Milestone Two: longest disappointment, biggest reward
Posted by on 2011-02-19 02:01:00
Session Length: 2-3 hours
Models Used: Helix, MGX
The next few times not much happened. I read all the accounts, and I was hopeful, but my hope was waining. I cut off the tail of the MGX, which added mobility. I bought the Helix hoping for more.
It hit the prostate harder, which initially felt better. But the Helix moved less than the MGX. It also hurt after half an hour, like it was jabbing me from the inside. Got some movement from the MGX and used it more.
Used different positions. On my back, side, standing, sitting, stomach. Best position was in a recliner because it allowed for movement when did some PC contractions.
I looked at all the forums for tips: breathing, positions, contractions. Mostly passive exercises. I began to feel like it was all a fraud, no better than a butt plug would be, and I'd wasted almost 150 bucks in all.
Once I came through masturbation, it felt really weird to have it inside me. Like if you continue to rub your penis after you cum. Not good. Sometimes I'd remove it before I got off to avoid this. The intense clamping down I did when I got off kind of hurt. This lasted about a year and a half. Fun, but not as fun as edging, and with worse clean-up.
Then one day I started a temp project at work. For one week, I was working twelve hour days. I was so exhausted I didn't masturbate for four days. I'd just come home and sleep. Friday at 2am, I woke up after a few hours of sleep. I knew I didn't have to work the next day, so I decided to really enjoy myself. 30 minutes of porn, then put in the aneros (MGX). I was sitting on an exercise ball because I was able to comfortably sit on the exercise ball and look at porn. After a few minutes, I stood up to get rid of a cramp.
That's when it hit me. BAM! More than the feeling of the usual change in position jolt. I began to squat a little bit back and forth. Then I began to do some pelvic thrusts and it felt so good. Better than penile stimulation by far and I was having trouble understanding, identifying where the pleasure was coming from. The MGX was moving back and forth, left and right with subtle shifts in standing positions. I felt so close to coming, but I couldn't get off despite changes in speed. I felt so close, it was frustrating. Better than the best edging session I'd had thus far.
Finally I started to masturbate with my left hand on my lower back and my right hand on my extremely erect penis (which felt like it was trying to expand beyond it's size, like getting a boner with tight underwear on). No movement from my hand, just pelving thrusts. It felt like I was fucking from both the outside and inside of my penis, like nothing I'd experienced before.
The orgasm lasted for around thirty seconds, maybe more. Definitely worth keeping it in for.
What I learned:
- A year and a half of trial and error, it appears what I needed was to figure out a way to hold off from masturbation for awhile.
- Forcing myself to relax was not relaxing. Forcing contractions didn't help much.
- Not concentrating or actively trying to control what was occuring allowed me to just give in to what I wanted to do, allowing myself to just give in to what felt good. Focusing too hard blinded me to what I felt.
This is what worked for me. I'm sure it's different for others.