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Aneros Blogs > Sexual Athlete (by aneros_user44994)

Sessions 8 and 9

One session before an errand and one after the errand. If I were goal oriented I'd have been disappointed in the first session. I think I felt the aneros on my prostate. I don't think I've really felt my prostate before. At least not in a focused way. I got the slightest hint of something new and different. A different note. Thinner, higher compared to the notes in the anus, canal and rectum. First session I just very gently touched the prostate with the aneros. No pressure at all. I didn't feel much, but I could feel the contact.

The second session was much more intense. Duplicated what happened in the first, then went far beyond. I started applying pressure against the prostate and putting my full attention on the feelings of the prostate. Again, just a fleeting glimpse at that note. But there. At one point I felt that the prostate was releasing something, and sure enough there was a small amount.

I remembered my blog of the other day so I checked on my prediction that I can reliably generate a p-wave. I consciously relaxed every thing, breathed deeply and slowly, I placed my awareness in my pelvis. Completely relaxed, but completely aware. At some point a feeling comes it feels like a twitch of sorts. Put the awareness on the feeling. Eventually the feeling builds, the twitches become deeper contractions. I hate that word! We're not talking about contracting muscles, we're talking about the experience. I want a better vocabulary to talk about this stuff.

Anyway, it was great. I stopped at four p-waves. I realized that I was following the p-wave up until it required more strength and endurance than I had. I couldn't keep up with the wave eventually. At that point I let it go completely, returned my attention to my pelvis and my breathing, relaxed completely and repeated the cycle.

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Session 7

Another spectacular session! I have to be careful, as I told my wife, or I could be doing this all day every day. I set a few goals for today's session. I've been thinking of training as a sexual athlete (maybe I should change that to sexual musician). Whichever. I wanted to stay focused on the breath, stay as relaxed as possible. The goal is to stay relaxed. The goal is to feel no pleasure. In a sense.

As I tuned in to the feeling, just paying attention, trying to do nothing but feel the slightest pulse of blood, there would be a slight contraction that would draw the aneros into me, pressing against the prostate and pressing the p-tab into the acupressure point. Without any effort, not what I would involuntary, but spontaneous. As this happened I very, very subtly tried to stop the contractions, just to relax. It was like I was just pushing back a very small amount. No, that doesn't say it. It's sort of like putting the car in neutral. That little drag on the contractions caused by my intention.

With a clear focus on that, the contraction would build. But at no time did it feel like I was "doing" anything. It was like it was happening to me. I had some "please fuck me" thoughts, followed by "I'm being fucked" thoughts. Like a meditation, when ever the attention is diverted I bring awareness back the breath, and relax all muscles.

I'm pretty sure that experience is called a p-wave. I'm also very sure that I can summon a p-wave at will. Pretty much all I'd have to do is breathe, pay very close attention, and say to myself "no p-wave, please." With the attention placed anywhere in anal, pc region a very very slight movement will occur, and it will feel good. "no p-wave please" Attention reveals that there are all kinds of pulses that will rise in strength and pleasurable sensation. Again saying "no, don't do this to me". At some point the pleasure rises to a level where you are say "yes, do this to me" and you start encouraging things. You contribute to the contractions, holding them, seeking the pleasure. As soon as I catch myself helping I completely relax. That's one p-wave.

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New title

Just wanting to document some things.

After about 6 sessions my body is getting accustomed to the aneros. I'm not completely there, but I can begin to sense the novelty wearing off. My intent is to do my meditation every day. I figure I should be past all novelty in three or four weeks. (Maybe a little longer.)

I'm holding the musical instrument analogy. My pelvic muscles (I'm still not sure what to call the complex of muscles and nerves that I'm dealing with) are in training. Maybe my new blog title suggests a better analogy. I'm training like an athlete trains. An athlete trains before game day doing exercises that have nothing to do with playing the game. Even weight training.

While I like to play the game, my play is greatly improved by training exercises.

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Session 6 (5.1)?

The dark of winter means getting an early start on evening activities. I was up to bed at about 8:30, while my wife stayed up watching TV. I decided to try my evening routine with the aneros in.

I wanted to do some "scales." That is, rather than focus on the pleasure and the rewiring, just to have the thing in me and practice with it.

My focus is mainly on the anal set of muscles. I'm just beginning to have conscious control that is more subtle than just a contraction. At this point I can tell what I want to practice. More than the contraction, I need to work on the relaxation. I can do a contraction quickly and with a variety of strength, but I find the relaxation part of the cycle takes longer. When I consciously relax from a tight contraction it takes four or five seconds.

I also experimented with some other positions. The side is good, and I'm discovering that each side is different. I also tried on my back with a pillow under my butt so I'm not lying on the handle. (May want to modify my aneros to solve that problem.) More when some time allows.

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Session 5

The journey continues. Early in my practice as I am, I'm beginning to establish a routine. I let my wife know I'm going to meditate. She is invited to witness, participate, whatever. I shower and use the anal syringe. Generally clean up. Lay down the towel, etc. I'm going to stop describing that part.

I paid attention to someone (I really should know who) who said to think of the aneros as a pacifier. I did that for a while, and I really liked it. I just sort of sucked on it with my anal canal.

I'm beginning to get over my hygiene concerns. The idea of an anus is not as disgusting as it was very recently.

Anyway, I set the timer for 40 minutes, and pretty much just paid attention. Had what I imagine to be a P-wave.

Sitting here at my desk I'm getting an enormous P-wave. One of those, "your under our control" feelings. Wow, it's really rolling over me. I had to stop typing for about a minute or two. It won't quit. Not that I'm trying to stop it.

The key is neither try to stop it or to keep it going. Attention is all that's called for, no sense of control. I'm glad to set an alarm. This could become enormously time consuming. Better than any drug.

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Session 4

Thought I posted yesterday, but I don't see it. Just a quick note to document the process.

This being my fourth session, I'm getting better at inserting and getting started. Having a routine helps. I was able to breathe and relax and not bother doing anything except pay attention. More later.

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Bought two more

I studied the Aneros store today, and found myself realizing I wanted to try some different models. They had a special on both the Helix and Eupho for $120. A week ago I would have told you it's crazy to spend that kind of money on a piece of plastic. Three sessions with the MGX changed my mind.

I told my wife how happy I am with the purchase, and let her know I was apt to buy the other models. I described it as like a golfer who has to get that next club.

I was reluctant to acknowledge myself as an advanced user, but I think now it's fair to say. I'm well down the list of milestones in the Wiki, plus I really think I have the right attitude about things. Yes, I'm excited about all those things you hear about, but I'm thoroughly enjoying the early, subtle sensations. When I'm in a session I have no sense of wanting more. In fact, when sensations arrive that lead me to try to "going for" something, I find it's best to relax my intentions, focus on the here and now, and not "chase" the feeling.

Can't wait for the new models to arrive.

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Ideas

First I'll let you know that I'm a newby with aneros. I just had my third session today. But I do have 18 months experience doing a Tantra like exercise 30 minutes every day. My focus in those meditations was the PC muscle, but I think my idea would apply to the anal muscles as well.

When I started I had very little stamina or strength in contracting my PC muscle. Over the months I gained strength and was able to contract more strongly and hold those contractions for a long time. But strength is only part of the control. When I started I pretty much had two or three settings for my contractions - 1. no contraction, 2. medium contraction, 3. full contraction. Over the weeks and months I specifically focused on moving smoothly from relaxed to contracted. As I might grip a soft rubber ball very softly and gradually, slowly squeeze tighter.

As I paid attention, I sensed there is very high resolution in these muscles. By high resolution I mean very small steps from one level to the next. And each of those steps has something to offer. While I think it's good to get stronger so that you can extend the extremes, I think it's probably more fruitful to carefully examine each of finest differences is contraction.

The other thing that I've found is that the whole idea of contracting muscles soon goes away. In squeezing a ball, we don't think "contract muscles". We just squeeze the ball. Eventually, those sensations that come from a somewhat mechanical approach will be directly accessible. You can just feel it, you don't have tell yourself how to anymore. Boy this is exciting.

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Spectacular!

I could get addicted to this thing. I'm glad I set an alarm. I'll definitely want to do some long sessions, but I have to fit them into my work and family schedule.

About 1:15, wife left to grocery shop, I let her know I was going to meditate with the aneros, and offered to wait for her. She said no, but that she wanted to be there in the future.

I set the alarm for 38 minutes, lubed, inserted, and lay on my right side. I had an attitude of simply paying attention. I had no goal in mind. I simply felt very subtle muscle contractions. I used the same techniques I'd used without the aneros. Feel a kind of contraction, work to relax it completely, then tighten it very slightly.

Also, just like with the anerosless meditations, as soon as I started engaging the analytical overlay, the free flow of things stopped. When this happened I completely dropped whatever I had been thinking and came back to my breath.

The analytical overlay came up with things like "this is great", "I can't believe this", "I never want to stop." The dropping of the tension is analogous to the dropping of the analytical overlay. It's a form of "not doing,"

I'm thrilled to pieces with the MGX. I now am nearly certain to buy one of each model to experience the variety. (Actually, I have no desire for a vibrator. I want this experience exclusively human powered.)

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It came, I didn't. :-)

It arrived about 2:30. I had decided to run to the drug store and check out other lubricants and get a rectal syringe. I didn't see any lubes that I liked the looks of. I had read in the forums about the problems with glycerin, and they all had it. My Astro Glide is the glycerin free stuff, so I chose to use it.

I got in the shower, washed and tried to use the syringe. I guess I squirted some warm water inside, but I'm not sure. That was a wash out. I got a towel to put on the bed and lay down as the instructions suggest (on my right side, bottom leg straight, top leg knee pulled up to my chest) lubed up the MGX and pushed it against my anus. At the very beginning it seemed difficult to insert, but I relaxed and pushed it further in and it was fine. No big deal. Immediately a little pre-cum appeared.

I wanted to follow the instructions, at least to begin with, so I just lay there and breathed. They say to do that for 10 or 15 minutes, but I couldn't resist experimenting with some contractions. I did the kind of contractions I had been doing in my Aneroless meditations. Immediately I was able to "suck" the MGX into me, causing the P-tab to press firmly into my perineum. It was fun moving the MGX in and out. I'm guessing it moved a half an inch, or so. It was perfectly comfortable, but not erotic. I played around with moving it around and seeing what kind of variety I could create in the motion.

I realized that the MGX made the meditation very different. The things I used to do to get erotic sensations were not doing it. So I stopped the contractions and relaxed and just focused on the sensations. It was all very pleasant. I decided I may as well rest and I may have dozed a bit.

Eventually I started playing with different kinds of contractions. Again, no particularly erotic sensations, but interesting and enjoyable. There was clearly a lot to learn.

I tried it on my back with my knees bent and feet on the bed. Definitely not as good as on my side. I tried to adjust the position of the P-tab. Nothing seemed special about any spot. I knew from the forums that I needed to be patient, so I wasn't really disappointed.

After an hour and a half, or so, I needed to pee. When I came back I tried lying on my left side. I positioned the P-tab and found a spot that definitely had something to say. I also found a different way of contracting that drew the MGX up and pressed the P-tab into that spot. I was having the first, subtle erotic sensations. I had one, solitary involuntary contraction. I saw that the same kind of technique I used in my other meditation applied here. I found a spot that had a certain something and I would contract in a way to put gentle pressure on that spot. Squeezing too hard prevents the involuntary contractions. But if I very gently ramped up the pressure, eventually I felt that little involuntary pulse.

I continued to play and experiment with various ways of squeezing, pulsing, relaxing, etc. At one point I hit a spot that caused me to jump. I felt it for at most a tenth of a second. It was almost painful, but I realized that it wasn't, it was just very intense and a big surprise.

After a couple of hours the phone rang. I got up and answered. Once up I considered whether I wanted to have some herb. (This has all been with "unaltered" consciousness.) I decided to save that for another day. (Or maybe later today.) I also considered whether I wanted to view some porn. I decided against that too, at least for today. I sat at my computer to experiment with sitting with the thing in me. I considered masturbating. I touched my penis for the first time, and I realized that I could cum very easily if I chose to continue. Again, I chose to save that for another day.

I did find walking with the MGX in me had potential of becoming very pleasurable. I paced around checking that out.

I think that pretty much describes my first experience with the Aneros. I have almost no anal experience, so I feel I am off to a good start. My muscles are in pretty good shape owing to my meditations. As I sit here typing, I can feel a pleasant warmth. It feels pretty good.

As I consider, I'm glad I wasn't and am not stoned. My wife won't be able to minimize my experience based on that. I think that I want to try having the thing in me quite a lot. I want to try sleeping with it. So my wife is definitely going to know I'm using it. I also think I will be experimenting with lube. When I pulled it out I think it was pretty dry. Not uncomfortable, but if it were better lubed I think it might have moved better.

More news as it develops.

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