journey. The steps in this journey happen in their own time, and thank God for that. I take solice in the fact that I have much more to learn on this journey before I am ready for the the next level but the best lies ahead.

    I don't know if this helps you or not, but I want to encouage you to keep on your journey and you will find your way.
  • B MayfieldB Mayfield
    Posts: 2,134

    Twlltin has this right, there is no magic shortcut. While it may be possible to stumble upon a series of stimulating events that results in an orgasm, more often than not there are fundamental changes that one must undergo with one's body becoming accustomed to processing this new kind of sensory information. This is just another element of rewiring. Once you've reached a certain point your body will respond with an orgasm and ironically it may be something seemingly inconsequential that triggers it. In essence it will happen because your body is ready for the experience. From what I've read, both of you guys are at a great place with this... experiencing some wonderful sensations. What is lacking is the coalescence into an orgasmic release. Rest assured this will happen in time.

    Something you may want explore is the power of breathing. Many men take this for granted. Breathing is one of the pillars of Tantra and can be used to stimulate, deepen and broaden sensation, distribute energy and yes even trigger orgasm. Here's a little exercise for you to try without your Aneros. Make a very subtle contraction, one that is just above the level of relaxation
    and hold it. Now, experiment with some deep (lower belly) breathing...and slowly expand your lower diaphragm with air. Focus on the sensation in your diaphragm as you inhale and exhale. This should feel very nice. Now as you continue to inhale and exhale slowly shift your focus to your anus, paying close attention to any sensations that arise from this. Notice as you inhale deeper how it puts a small degree of tension (antagonistically) on your anal contraction? This may produce pleasant sensations as well. Now maintaining the contraction, inhale and exhale in shallow irregular breaths as to make you diaphragm vibrate...almost as if you were sobbing. Focus on your anus once more......feel the push and pull. Up until now you should have done nothing anally other than attempt to maintain the contraction. Now release the contraction and reapply again. Repeat. Focus on the sensations all along the way. (Keep the contraction under 25%.... stronger contractions will hamper the response). This exercise may produce some interesting sensations, anal involuntaries and just orgasm. What this is really intended to do however is to give you an idea of the power of breathing and it's influence on other areas of your body. Naturally this same exercise can be used with the Aneros as well, but practice this without the Aneros for a little while first. You may be surprised with the results!

    BF Mayfield
  • twlltintwlltin
    Posts: 602
    Indeed! I didn't have a session this evening, but I woke up in the middle of the night riding a pleasant p-wave. No orgasm, but very nice and possibly more so for being unexpected.


    Later... I tried B Mayfield's suggestions. They resulted in lower body large muscle shaking, a massive erection and quite a bit of farting. There was no orgasm, but on relaxing afterwards there was a tingle that built a little then dissipated.