This is an old forum post from 2009. It's long. It's detailed. It ventures into areas of energetic sensation. Quite frankly, some of the imagery seems rather bizarre.
I'm posting it now in my blog for a few reasons. First, the level of detail in how I achieve my Super-O I think can benefit some of the new members seeking answers. Second, I think that some of the ideas and images that are unusual are the bits that I think can be most inspirational. I speak often about shattering barriers and mindsets. In this particular session of mine, such was the case. Third, from time to time I forget even my own lessons. I read this now and think, "Oh, yeah! I forgot I did it that way!" "Right! That's what made that night such a great night. I'll have to try that again." Fourth, I really feel like there is more to this post that gets hinted at all the time, and words simply fail to describe the ideas and feelings, but I like the way I state them in this message. Finally, this is what happened to me. It's a true account of a great session and a great night. I simply want it in my blog.
If no one comments, I believe that many will still find something of interest in this post. As a person who writes, a person who shares, I certainly want validation for what I create and put out there. I want acknowledgement. What I don't want is to admit it. I want people to secretly know that's what I want, and then to give it to me. However, life just doesn't work that way. I am fully happy knowing that I am able to share this with an audience who might enjoy it. To that end, here is the first Super-O I ever had after my third or fourth session.
This was written and posted in November 2009. The actual session was a few weeks prior in October. I don't remember the exact date. What follows is the post in the forum from November 2009.
I just had the most wonderful experience. I finished about a two hour session just a few minutes ago. I'm still kind of out of it. It's almost as if I'm half here, the world in which I type and function in the ways that I am required to, and a world that I just discovered, where everyone seemed connected and focused on the same goals of harmony, pleasure, love, connection. To back track and start from the beginning, or behind as the session actually started (forgive the bum pun), I just wanted to take a nap with my Eupho inserted to get a general feeling of relaxing and letting my body naturally contract with the Eupho inside of itself. In this regard I feel it necessary to say "my body" because I have mentally been forcing contractions the first sessions. While great in and of themselves, it was not my bodies desire to move the Eupho in that sense, it was my own will. The point of my taking a nap was to put my will aside and let my body show me what I've been missing.
The results were astounding. I've incorporated the advice that I've learned here in setting up tonight's session, as it were. To be honest, I had just intended to get a little bit more comfortable with the Eupho and more relaxed, enjoying its subtle movements inside of me. The advice about lube came in handy. Last night I purchased a small jar of Vaseline and a new bottle of KY Silk. I coated my anus with a thin layer of Vaseline and then used the tip of my finger to coat the inside. I then did the same with the KY Silk. After that, I coated the Eupho with a thin layer of Vaseline and, after the initial coating of Vaseline was on the Eupho, I slicked it up with the KY Silk. After that, I let it find its own home inside of me, made sure the P-tab was hitting just the right spot, turned over to my side lying down, pulled the covers over me, and went to sleep.
It was a spotted sleep at best. Meaning, as soon as I really started to reach a deep sleep, a wave of pleasantness would wash over me and wake me up. Each time this jolt of pleasure pulled me from my harmonious dream world, I was tempted to squeeze down hard and bring the orgasm to me. Instead, I closed my eyes, told myself my body is just having its own experiment right now, turned off my mind, and went back to unconsciousness, which is really the only way to let the body wake up on its own, I think. After about an hour of this process, I came to once more. Only this time the grogginess that caused me to take a nap in the first place was gone. Now I was awake with excitement. What had my body learned in this last hour I wondered? I decided to try my best to relax my mind as if I were sleeping and treat it as if it were unconscious. I tried to be a fly on the wall spying like a voyeur on my body.
The results did not disappoint by any means. After a few moments of mentally staying away from myself, I decided to jump back in just a little bit. Sort of like putting my big toe into the ocean at the beach. The few days before, when I first got to the beach on my 7 day vacation, I jumped right in full body wanting to take in as much as possible as quickly as possible. That's how I would describe forcing my deep anal contractions the past few days. Pushing the Eupho out then pulling it back in with my anal contractions and muscles was like giving it to myself. I believe I did this mentally because it was familiar to me, from where I would do the same with my dildo. This time however, I knew I still had plenty of time left in my vacation and I just wanted to test the water. Maybe I didn't even want to go swimming in the ocean today. Maybe I just wanted to get a nice sense that I arrived and could soak in that peace and understanding, knowing that my time and ability to enjoy all that is out there has just begun. So, mentally, I just start to take the vaguest amount of control. Just enough to say, "Hey, body, I'm here with you now. I'm not fighting you or forcing you this time. What can you teach me this time? I'm here to listen to you. I don't think I ever have before. But, I'm willing to now, if you'll speak to me." And speak to me it did.
I used the lightest of contractions to whisper to my body that message. I physically felt the Eupho moving around inside of me. Being used to larger toys and sheer girth, this was a new sensation entirely! In fact, I have lately become so accustomed to spreading myself open that I was starting to become a size queen! This experience has opened me up more spiritually and mentally than I could have ever hoped for physically. What happened was that the most gentle of contractions started to turn into the muscle quivering around the Eupho. This in turn caused the Eupho to dance around inside of me. The only way I can describe it is this way. It's as if someone was able to put an orb of electricity to a very specific area and the currents pulsated inside of me stimulating me and teasing me, dancing around all of my spots, ones that I didn't even know could feel this engorged, stimulated, teased, electrified, and pulsating. Everything inside of my throbbed. And I learned a new definition of inside of me. Not just my body, but my essence. It's as if I were in scuba gear the whole time swimming in a cosmic pool of connectedness with everyone, but didn't know it because my suit was too tight to feel anything out side of it, my goggles too small to allow me any other viewpoint other than what was directly in front of me, and my breathing apparatus giving me too little oxygen to be free. Instead of being free, I was doing my best to stay confined in my cosmic scuba suit too scared to drown. Meaning, too scared to free my mind enough to trust my body and soul to be able to join the cosmic pool of connectedness and enjoy the rest of everything, the universe, humanity, anything and everything that is made of universal stuff and energy.
What happened physically is that my body began to take over the Eupho itself. It caressed me and told me to relax and sit back. It told me that for too long I had tried to find my own source of pleasure. I had tried to force orgasms when my body didn't really want them. Often times I masturbate when my body doesn't want to. I usually masturbate so frequently, at least twice a day, that my body is often drained and can no longer manage to naturally enjoy itself. I come up with mental scenarios to get me off. And that's exactly how I treated sex, as a way to get off. Even with my partners, I want the strongest, most powerful orgasm, that gets me and them off. I focused only on the physical aspect of pleasure. This time, my body showed me how to enjoy the universal pleasure of everyone. The more I relaxed, the more I remembered what others said. Don't force anything. If your body is wanting the nipples stimulated, stimulate them, but not too much. Just do whatever the body wants and asks for. I started to listen to my body. I rubbed my pelvic area, but not my penis, when I felt a need to. I rubbed my cheeks against my pillow when I felt the want to. My hips swayed and moved on their own, allowing my mind to wonder and drift. The pleasure I never trusted my body to feel when I would force orgasms was staring to come to me on its own. In fact, the pleasure my body was giving me greatly trumped any amount of mental imagery or scenario I could think of. The results of this total release was enriching on a whole new level. It's as if I learned more about me from this session. I learned how to just let go.
In letting go different images came to my mind. At first I was trying any image to keep me aroused and reach the level or orgasm I wanted to reach. Briefly I thought of my partner giving me a blowjob, or me inserting my partner, my partner inserting me, ect... Shortly though, my body told me to not think about that. Instead, I got different images. Not only different images came to mind, but different feelings as well. My body told me this, "You feel that energy that is swelling inside of you? You are letting if flow freely now. This is why your body moves the way it is right now. This is why this great pleasure fills you and cradles you. Your entire being is now being held up by this energy that you feel. It is surrounding you, comforting you, and keeping you. At the same time, everyone has this energy. We all share, every single living thing, this energy of sheer positive love and support. Right now, others in this world are sharing the same ograsmic feeling you are. Others are feeling sorrow, or hatred, but we are all part of the same universal energy. Every single one of us is reaching out in our own way to others. Right now, those on the sexual plateau are reaching out to you. For the first time, you can reach out to them now and give to them and take from them. It's a web of interconnectedness. In not taking selfishly, but sharing equally, the universal bond formed can comfort and support like no other bond imagined." What I did was imagine my energy surrounding me. The total feeling of all my experience, good, bad, negative, positive, bliss, sorrow, and it filled me. It filled me with such joy and pleasure. The feeling that became more and more predominant was love. Everyone reaching out to me was love. Hands caressed me. Plump, inviting breasts rubbed against me. Luscious, gorgeous cock teased me. I could feel myself reaching out to all of them as well. Everyone that came to me, I went to them also. My love went out to everyone that I know. Even those from my past that hurt me, I remembered that they hurt me so because I loved them dearly and deeply. I no longer felt the hurt from them, but only wanted to tell them that I did and do indeed love them. After this phase and love transpired, my energy and self went out further. It’s as if I had found all of those on the same sexual high that I was on. The few of us found each other. My jealousy of my partner wanting to share someone else left me. Instead, I felt that my partner was right all along. The person that was to be part of the activity was right all along. My jealously came from a need to posses. I had to have my partner solely to myself. My enlightenment was telling me that we are all meant to share and be with one another. Constrictions do not allow us to grow. We have to be completely free in order to grow. So, while my body squirmed and flowed in the most intense, and comforting sensation it has ever known, I allowed myself to envision partner swapping for the first time without a tinge of jealously or anger.
In doing so, I felt love again. I felt that my soul was connecting to my new partner. I desired deeply for my partner’s soul to connect to her new partner. I had a need to know my new partner on a spiritual level. I had a need for our souls to connect through the actions of our bodies. I had the need to understand my new partner. Instead of holding on to my old thoughts of being closed up and declaring without doubt that my way of thinking is right, I had a deep and urgent need to know what my new partner was thinking. What are her perspectives? As these thoughts swam about my head, my body shook and lost all control. Tidal waves of pleasure lifted me up and, rolled me over, and crashed me back down before the tide carried me back out to sea for another roller coaster ride of orgasmic ups and downs. Each Super-O triggered every nerve ending in my body more than the previous one. My hips bucked into the air. My head flailed back and forth. My toes curled. My hands grabbed the blankets I was lying in and squeezed them with every ounce of strength I had. I moaned, I screamed, I whimpered, all at the same time. While my body found news joys, my mind kept drifting further out into what I felt was the universal ocean of connectedness.
With each passing Super-O, and I can say with ease that they were Super-Os, my mind told me to let go even more. Instead of just focusing on the love of a single partner, experience the love of everyone at the same time. At first I thought of a big orgy, but quickly my mind and body told me that was wrong. Instead, the same aura of energy surrounded me again. This time, spiritual forms of energy enveloped me in my mind’s eye. I felt like I was hovering in a blue sky with the most fluffy white clouds painting in. The sun was shining, but nowhere to be seen, keeping sheer light in front of me and around me. While my mind grew used to this free floating state, those seeking me out found me. They hovered below me, above me, next to me, and even inside of me. The most connected feeling I could imagine was turning the image of my physical self into pure energy, like those around me, and letting them overlap with me. When this happened, everything I was lit up with sexual energy and orgasmic dominance. I no longer had control. The Eupho had control. Not only that, my body had control. I had an anal orgasm so strong it shot out the Eupho. I had to pause and put it back into me before I could continue. On the final leg of my journey, where a Super-O was so strong my hips bucked up so high I was in a bridge position with my head looking back at the wall behind me, my mind filled with the most curious, but delightful of images.
Now, this next part may seem bizarre, but it was perhaps the most wonderful idea I could think of, and I didn’t even think of it. All of the energy that had overlapped me, and I knew this energy to be other souls traveling this same high road that I had managed to find, began to take form. Once again flesh developed from these energies. I thought that connecting on a sheer energy level was the greatest pleasure. Until one final push and concept came to mind. My body told me that I had tasted the energy of all, that everything shares this energy, but that I am unique, as are others, in that while we can feel and share this cosmic energy, we are also flesh, and our flesh can feel at the same time our souls and energies can feel. This is why the energized souls began to reform into perfect bodies holding me, touching me, kissing me, and licking me. While I was looking forward to a nice orgy fuck, again things changed on me. The image of a man became somewhat different. He was leaning on top of me. I thought he would penetrate me. I was looking forward to the feeling of pressure and stiffness. Instead, something else happened. In a mental connection, I had the urge to go inside him, to penetrate him, but it wasn’t my penis penetrating his anus. Instead, the tip of my penis rested at the base of his scrotum. What happened next I couldn’t have imagined. His scrotum opened up and allowed my penis to enter his penis as if it were a vagina. I could feel his orgasm washing over my penis, and his ejaculation coating me. My penis became part of his and our pleasure doubled as I slid up and down, in and out of him. While this was going on, a woman placed her hips at my anus. Her vagina slid inside of me and I felt her juices rubbing the inside of me. I felt like I was her vagina being penetrated. I felt stuffed and teased at the same time. I felt like her clit rubbing my prostate was my clit being rubbed. I could envision her vaginal opening contracting. She was in the same state of orgasmic bliss that I was in. While the two sensations were on a whole other level by themselves, I wasn’t quite done fulfilling this last Super-O of flesh and soul connection. One more person was hovering around. This last person to form into solid, as solid as we were anyway, matter was a man. His pelvic region hovered over my mouth. Instead of naturally wanting to lick his scrotum, and eventually his shaft, like I do in real life, I had another idea and desire. I put my face inside of his rectum and began to lick his prostate. It was in the same manner that the woman was able to insert her vagina into me and the same way I could put my penis inside another man’s penis. It was the same energy overlapping that occurred moments ago in a pure state. This time, slight forms of physicality added to the sheer energy state. In this manner, there was no disgusting thought of the nasty rectal feces or another other unpleasantness that occurs in real life. It was the final stage of my mind opening up. It was an announcement. See what can happen when limitations are removed? Anything can happen. Anything that can bring pleasure will bring pleasure. My desire in licking a man’s prostate was to share total joy and selflessness with that person. I only wanted to give them the same most wonderful feeling that I had at that moment. Knowing that my source of pleasure at the time came from my prostate, I had a sense that this person had never know that pleasure. Thus, why I wanted to give it to them. It was my way of opening them up to an idea they had never tried before. The impression that I got initially was that this person wanted a blowjob. I wanted, no needed, to give them more. I needed to shatter their little world like mine was just shattered. I needed to let them know that they don’t have to go back to their confinement of reality, but can choose to expand to the endless possibilities of the universe. And in the instant that they released and felt orgasmic pleasure, the rest of us did as well. For a short time, we were all one. Our bodies, half formed in flesh, half in universal energy, shared each and every part of ourselves with each other. At this time I masturbated my penis to bring have a Super-T the likes of which I never thought possible. This was my body giving me that final feeling of flesh and energy combined. After I ejaculated, I crashed and couldn’t move a single muscle for a few minutes. It wasn’t exhaustion. It was lack of needing to move.
The residual of my Super-Os and final Super-T reminded me of the connection I just made with the universe. It reminded me that I need to let go in life more in general. My life is not the confinement I make it or the confinement others want me to believe in. If I have enough faith and trust, my soul and life can connect to those around me who have found the same path of enlightenment that I just found. My partner is one of those people. She had this enlightenment long before I did. For the longest time I confined her. I didn’t think that what she said or believed was possible. She was too much of a free spirit. She would never get ahead in life and get a good job or anything. She just didn’t care enough. The truth is, she just knew what her mind and body wanted. She had a sense of connection that she just knew, and I had to search for. Her mind is connected to her body. Her emotions are letting her feel that. I am in awe of her presence of understanding.
What I’ve learned from this session is not that the Eupho can give me literally mind blowing orgasms, but that I should endeavor to connect to those around me. The love that I felt is real. So is the energy that everyone possesses. When I have sex with my partner, it will no longer be me trying to manipulate pleasure with vibrators or other devices. Sex will no longer be about me quickly pounding my partner to bring us both to mutual orgasms in a near instant. For the longest time, I thought that if I had a quick orgasm, I could have another one sooner, and thus try to stay in that orgasmic frame. I learned today that the opposite is true. Letting go, enjoying the ride, and not caring about the orgasm brings about the greatest orgasm and feelings of them all.